Chinese style love

What ruins our relationships with our partners? If you think about it, burnout is a big thing. Being together for a long time, being too familiar with each other, the loss of mystery, and the deposition of contradictions caused by burnout, also made everyone become silent.

These are the most realistic, trivial and grinding life, and the couple will always be in opposition to each other.

Why is that?

Two people have different positions, different ideas, different angles, when quarreling to find who can not change who, for the sake of family harmony, but also have to compromise, also lazy to dispute.

When the emotion comes up again, the red-faced ground hastily argues two sentences, is too much concern and hold down the emotion, turn back to lean against the back silently digest their emotions.

In fact, contradictions are still there, and accumulated one by one, so this is not a process of resentment in the heart, to the end is not collapse or outbreak. And then, each other to find a chance to make up, and finally when there is conflict, even the interest to vent out, do not vent to continue to accumulate resentment in the heart, until complete burnout and numbness.

When the husband and wife come to this step, a certain kind of belief also life is worn out almost, also began to compromise to life, and then formed a silent tacit understanding, you assume your responsibility, I assume my responsibility, make do with the days go on.

When starting to put life in the first place, the emotional situation has made two people indifferent, the life course of Chinese couples.In fact, no matter who you marry, most can not escape such a life trajectory, and even the "make do" of the stepfamily is more cold and realistic, although it can not be generalized.Because no matter who you marry, you will not be completely fit, absolutely fit, and the heart has a point, really like the fate of Chinese marriage.If contradiction is necessary, no one can change who (human nature is stubborn, follow their own ideas, interests, will, stand), then the key point to break the game, do not want to change the other side, only manage their own, and through empathy thinking more pity on the other side's difficulties.Perhaps this is life, life brings people helpless, helpless, boring, obviously don't want to be led by life, and have to be led by life.Chinese marriage, from love to make do, have experienced what, nothing more than this.

02

As long as it is a person, there is a heart will be tired, and then caused by burnout does not matter psychological, casual marriage and feelings of the trend, began to hold a natural attitude, when the husband and wife even don't bother to quarrel, then this is a very dangerous signal.It also means that couples communicate less, less and less.Just like many middle-aged couples, may still be able to ensure communication in life, but it is only because of life, have to communicate, lack of heart-to-heart communication.Life has pressed people breathless, want to take into account the feelings and contradictions, energy is also Teng out, what is a kind of feeling? I'm very, very tired.So what do we tell ourselves afterwards? Three words. Forget it.Ideal marriage, mutual perfection; The reality of marriage, endure loneliness.

Maybe we've had countless negative thoughts and doubts about our partners and our choices, about what we don't have, about what we don't like, but does that mean that our feelings are real? No, only when we lose, will know how to cherish, will regret not to cherish.

Only when you really lose, can you know the importance of your partner, can you understand the existence of your partner, it is a happiness that deserves gratitude and gratitude.

But before this, there are few people who can do to cherish, even if they have heard more reason, advice, and write more than two words to cherish. This is what people are like. What they lack is not truth, but experience, emotion, state of mind and feeling.

But then no amount of tears and remorse, but also Lian not regret medicine.

People who think about life and fear it may be better to cherish it more when they have it. As for those ignorant and fearless people, they are always difficult to wake up at the last moment, immersed in their own world, unrestrained and indulged in their own behavior, and finally regret the way they have gone.

03

Sometimes, will feel so happy marriage, although nothing is necessary to get through marriage, but the most precious feelings, only through marriage to produce; However, there are also times when marriage feels so sad and contrary to the ideal.

Maybe this is the real life of marriage, can not accept its sad side, two people can not continue.

The killer of marriage, always is not an affair, but time, is the so-called, the source of marriage is love, but marriage is not equal to love, some people lost love in marriage, some people buried in marriage.

In fact, the biggest problem is the problem of "people", have, never know how to cherish, always fight for their own interests, always stand in their own position, but people have such stubborn, and then meet another person, contradiction will always happen, the contradiction of two people.

If love is a natural attribute of people, then burnout is also, will be unbridled, will be casual, will be numb, will be bored. Although people are like this, but people can not be changed, can only see our own restraint to their own extent, and whether they are willing to restrain themselves.

Take care of yourself, these four words are too important, compared to those skills that you have mastered, because skills are a kind of skillful force, only from your own start, can you fundamentally solve the problem, avoid the problem. All problems are people's problems, to understand the problems of people, on the road of marriage can get twice the result with half the effort, never because of life and forget to love and be loved, and love and be loved is everyone to master, rather than only love, or only waiting to be loved. In real life, love is always irrelevant, but for some core contradictions, only love can counter and reverse the possibility.