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Motherhood tantrums

Staying calm and collected

By Olawale wuraola Published about a year ago 4 min read

Motherhood Tantrums: A Guide to Staying Calm and Collected

Motherhood is an incredible, life-changing experience, filled with love, joy, and, let's be honest... a few tantrums here and there. But these tantrums? They may not always come from your tiny humans. Yes, we’re talking about motherhood tantrums. These are the moments when parenting overwhelms you to the point where even adults feel like kicking, screaming, or collapsing on the floor!

The good news? It’s okay, it happens to the best of us! What matters is how you manage these tough moments and bounce back stronger. Below, you’ll find a practical and easy-to-follow guide to handling your own “parenting meltdowns.”

What Are Motherhood Tantrums?

Motherhood tantrums happen when the exhaustion, frustration, and inevitable chaos of parenting boil over. Maybe your toddler spilled juice on the freshly cleaned carpet, or your teen rolled their eyes one too many times today. Combine those moments with lack of sleep, work deadlines, and the mental load of running a household—it's no wonder moms occasionally feel like exploding.

The first thing to remember is you’re human. Parenting is hard, and no one expects you to be perfect.

Why Do Motherhood Tantrums Happen?

Understanding the “why” can help you prepare for and prevent those tantrum-worthy moments. Some common triggers include:

* Sleep Deprivation: Parenting often comes with less-than-ideal amounts of sleep. Exhaustion lowers your tolerance for frustration.

* Stress Overload: Juggling multiple responsibilities—kids, careers, relationships—all at once can leave little room for calm.

* Unrealistic Expectations: The pressure to “do it all” perfectly can make even small mistakes feel monumental.

* Lack of Recharge Time: If you’re constantly giving and never taking a moment for yourself, your emotional energy will run out.

How to Tackle Motherhood Tantrums

Now that we’ve covered the “why,” here are actionable tips to help you manage those big feelings before (or after) they erupt:

1. Pause and Breathe

This might sound simple, but deep breathing can help calm your body’s stress response. Try this:

* Close your eyes.

* Take a deep breath in through your nose for 4 seconds.

* Hold it for 5 seconds.

* Exhale slowly for 6 seconds.

Repeat a few times, and you’ll notice your nerves starting to settle.

2. Take a Break

It’s okay to step away for a moment. If you have another adult available, pass the baton—even if it’s just for five minutes. No backup? Put your child in a safe space (or distract them with toys) and take a breather. Grab a glass of water, stretch, or sit quietly.

3. Name Your Feelings

Simply acknowledging how you feel can sometimes ease the tension. Instead of suppressing the frustration, say to yourself, “I’m feeling overwhelmed,” or “This is really hard right now.” Recognizing your emotions can help you process them faster.

4. Change Your Environment

When you feel the pressure building, try changing the scenery. Take the kids outside for some fresh air, or put on calming music in the background. Shifting your surroundings can help you reset emotionally.

5. Use Humor

Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine. Try to find the humor in the chaos. Did your toddler just smear spaghetti sauce all over their face? Snap a picture to look back on later and laugh instead of scream. Those “messy moments” often become the funniest stories.

6. Prioritize Self-Care

This one is non-negotiable. You can't pour from an empty cup! Try building small bits of self-care into your daily routine:

* Start the day with 10 minutes of stretching or journaling.

* Schedule time for activities you enjoy, like reading or yoga.

* Ask for help when you need it—whether it’s your partner, a family member, or a trusted friend.

7. Lower the Bar

It’s okay to have an untidy house or order takeout occasionally. Perfect is overrated. Focus on progress instead of perfection—it’ll lighten the load and give you more room to breathe.

8. Connect with Other Moms

Finding a community of moms who understand the ups and downs of parenthood can help normalize what you’re feeling. Whether it’s an online forum, a local mommy group, or even a trusted friend, venting your feelings to someone who gets it can be a huge relief.

What to Do After a Tantrum

Already lost your cool? Don’t beat yourself up. Apologizing to your kids (if they saw it) and explaining your feelings can teach them valuable lessons about emotions and forgiveness. For example, you might say:

"Mommy was really frustrated earlier and raised her voice. I’m sorry. I’m working on managing my big feelings, just like you are."

It’s a great way to show kids that everyone has emotions, and even grown-ups make mistakes.

Build a Tantrum Toolkit

Sometimes, having a “toolkit” ready for stressful moments can help you manage your emotions more effectively. Your toolkit might include:

* A calming playlist on your phone

* A deep-breathing app like Calm or Headspace

* A journal to jot down overwhelming thoughts

* Emergency snacks (we all know how far a chocolate break can go!)

Why Managing Your Own Tantrums is Important

Taking care of your emotions isn’t just beneficial to you—it benefits your whole family. When you model healthy emotional regulation, your kids learn through your example. They’ll grow up knowing it’s okay to have big feelings and, more importantly, how to handle them.

Final Thoughts

Motherhood comes with its fair share of challenges, but no one expects you to be perfect. The next time you feel a tantrum coming on, take a moment, breathe deeply, and remind yourself of this truth—you’re doing a great job.

What are your go-to tips for handling those tough parenting moments? Share your thoughts in the comments below! Let’s support each other through the tantrums and triumphs of motherhood.

Note: Remember, this is a judgment-free zone. We’re all in this together!

Motherhood can be overwhelming, but with the right tools and mindset, you can handle it like a pro. Don’t forget to give yourself some grace along the way. You’re doing an amazing job, mama! Keep up the good work!

Now go ahead and bookmark this page for those moments when you need a reminder that you’ve got this. And don’t forget to share these tips with your fellow moms—they could use some extra support too! Together, we can navigate the ups and downs of parents.

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About the Creator

Olawale wuraola

OLAWALE Wuraola | mom blogger

Digital creator

The trial and error of motherhood and life

Motherhood |beauty|fashion|travel|lifestyle

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