A New Diet

I started a new diet at the beginning of the year. At first, I was just going to hold myself to two weeks. The changes required great self-control and conscious decisions about what to imbibe. Though it started out difficult, it has become easier to adhere to as I feel the results. I am happier, less stressed, have more time for myself and my family. Perhaps we should begin there, with my family and why I felt the need to improve my diet.

Like many people, my life is far from perfect, there are so many things I could do to improve my physical and mental health. After the last year I was stressed out, unhappy, and honestly fearful of the future. I knew something had to change. But what simple changes would enhance my wellness? I could replace chips with popcorn, naps with walks, soda with seltzer, Advil with yoga, books with Netflix, clutter with clean, store bought with homemade, plastic with reusable, elevators with stairs, meat with soy, diuretics with weight-loss, paper with digital, combustion with electric, panic with peace. The list goes on. But would I feel significantly better if my power usage was a net zero? If my family could afford to eat only organic? If I never responded to “What’s for dinner?” with “It’s a scrounge night.”

I thought long and hard about what I might actually be able to do. I’m never going to give up naps, chips or Advil, I long ago lost the battle against clutter, and I compost, recycle, and shop consignment and thrift.

Looking online at other people’s lives, I found I fall short in ways I will never be able to fix. College friends who make muffins for breakfast and remembered to take first day pictures of impeccably dressed children. Distant family members having a romantic date night sitting at a table with a beautiful view of Lake Ontario. A friend’s wife and her squad: mother-entrepreneurs who run organic health-based businesses out of sunlit kitchens, sparkling pools gleaming behind them in the Florida sunlight. A lifelong friend’s video at a small NH BLM protest when a man in a Trump-flag-flying truck fires a round above the crowd. Another whose lobbying for gun safety has brought change in that most conservative of states: Texas. Social justice warriors brave and strong, living their beliefs. Author’s I follow promote new novels, while I add another rejection to my spreadsheet. Except for my bi-monthly grocery runs, I haven’t left the house since the last week of last February. How could I have known that staying in because it was cold, and I was working from home would go from luxury to curse? Stuck at home fitfully facilitating one student’s online learning and another’s self-directed home schooling, my life seems small and unproductive.

Away from social media, the news cycles are constantly changing but consistently disturbing. Politics are driving people apart. Half the G8 countries are in some sort of internal war, but the problems don’t stop there. With or without politics that have moved from heated conversation to demonstrations resulting in police action, parts of the world are burning or flooding.

Denial isn’t going to make the world better, but neither is overwhelming our psyches with current and future problems. So, I’m going on a diet. Instead of counting calories or monitoring how often I work out. I’m parsing out and rationing my intake of both current events and social media. When I wake up, I check the Case and Death counts for my country and state. I check the headlines a couple times a day from both The New York Times and The Guardian. I don’t check my social media accounts at all. If I need to refer to something on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Tumbler, I give myself a few minutes to scroll, then log out.

The first couple weeks were difficult. Jan. 6th a complete failure. I live streamed the inauguration on the tv and forced my kids to watch it, too. A precaution to avoid falling down the rabbit hole of articles and opinions. As with any successful diet, I have learned forgive myself for slips. But I find I’m slipping less and less. And, as I move into February, I find I don’t miss the frenzy one bit. I feel lighter, have more free time and am working through my book list. I’ve never found a diet I could stick to long term, and perhaps I’ll fail this one at some point. Until then, I’m finding it satisfying in a way no other diet has ever been. It may be the only real diet any of us actually need. And it turns out, I’m sleeping better, down a couple pounds, and taking less Advil, too.