A Fresher Perspective on New Year's Resolutions

I want to change the conversation around resolutions. I want to change the annoying perception of how meaningless the phrase of “new year, new me” has come to be. The truth is, this fad had spread like wildfire over the last couple years on social media until it finally lost its grandeur.

And the reason for that is not just its redundancy, but rather the actions people showed behind it. Suddenly, half way through the year, all goals and ambitions have been placed on the back-burner. Life came at us fast and we weren’t ready for the impact. So, hence, loss of ambitions and seeing the bigger picture eventually morphed into complaints and wishful thinking about how it’ll "get better next year."

It will never get better until we choose to make it better.

Here’s my take on resolutions and why I think they’re important.

For anyone who prefers to take a look at this from a logical perspective, the first of January doesn’t change much in our life. A new year doesn’t classify as a reset button for our life because we still wake up with the same problems, same overdue bills, same BS texts from the other night and same battles we have been dealing for quite some time.

After all, time is a construct.

However, if we choose to adjust our behaviors, habits, or strategies, we are inherently succumbing to the tradition of New Year’s resolutions, yet also changing the way some of our circumstances may pan out.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to better one’s health, financial situation or relationships and the concept of resolutions was invented for that purpose.

Personally, I’ve had a pretty swift and smooth ride from 2013 until late 2017. It can’t always be smooth sailing though. Virtually everything imaginable in my life got screwed in 2018 and my entire year had been in shambles.

I allowed my stress, my anxiety, my overthinking to cause not one, but two major mental breakdowns. I allowed politics and the vicious cycle of misleading newspaper headlines to make me feel uneasy, broken, and vulnerable. It started to mess with my relationships with friends and potential significant others. When I finally felt like I had hit a steady plateau, I got dumped over the phone. At one point, I looked up around me, coiled up in my studio apartment, frantically wondering if I’m going to lose it all.

My finances took a major hit as well and this eventually forced me to have to give up the one thing that always gave me a piece of mind...traveling.

Everything was falling apart. I felt like a zombie going through the notions unable to snap out of a horrid anxiety spell that took over my entire life. Until I realized that I was so confident that 2018 was going to be my year, I forgot to set any resolutions.

Every year prior had had at least two or three resolutions placed in motion, but not this one. I realized I had nothing set in motion, nothing to look forward to, nothing to celebrate towards the end to announce that I made it happen… aside from a lot of valuable lessons.

I may not have set any resolutions, but I embraced my deepest, darkest fears. I faced my demons head-on. I opened up my heart and stopped being cynical about dating. I realized through this that no matter how hard or awful it got, I came out of it with my head held high. Finally, I applied to graduate school and got in on a pretty sweet academic scholarship. My start date is two weeks from now.

So as things started to take a turn for the better, I started writing lists and short-term goals, giving myself deadlines and crossing off any items that have already been done.

Therefore, coming into the new year, I had set up a plan. I won’t reveal what that plan is because I’m a bit superstitious and prefer not to jinx a good feeling, but the point is that I’m excited. That is what new year's resolutions are—goals for the coming year continuing the retrospective dialogue.

We ask ourselves, how hot can I look 12 months from now? Where will I be financially 12 months from now if I steadily save a portion of my salary? What will I learn if I make it my mission to visit three new cities in the past 12 months?

Resolutions change our perspective, give us something to look forward to, improve our overall mental state. It’s the action that separates "dreaming" from "doing."

Chances are that the worst thing that you think can happen has already happened to you. There is nothing to lose. Stop dreaming of a better tomorrow. Seize it and go for it.