Fear is an illusion

I find myself climbing a ladder and as I look up, I realize I have so much further to go. I am not afraid of heights, but I am nervous to look down. I only have a few more feet to go before I reach the top when the word “breath” comes to mind. I can feel the warm breath of air release from my mouth as my hands grab onto the next bar of the ladder and my feet push me upwards.

I hear the voices of two other people getting closer as I reach the top. Suddenly a hand reaches down and say’s “you made it, grab my hand.” I reach up and grab his hand as he pulls me up onto a platform. Standing at the top I can see tree tops for miles. I hear my friends below cheering me on, yelling “you got this girl.” I take my chances and look down at the small figures I call my friends. I find myself quickly closing my eyes and pulling my head back up to catch my balance. I hear my inner voice say, “you can this do this!”

I open my eyes to the two guys asking me questions. “Is this your time doing this” I answer yes, they tell me I do not have anything to worry about and to relax. I am not sure I feel secure with their words, but I have never been one to back down from a challenge or an experience that I will remember for lifetime. The two men introduce themselves as Mike and Todd and begin to pull out a harness. They continue on with their the small chatter, telling me jokes trying to ease my mind from what I am about to do and begin to strap me into the harness. I allow my mind to wander freely and banter back and forth with the both.

They ask me how I am feeling and if I am ready to do this. I cannot find the words to reply and I hesitate briefly, then walk out to the edge of the platform. I am now overwhelmed by the drop and begin to ask a million questions, questions I should have asked down below. I am not sure if what I am feeling is panic or an adrenaline rush. I stand at the edge insisting that I cannot do this and hesitate. Again, hearing my friends down below cheering me on, knowing that when it is their turn, will the feel the same. I close my eyes again and ask Spirit, please do not let die today, I am not ready for that and continue to the edge. I look forward at the tree line in front of me while intently listening to the countdown 3, 2, 1 close my eyes and leap forward.

I want to scream but the sound is gone before I can make it. I feel myself drop at a rapid speed and I feel fear, panic, and exhilaration all at the same time. I open my eyes and quickly feel myself being jolted back upwards again and back down, but this time the movement is not as frightening as standing at the top before I took the leap. I land into the big balloon filled mat below and I am gently guided by another pair of individuals at the bottom who unharness me and ask “So, was it as bad as you thought?” I reply with a “no, and tell them, I am ready to do it again.” I am guided off the mat towards my friends, who rush me to ask all kinds of questions. I tell them it was a piece of cake and send them on their way. A smile comes to my face as I mentally check off one more thing from my list. I can feel my legs begin to shake as I stand below to cheer on my friends. Realizing, that fear is only an illusion and you cannot let it get in the way of doing the things you really want to do in life. Cheers!