Five Cons to Everyone Gets a Trophy

I am a public-school product of the 70’s and 80’s, graduating from High School in 1989. In my elementary and junior high years, I played competitive basketball. When I entered high school, I focused on choral music and participated in one year of speech and debate. Though I enjoyed my fair share of victories and superior ratings, I also learned how to lose. I didn’t always bring home a trophy or a ribbon, and I am a better person, husband, and father because of it.

I learned early in life that not everyone deserves a trophy.

Some argue that every child deserves some type of hardware to take home after a tournament or long day of competition. They cite that a trophy or ribbon boosts a child’s self-esteem and the youngster will enjoy the overall experience of game play. If the participant has a good experience, the odds of returning to play again increases. Win-win. Right?

Wrong.

In the movie “Parental Guidance,” the grandfather, played by Billy Crystal, attends his grandson’s baseball game. He marvels at his grandson’s pitching and celebrates when the batter swings and misses for a third time.

Billy Crystal: “Strike three, and you’re out of there.”

Crystal grows incredulous when the batter stays in the box, readying to swing again.

Crystal: “Whoa, whoa, whoa Blue…That’s three strikes…1, 2, 3…outta there.”

Since Crystal is visiting for the first time, the umpire graciously explains that no one strikes out, all players bat until they get on base, and every game ends in a tie.

One of the other parents aptly comments, “The old guy’s right (Crystal), it’s boring.”

I believe that embracing the “everyone gets a trophy” ideology is doing a disservice in our children’s lives.

Five Cons to “Everyone Gets a Trophy”

1. It harms a child to constantly be praised just for showing up. Much of life is about honoring commitment. Commitment includes being present. One shouldn’t just be rewarded for showing up to school. I know, I know, what about those with perfect attendance? That truly is an admirable feat, but what if the person with perfect attendance earned a “C” average over the course of his schooling? What is more important? A 95% attendance record and a place on the honor roll or a perfect attendance with mediocre grades? After graduation, when this person shows up for work, well, that’s expected. But is attendance enough? In most companies, it’s the productivity that will matter most.

2. It erroneously raises the child’s self-esteem. Imagine the following scenario. A child plays on a team in a tournament and they lose all four games. This child’s team places 8th out of 8 teams and still brings home a trophy…an 8th place trophy. He basks in the polished shine of his trophy, ignoring that seven other teams performed at a higher level. Since he received a trophy, why worry about improving or working harder? Competition is just about getting a trophy, right? Don't get me wrong, I don't believe in publicly humiliating and shaming a child for a poor performance, but neither do I believe it's profitable to celebrate and reward a last place finish.

3. It Keeps Kids from Experiencing Failure. Basketball legend Michael Jordan once said,

"I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."

What if the NBA determined that since the player was Michael Jordan, when he missed, he got the ball back and could keep shooting until he drained the winning shot or sent the game into overtime? Sounds crazy, huh? But that's what some kids' leagues are teaching. If you don't succeed...it doesn't matter. Everyone wins anyway. In some of these children's leagues, there is no thrill of victory and agony of defeat.

4. It raises a world of entitled college students. A study by researchers at the University of California, Irvine, found that a third of students surveyed said that they expected B’s just for attending lectures, and 40 percent said they deserved a B for completing the required reading. This study was administered in 2009. Things have only gotten worse. Another more recent study suggests that up to 50% of college students believe that they deserve a B just for showing up for class. Our society perpetuates these attitudes when we invite everyone to the podium for a medal.

5. Kids don't learn to lose. In one Andy Griffith episode, young Opie signed up to run in the 100 yard dash. When registering at the Court House, he announced his intention to win a medal. To earn a metal he had to cross the finish line in either first, second, or third. Opie finished dead last and stormed away from the track shortly after crossing the finish line. Sheriff Andy explained to Opie that it's nice to win something but it's better to learn how to lose. He replied, "I know how to do that real good..."

But he didn't.

No one wins every game, meet, or race. Kids need to learn how to win graciously. In real life, bonuses aren't always earned; promotions aren't always handed out. Sure, these instances bring disappointment, but should drive people to work harder, not throw in the towel. We should return to the time of rewarding the top performers and work to become one. Hard work and perseverance are far greater in importance than an 8th place trophy for participation.