Men Abuse: How Fair Is The Justice System On Men?

What is the common image that comes to mind when domestic violence and abuse are mentioned? It is usually the image of a man hurting a woman. Woman is the weaker sex. Woman is the vulnerable victim of the ‘Beast’ known as man! However, the reverse is the case, sometimes.

Where The Law Seems To Favour Man

I come from a place where some men beat up their wives and get away with it for the following reasons:

If the woman is badly injured and calls the police, they will arrest the man and take him to the police station. Later, he will be released and they will advise the woman to go home and ‘settle with her husband.’ They believe that husband and wife should be able to settle their matter.

In a worst-case scenario where maybe the woman collapsed and nearly died, or if she feels that she can’t take it anymore; she will be the one to pack her bags and leave the house for the man. The house belongs to the man whether they own it or rented it. It is the man’s house.

If an abused wife wants to use the traditional method by inviting the man’s kinsmen and her kinsmen to settle the matter, it usually ends like this: ‘The man will always be a man. He is your husband and the head of the family. We have told him not to beat you again but you must obey and submit to him as your husband. Now hug each other and say sorry to one another.’ Case settled.

Most women prefer to bottle it up, hide the bruises and lie about the black eyes. They pretend to be happy and stay ‘because of their children’ and for fear of what people will say if they leave the man.

Where The Law Seems To Give The Power To Woman

I live in the UK and I have heard stories about women who got their husbands arrested and kicked them out of the house for one reason or the other. The question is, how genuine are some of those reasons? Are some women taking advantage of the system to get back at men? How vulnerable are men in this part of the world and who is fighting for abused men?

Someone narrated how his wife hit him when they had a misunderstanding She slapped him twice, so hard that she broke the reading glasses on his face. She started shouting for help, shouting that the man wanted to kill her. Neighbours heard her voice and called the police. The police arrived and asked the man to stay at the door. They went in and the woman told them a concocted story; that her husband hit her and pushed her so hard that she hit her head on the wall.

They came to the door where the man was obediently standing. They put handcuffs on him, told him he was under arrest and took him away without asking him for his side of the story!

That was his last day in that house. On his release, the police followed him to pick up his stuff from the house. He had to rent another place across town far from his wife and children, as the police ordered him to. He was considered to be dangerous to his wife and had to sign some documents in agreement to never go to that house except when the police accompanied him. And that was the end of the marriage too.

I felt so bad when I heard the man’s story.

He had evidence to prove that his wife hit him: his broken glasses, and the mark on his face… even took pictures before the police arrived to show that he was the victim in this case. But it didn’t matter because he was the man. In this part of the world, the law favours the woman, listens to the woman and fights for the woman. And I ask again: Who is fighting for the abused men?