Othering in the Workplace

"Othering” in the workplace is the silent yet unmistakable separation that we rarely address directly but feel deeply. Othering is the creation of "us" and "them," the subtle distancing, the invisible walls that go up when people are seen as different, foreign, out of place. It’s that uneasy feeling when you're in a meeting, and someone’s voice doesn’t carry the same weight. It’s the uncomfortable, careful glances shared when a team member doesn’t fit the traditional mold. Othering is real, it’s present, and it’s corrosive, seeping slowly into the bones of a workplace until it's more the norm than the exception.

Othering doesn’t need loud accusations or open discrimination to thrive. It’s insidious, creeping into every interaction, every glance, every half-hearted nod of agreement. And if you’re on the receiving end, you know exactly what it feels like, even if no one ever spells it out. For those on the inside? Sometimes, they don’t even know they’re doing it. But they are, and it leaves marks that are tough to shake off.

Understanding Othering: The Quiet Exclusion

What does othering look like? It’s the colleague who’s constantly interrupted or spoken over in meetings, whose ideas don’t get traction until someone else says them. It’s the subtle shift in tone, the slightly narrowed eyes, the way someone’s contributions are met with polite silence rather than enthusiastic support. Othering is being left out of informal conversations, sidelined in projects, treated as the “outsider,” and never fully let into the fold.

It happens because someone is “different.” Maybe they have an accent, maybe they’re the only woman in a room full of men, maybe they don’t fit the cultural or racial profile that’s become the unspoken standard. The reasons vary, but the result is the same—an unspoken but very real division between “us” and “them.”

This isn’t about overt prejudice; it’s about the subtle cues that remind people they’re not quite welcome, not entirely part of the “in-group.” It’s like getting a dinner invitation but being asked to sit at the kids’ table. You’re there, but not quite included.

How Othering Manifests in the Workplace

Othering doesn’t need grand gestures or explosive incidents; it thrives in subtleties. Here’s what it can look like on the ground:

1. The Unconscious Bias Shuffle: When people gravitate toward those, they feel comfortable with, leaving out those who don’t look, talk, or think the same. You see it in meeting rooms where voices get louder for some people and quieter for others, and in who gets picked for projects, lunch invites, or impromptu coffee runs.
2. The Code Switch Requirement: Some employees feel the need to constantly “code-switch” to fit in, altering their language, tone, even appearance to seem more palatable to the majority. If you’re constantly being asked to dial down your personality or background, you’re being othered, plain and simple.
3. The Credit Snub: When someone from the “in-group” takes your idea and suddenly it’s celebrated, but when you brought it up, it was met with polite nods and no follow-through. It’s a quiet form of erasure, one that says, “Your ideas are good, but not coming from you.”
4. Tokenism with a Smile: Being the “representative” in the room. You’re there not for your skills or insights but to check a diversity box. The spotlight is on you when diversity is a talking point but dims quickly when the real work begins.
5. The Unseen Exclusion: Othering is often most noticeable in the small, daily interactions that form the backbone of work relationships. Not being invited to casual gatherings, being left out of email threads, or never quite being on the “inside” of office jokes. It’s isolation dressed up as normalcy.

The Cost of Othering: What We Lose

Othering in the workplace isn’t just a problem for those who experience it; it’s a slow poison that affects everyone. It drains talent, creativity, and engagement from teams. People who are othered don’t just bring less of themselves to the table; over time, they bring none of themselves. They stop offering ideas, they stop challenging norms, they stop trying. Because when every interaction reinforces that they don’t belong, eventually, they believe it.

The toll of othering isn’t just personal, though it can be devastating on an individual level. It’s organizational, cultural, structural. Teams that lack genuine inclusion are weaker, blander, less innovative. They’re stuck in echo chambers where only one perspective is ever heard, and the so-called “diversity” is just window dressing. The result? An organization that’s brittle, unable to adapt, and eventually, irrelevant.

Fighting Against Othering: The Call for Radical Inclusion

How do we change this? How do we make sure that “othering” isn’t just a quiet reality that some of us tolerate because we don’t have a choice? It starts with awareness. We need to get real about the fact that just because othering isn’t screamed from the rooftops doesn’t mean it’s not happening. It’s in the eye rolls, the dismissals, the silences. Recognize it. Call it out.

1. Listen More, Talk Less: Actually, listen to the people who might feel othered. Don’t just wait for your turn to talk. Don’t dismiss their experiences. Make space for voices that are usually drowned out. And if you’re in a position of power, amplify them.
2. Break Down the In-Groups: It’s natural to want to stick with what’s comfortable, but real growth—and real inclusion—comes from stepping outside your comfort zone. Invite someone new to lunch, ask a different voice to weigh in, intentionally break the pattern.
3. Stop the Tokenism: Don’t just look at diversity as a box to check. Actually value different perspectives and understand that everyone brings a unique experience to the table. If someone is in the room, make sure they’re truly part of the conversation.
4. Own Your Biases: None of us are above it. We all have biases, conscious or not, that shape how we see people. The key is not to deny them but to be aware and question them. Before you judge, ask yourself why. Before you dismiss, consider the root of your reaction.
5. Radical Inclusion: True inclusion isn’t about “fitting in”—it’s about creating a space where people don’t have to change who they are to feel valued. It’s not just bringing people to the table; it’s setting the table so that everyone has a voice, a role, and a chance to thrive.

Conclusion: Finding a Better Way

Othering may be a quiet, subtle force, but its effects are loud and clear. It’s the reason some people check out, others walk away, and many more stay silent. It’s the hidden undercurrent that pulls workplaces apart, eroding trust and morale from the inside out. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

We don’t have to settle for a workplace where belonging is a privilege reserved for a few. We can, and should, push for workplaces where inclusion isn’t just a slogan but a lived reality. We can be radically inclusive, break down the walls of “us” and “them,” and create environments where everyone feels like they’re truly part of the team.

So, if you see othering happening in your workplace, don’t just look the other way. Call it out. Question it. Fight against it. Because the more we confront othering, the more we dismantle the quiet divides, the closer we get to a workplace that’s worth being part of—one where every voice matters, every idea counts, and no one is left on the outside looking in.