Prove Them All Wrong

Your teachers have said that you don't have an exceptional talent for language, but your dream is to write a book.

Your parents say you are crazy to quit your job and start your own business. You'll go bankrupt.

Whatever we start to do to improve our lives, our fellow human beings will try to talk us out of it. They don't do it out of evil intent, but because they believe it's for your own good. They want to save you from failure and disappointment.

When I say that your fellow human beings are not sabotaging you in bad faith, I must add a qualification: They believe that your intentions are good and that they think only of you in their advice. They do not. It is also about them.

Your friends and relatives also have dreams and goals, and they find it as challenging to achieve them as you do. Most of them will never have the strength and courage to reinvent themselves entirely and actually realize their dreams.

So what does it do to them when they see someone from their environment suddenly summoning that strength and courage? It puts them under pressure.

If you show them that it is possible to turn their lives around, their excuses become ineffective. So far, they have told themselves that they cannot achieve their goals because they do not have time, because they lack talent or because their family is too demanding.

But suddenly you are there and just do it, even though you have a job and a family and also though you have never attracted attention because of unique talent.

The natural reflex when we see our worldview in danger is to readjust the world to our beliefs. Of course, it would make more sense the other way around, but people are not made that way.

From their point of view, someone like you can't create something that they cannot create themselves. So unconsciously, they do everything to put obstacles in your way.

They warn you that you'll ruin yourself.

They try to take up more of your time so that you don't get the chance to pursue your goals.

They make you feel guilty because you suddenly have less time for them.

None of this is meant badly, but the consequences are terrible if you don't fight them.

Do not defend yourself

It is pointless to try to convince others of your intentions. No one wants to be convinced. Only if you need someone's time or money, you must try to get them on your side. You must ignore the opinions of all others.

Every pointless discussion costs time and energy, which you need more urgently for your projects. Every justification exhausts you and demands your mental capacities. Do not let it happen. If you have to, just agree with the skeptics and continue secretly.

It is best not to talk about your goals at all

The best way to avoid destructive criticism of your plans is not to talk about them at all. No one can try to sabotage something they don't know about.

Do you want to start an online business? Then start it and keep quiet. No one needs to know that you registered a domain yesterday and that you were working on your business plan today. This information only leads to a thousand questions that you can't answer yet.

Before the first dollar is earned, no one needs to know what you do on the computer for two hours every night after work.

Let the results speak for themselves

Those who always said that writers cannot make money were impressed and shocked when I was able to pay for our first holiday from my earnings. I had never told them before that I intended to make serious money by writing. They thought until that day that writing was just a hobby for me.

My friends and relatives reacted astonished when they first noticed how my belly had shrunk in the last months. No one knew that I had stopped eating sugar and that I had started intermittent fasting.

I also didn't tell anyone that I've been taking nine different supplements for over a year now to help me become more mentally resilient and relaxed. Instead of explaining why I'm doing this and instead of listening to someone say that it's all nonsense, I just took my pills and enjoyed the changes.

Today I can work longer and more concentrated than before, and my output is continually increasing.

Don't be like the others - be a supporter

Now that you know what problems people who want to change their lives have to deal with, you can do better yourself.

Tell the friend who wants to start a start-up that you think it's a great idea and wish him/her all the luck on earth for his or her project.

Take your aunt seriously when she tells you that she wants to write a book.

Cheer on your neighbor when he starts a project to help the homeless and offer him support.

Be supportive. Don't be an asshole. Allow others their dreams and be part of the solution, not part of the problem.