Just Love

What is my New Year's resolution? Well, I personally have vowed not to make them anymore. Why? I have come to realize that many times they do not work. How come? For most of us, we hit headstrong like a Ram into them with great expectations and wonderful intentions for them at the beginning of the year, only for them to begin to fade away shortly after the New Year begins. "Research shows that as many as 50 percent of adults in the United States make New Year's resolutions, but fewer than 10 percent actually keep them for more than a few months." Dr. Charles Herrick of Western Connecticut Health Network. We all have done it.

It has been several years now that I have begun what I call a 'one-word goal' or intention for the New Year. Why? A one-word goal is easy to remember and it keeps the resolution from 'being specific' to a certain outcome or expectation! It allows for growth instead of change. We, as humans, can be resistant to change.

My first year I did this I wrote the word on a stone to carry in my pocket. Every morning as I placed the stone in my pocket I was reminded of my goal for the year. Each time I reached into my pocket I was reminded of my goal. Then every night as I emptied my pockets, there was my stone for me to take inventory of how I did for that day. I have continued this stone tradition.

For me, this kept me accountable to myself, to my commitment, and because of the nature of a one-word goal or resolution, it keeps it simple. Simple is good, not always easy, but definitely good...and this definitely makes it easy to remember. These are the main reasons most resolutions do not take as Dr. Charles Herrick lists in the article, 'Why we make (and break) New Year’s resolutions, and 4 tips to help you achieve your goals.'

Who does this simple one-word work for? Well, I would say anyone; however, I know it works for me, and maybe it will work for you. I have been doing it for at least a decade now. I have even used the same word for the past two years. I'll share with you that word was 'freedom.' Every time I would make a decision, feel trapped, or like a victim, I would be reminded of my word and that I always have a choice, maybe not the situation itself, but definitely in how I respond to it.

It was also the word or intention I use for my meditations and prayers, not only for myself but for all other animals, human or non. After two years of the word freedom, I have resolved that we are free. We are free to love or fear. Not feeling our freedom means we are living in fear by playing the victim. We are free to fear, that is true; however, we are also free to love. For myself, love feels so much better! I am sure most of us will agree.

So, my word or resolution for 2021..." love." I chose the word love this year. I am done even considering playing the victim and living in fear. I intend to give, receive, and 'be' more in love.

I choose to love my body more, my mind more, my soul more, my families more, the animals more, mother earth more, our nation, my breath, my day, neighbors, and well you get the idea. I choose to love life more than ever before ... choosing love brings compassion, kindness, and ultimately consistent happiness.

What I have already learned in these first few weeks of my New Year's one-word is that Love is an energy, not an action as many of us have been taught, with a by-product of compassion and kindness which can lead us to health, and ultimately happiness.

The Dalia Lama said, "The more you are motivated by love, the more fearless and free your actions will be." So, both the Dalia Lama in his book on, "The Art of Happiness" and Sadhguru (as in the video) have shared that love, happiness, compassion, and kindness can be cultivated.

"While we’re used to the idea of using psychotherapeutic techniques such as behavior therapy to attack specific bad habits such as smoking, drinking, temper flares – we are not accustomed to cultivating positive attributes – love, compassion, patience, generosity." Howard C. Cutler the American writer and psychiatrist followed the Dalai Lama and wrote, "The Art of Happiness."

So, YES! My one-word New Year's intention is Love. I will ask myself as decisions come up whether it is a food choice, a nap or exercise, saying yes to a meeting, going into that meeting, answering the phone, or making conversation, "Am I 'in love'?" "Is this loving to myself and others?"

I sure do look forward to another 11 months of this 2021 year of cultivating "Love," especially if this first month has begun this powerfully thus far.

Rev Ahowan ICrow, OAC, HM, RScP

' https://youtu.be/QsR2agtO_kM ' Sadhguru of Isha University