Personal Safety

Picture this.

You're a younger woman coming home from walking your small dog. You haven't gone far and cut back through the parking lot of the apartment complex where you live. As you get closer to the building, you see a group of unfamiliar young men watching you, but you continue on your way.

As you pass the group, one of them calls out to ask if you live in one of the apartments. When you answer in the affirmative, he asks which apartment. For some reason, this doesn't sound dangerous to you and you answer with your apartment number.

Making a stop on the way to your apartment takes you a few minutes and, when you make the turn into your corridor, you see this same group standing next to your door.

You approach with a smile, chat with them for a minute, and then open the door and enter your apartment.

What's wrong with this scenario?

Everything!

While it's possible nothing will go wrong, the opposite is also true. It's a dangerous world out there. You have to think ahead to stay safe.

The first rule in self-defense is to be aware of your surroundings. I know a lot of people like to put in earbuds and listen to music while walking, but can you be aware of what's going on around you if you can't hear it? Music or podcasts can distract you and take your mind off the world around you.

Now, back to our scenario.

First, if you see a group of people watching you, be cautious. Change directions and go into the building by another entrance if possible. Not possible? Do not engage them in conversation.

Do not tell them you live in this complex. If they were looking for someone in particular, they would ask for them by name.

Don't give them your apartment number. You're a young woman alone, not paying attention, being friendly, and looking like a potential victim.

And don't give them your name. If they have your name and number, they can pretend they are friends of yours when they come back to break in.

As for approaching them in the corridor, if you have ignored all these other signs, just don't. Pretend to visit one of your neighbors. Knock on another door. Turn around and go to the manager's office. They just met you outside and are already at your door? They are up to no good.

Opening the door is a big mistake. One good shove and they're inside the apartment with you, with no breaking and entering needed. A small dog isn't a threat to several people. Can you fight off multiple attackers?

Come on, you may say. Nobody is that naive.

Really?

This scenario played out with a family acquaintance recently. Fortunately, she was not attacked, injured, or robbed.

But she could have been.

She had no idea who these guys were or why they were in the parking area. And yet she gave them most, if not all, the above information, including her apartment number, where they were waiting for her when she arrived at her door.

Folks, you have to use your brain. One person I know imagines possible situations while they're out walking or shopping and what would be their best response. It may be a bit of over-kill, but they will be better prepared if something happens.

If you live in town, walk in populated areas. Pay attention to your surroundings, taking note of who is around you and what they're doing. Keep scanning the area, so you'll pick up anything odd which might be dangerous to you.

Don't approach a vehicle if someone stops to ask for directions. And if they start to get out and approach you, leave quickly. This has been used as an abduction ploy many times.

"I have pepper spray," you may say.

Can you reach it in time? Will you have to dig it out of a purse or pack? Do you know how to use it?

No, I'm not an alarmist. I don't see criminals around every corner.

But I am aware of what's around me.

Walk confidently. You don't want to appear weak or distracted to a predator.

Be cautious of anyone who attaches themselves to you in a store or restaurant. If someone seems too interested or overly friendly, ask store security to walk you to your car. It's far better to appear overly cautious and stay safe than to be a missing person on the news.

Also keep in mind, if something feels off, trust your fear. Sometimes our subconscious mind picks up on something our conscious mind doesn't, which gives us that uneasy feeling. Trust it. Get an escort out to your car. Call the police if something feels wrong when you get back to your house or apartment.

Your door's not locked or is slightly open?

Don't go inside! Call for help. It may be nothing, but do you want to take the chance?

Is it easier to stroll through life without thinking about the possibilities of danger? Of course it is. We like to think the best of our fellow humans.

But it isn't always in our best interest.

Take out the earbuds and put your phone away. Don't be that person who walks in front of a vehicle because you're focused on TikTok. Walk like you're expected to be somewhere.

If this helps just one person out there, it will have been worth my time to write it.

Be aware and stay safe.