How to Know It’s Time to Give up On a Goal

‘Never give up.’

‘Try, try and try again until you succeed.’

‘Don’t take no for an answer.’

Virtually every person on the planet has heard some version of these quotes in their lives. The idea that we should have a dream and stick to them relentlessly is well-known. And it’s also helpful and empowering for many people in many situations.

However, they aren’t absolute statements that apply to everyone in everything they do.

In fact, many people get stuck in toxic situations and live unhappy lives because they believe that to give up is to get branded a failure.

I’d like to address this belief and talk about how it is okay to give up on a goal and why you should sometimes. Keep reading on to explore this idea further.

When you should stick to a goal

At the root of it, the notion of never giving up is positive and helpful for many people. If we gave up on a task or goal every time we felt uncomfortable or failed, we wouldn’t finish school, get a job, or even walk!

When kids start walking, they stumble and fall all the time. But we never tell them to sit down and give up because we know that falling is just part of the process.

And this is true for people in many areas of life. If you want to build a skill like learning a new language, it is critical to keep working at it for a long period of time even it seems like you’re just struggling despite all your efforts.

Sooner or later, your efforts pay off and you’ll meet your goal. But if you give up, you certainly never will.

The main point is that your goal should be meaningful and relevant. Let’s go on and explore the times you shouldn’t stick to a goal.

When you should give up on a goal

Not sure if you should give up on a goal? Check out the following ideas that may just help you see things more clearly.

You didn’t choose the goal yourself

It’s very common for children to follow in their parents' paths or work towards a goal their parents set for them.

In such cases, young people blindly go after a goal that doesn’t mean very much to them. As a result, they put in half-hearted efforts that lead to poor outcomes - which creates more stress.

Ask yourself if the goal you’re working towards is really yours. Or is it something you’re doing because you want to please your family or social circle. Don’t feel guilty about dropping a dream that was never yours, to begin with.

Your goal is not what you thought it would be

We often have misconceptions about what getting a certain job would do for our confidence or what being with someone we have a crush on would be like. In such cases, we’ve built up a vision of our goal that doesn't match reality.

For example, you might have admired medicine and wanted to be a doctor only to realize that the work involved is not for you. Or you may have dreamt of working for a big-name corporation only to realize that you’d rather work for yourself.

When your goal doesn’t feel like what you expected, you’ve learned something valuable and important. And you should let go of the feeling of sunk costs and move towards a more meaningful goal.

Your real goal can be achieved in multiple ways

I’ve come across people who believed they wanted to be social media mega-influencers or world-famous entrepreneurs only to find such work unsatisfying.

At the core of their desires, they really wanted to feel confident or to earn a good income to lead a life where they’re thriving. They mistakenly believed that to feel good, you also need to be famous and extroverted all the time.

You need to think about your goals and whether you actually want to reach a specific thing or just have the freedom and benefits that you believe this dream will give you.

For example, many people think that you have to have a college degree to achieve success. And while a degree is life-affirming, you really don’t have to have one to make more money or be happy.

Perhaps what you do want is to earn more and there are many ways to do this that doesn’t involve going to the best university and getting yourself into debt. You can start your own business, go to a trade school and build a specialized skill, or find some other means.

Similarly, you don’t have to look a certain way to feel confident. You can learn to feel good regardless of how you look.

The key is to realize what's really important to you and to find the path that best suits you.

When you realize what really matters, you’re free to ‘give up’ on a superficial goal that isn’t the only way to get to where you want.

Conclusion

Giving up on a goal is not a sign of weakness. When you do it with consciousness and thought, it shows maturity and strength.

It takes a lot to overcome the feeling of sunk cost and to start over from scratch. But the sooner you can do this, the better it is for you.

This post should help you view your goals differently. Take some time to think about what you want in life and make the right choice for you.