Letter to subscriber

Dear My One Subscriber on Vocal, (I would bet it is my wife.)

I am pleased to have a subscriber on Vocal and glad to have a few readers on this site, yet I am no longer going to write and post things with the view that others will read the material or even glance at it.

When I first signed up, I thought I would write with knowledge and skill and readers would flock to my words. I was incorrect in that belief. I was incorrect because there are many better wordsmiths, much more knowledgeable persons, and many amazing writers not just on this site, but so many more places. At the newspaper, I had the idea that the 3000 subscribers of the newspaper did so to read my writings- I promise I really did not believe that but felt good sometimes to say it.

I, personally, can get lost for hours reading many well-written things on diverse subjects across the web, newspapers, magazines, and books. I even get caught up into too many documentary podcasts, yet I seldom subscribe to any of these things except newspapers. I only subscribe to them because I do still love them.

So, I am embarking on posting writings I need to do for myself. In the past, I would have kept these writings private in a journal or in writings to my wife for fear it would reveal to the world who I am. I am who I am but also someone who wants to be better. The world can judge me on that from these writings. (In this case, the world is you, my one subscriber, and the few people who stumble across these writings).

I hope to gain the guts to publish a series of Letters of Gratefulness that I am writing to all those who have helped me in this life, and I may have failed to let them know. I have read several articles and listened to podcasts on the usefulness and the good of writing such letters. Writing these letters may bring a host of goodness into the lives of the writer as well as the receiver. I recently penned one and gave it to my father-in-law who is a humble and great individual. Neither of us have mentioned the letter to the other and sadly he is not long for this world. I am grateful that I gave him the letter with a few genuine thoughts on what he has meant in my life. I wished I had done it sooner.

Hopefully, writing these letters of gratefulness will allow me to cultivate a more positive and grateful mindset. I can reflect on the people and moments that have shaped me for the better. It will give me a chance to do something I seldom do, which is to show appreciation for others. I want these people to have a peek at the impact they made on my life.

So, I am going to write a bunch of those letters, probably a bunch of short or beginnings of stories (I am terrible about not completing a full book) and much more. I plan to post everything to this site and you, the subscriber, can read and sort it out or not.

Will these stories, poems and letters be good literature? Probably not. Will they serve some great purpose in the universe? No. Will they make me rich due to the huge number of those reading and subscribing? For sure, no! Will it help me mentally? Possibly. Will it help others? Not likely. Will my one subscriber enjoy it? If it is my wife, she will say yes but who knows.

I wish myself luck in following through with posting all the things I write since I fear something about sharing such things, yet don't know why. I will of course continue to enter as many contests as I can since that will give some chance at validation and a chance of gaining some dollar bills to pay some bills.