That's Called Fashion?

Last week, a group of people gathered in the hotel lobby where I work. They were waiting for their ride to a company Christmas party. The women were dressed in elaborate evening wear, covering just enough of their bodies to stay legal, but not enough to hide much else. The men wore the usual suit or sports coat and slacks. Some had ties, while others sported open shirt collars. What many of the men were not wearing were socks.

I guess I don’t get out much, at least not with younger people, because I had never seen this style before. Maybe they forgot to pack socks and just had to make do? When I asked a young co-worker how long this sockless trend had been going on, he said it started a couple of years ago. He told me he wasn’t a fan and asked what I thought. My reply was simple. Everyone looked like they were wearing high-water pants.

Women have the freedom to wear pants any length ranging from mid-calf to dragging on the floor. A perfect example is going to any medical facility and watch some of the staff walking on the bottom of their scrubs. Men’s pant legs are expected to touch the top of the shoe in the front and cover approximately half the heel at the back. If the pant leg comes up a little short, the sock covers the gap, hiding an otherwise exposed ankle. It’s one of those rules that aren’t meant to be broken.

Men have always been sock challenged, especially older men. It’s hardly uncommon to see an older gentleman walking down the street in a pair of shorts with his socks pulled up almost to his knees. I know it was stylish when Bermuda shorts were first invented, but that was over one hundred years ago, and they were part of a military uniform. Why wear shorts if you’re going to cover most of your legs with socks?

Another sock fashion faux pax, and this one isn’t just old guys that do it, is socks with sandals. I live where it’s warm most of the year, so sandals are common footwear. Why wear a shoe that consists of a sole and a few straps if you don’t want your feet to be exposed?

Sock color is one more problem that needs to be addressed. In the fifties, men wore two basic fashion styles: White socks. Worn by men with heavily greased hair combed back into what was called a D.A. or ducks ass, white T-shirt under a leather jacket, tight jeans with a rolled-up cuff and black shoes. (The John Travolta Grease look.); Colored socks. Worn by men with crew cuts, button-down collar shirt with Khaki pants, and loafers. The socks matched their shirt color. (The preppie look) White socks were never allowed with this ensemble.

Men’s styles have evolved over the decades from Beatles jackets to the Leisure Suit, Nehru coats, platform shoes, skinny ties to wide ties and back to medium width ties. The one item that has withstood the test of time is socks. They may vary in color, have unique designs embroidered on them, but no matter the length, they all do the same job, protect feet. So, guys, put your socks on!

Okay, with my rant about socks over, someone out there might ask, “Is there anything else you find objectionable?” The answer is a profound yes—muscle shirts! For those of you who don’t know what they are, it’s a T-shirt with no sleeves. It’s designed to allow men with well-defined arms to show them off. Unfortunately, most wearers are skinny kids with toothpick arms or beer-bellied old guys with flabby arms. I guess we men will never get this fashion thing right.