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Avoiding Avoidance: Two Keys to Maintaining Healthy Relationships

Respond and Address The Difficult

By Louis Morris-Relationship/Life CoachPublished 3 years ago 5 min read

“Nothing in life is more important than the ability to communicate effectively.” ~ Gerald R. Ford

The Importance of Communication in Relationships

Communication is the foundation of every healthy relationship. It involves conveying one’s thoughts, feelings and needs to another person, and it’s essential for building intimacy, trust, and love. Communication also helps partners to resolve conflicts, make decisions together, and feel heard and valued.

Communication is the key to maintaining a healthy union. It’s crucial to use all available communication channels to nurture a strong connection but to avoid overusing them, which can lead to issues such as dependency or unnecessary conflicts.

When it comes to communication in relationships, listening is just as important as speaking. Giving each other full attention, being present, and having an open mind are all critical. It’s also important to be empathetic which involves understanding the other person’s perspective, feelings, and needs.

Avoiding communication, or avoiding the person you’re in a relationship with, can be detrimental to your connection. Avoiding your partner can cause misunderstandings, mistrust, and resentment. Being honest and direct about one’s feelings is key to avoiding misunderstandings.

At times, difficult conversations cannot be avoided. It’s important to handle these conversations productively. One way to do so is to avoid being confrontational or accusatory. Instead, using “I” statements to express one’s feelings, needs, and wants can be very effective in these conversations.

“I” statements help to prevent the other person from feeling attacked and encourage them to listen and understand the situation. Also, it’s important to understand their partner’s communication style to improve their relationship. Often, conflict arises because partners have different communication styles.

Some people tend to be more direct and assertive, while others are more passive and emotional. Understanding each other’s communication styles helps to navigate disagreements and conflicts more effectively.

Communication is 90% of the relationship. Therefore, avoiding communication or difficult conversations can cause irreparable damage, while effective communication builds trust, intimacy, and love.

The Dangers of Avoidance in Relationships

Relationships are not complicated, but they do require effort to maintain them. Communication is a critical element that fosters trust, intimacy, and love in any relationship. However, when it comes to avoiding conversations, it can deal a significant blow.

Avoidance can take different forms, including ignoring calls, messages, or texts, like ghosting. By avoiding a partner, one misses the opportunity to connect and nurture the union. Avoidance of difficult conversations is equally problematic. Delaying conversations to a later date is acceptable if one partner is not in the right mood to talk.

However, burying such conversations altogether is not healthy. In many ways, relationships are like businesses. They require having difficult conversations in order to grow and make progress. In relationships, it is crucial to handle difficult conversations productively in the right frame of mind.

The intention is equally crucial when having tough conversations. Stay away from adding negative ingredients to such discussions, as this can be harmful to the relationship’s progress. Handle conversations with the right intention and avoid negativity, as this can create long-term damage.

By avoiding avoidance and difficult conversations, healthy and fruitful relationships can be developed. Avoidance can create a wedge between partners and could possibly cause the end of the relationship. By having open communication and fostering difficult conversations without negativity, couples can create long-lasting and sustainable connections.

Ultimately, relationships require significant effort, and avoiding avoidance and difficult conversations is a crucial step toward creating a strong and lasting connection.

The Benefits of Handling Difficult Conversations Productively

In any relationship, difficult conversations are inevitable. They can arise from simple misunderstandings or more significant issues that require increased attention. Regardless, how individuals handle these conversations can either make or break the relationship. Handling difficult conversations constructively and effectively can lead to several benefits.

One of the primary advantages of handling difficult conversations productively is that it strengthens the relationship. When individuals express their thoughts and feelings honestly, it increases trust and intimacy.

Sharing disagreements or concerns openly creates an environment where both parties can express themselves freely, leading to a deeper understanding and connection. Additionally, productive conversations pave the way for problem-solving.

When issues are ignored or not voiced clearly, they often escalate, resulting in more significant problems. When individuals handle challenging situations effectively, they create room for solutions. Productive discussions enable individuals to work together and find a resolution that works best for both parties.

Moreover, productive conversations promote growth and development. When individuals express their perspectives honestly, it leads to emotional growth and maturity. Each conversation creates an opportunity to learn how to handle difficult situations and identify opportunities to improve oneself.

On the contrary, avoiding challenging conversations tends to create more problems. When individuals avoid difficult conversations, it can lead to misunderstandings, unresolved issues, and negative emotions that fester over time. This avoidance can also lead to resentment and hostility, which can damage the relationship irreparably.

Overall, individuals should recognize that difficult conversations are an essential aspect of any healthy relationship. Honest and open communication is necessary to establish and maintain a strong, lasting connection. While handling difficult conversations requires effort and vulnerability, it’s an essential step toward building a positive relationship.

Tips for Developing and Maintaining Healthy Relationships

1. Open and Honest Communication

Communication is one of the essential elements in creating and maintaining a healthy union. To enhance communication, partners need to ask open-ended questions and listen actively. Listening to your partner without interrupting or getting defensive promotes trust and understanding in a relationship.

2. Avoidance is a Relationship Killer

Avoiding a partner can lead to significant relationship problems. Avoiding a partner can make them feel neglected and unloved, hindering the creation of a deep emotional connection. Always be present and in the moment, even when conversing through digital channels like text or chat.

3. Handle Difficult Conversations with Care

Difficult conversations can be uncomfortable and stressful, but they’re critical in any relationship. Handle problematic conversations with patience, understanding, and kindness. The goal of difficult conversations should always be to solve problems together and not to prove a point or win an argument.

4. Show Appreciation and Gratitude

Appreciation and gratitude are powerful tools for maintaining a healthy relationship. It’s important to acknowledge and appreciate each other’s efforts and achievements, no matter how small. Expressing gratitude regularly promotes positivity and kindness, leading to a happier and more fulfilling union.

5. Embrace Change and Growth

In any relationship, change and growth are inevitable. Partners need to embrace change and growth and view them as opportunities. This may involve learning new things together or trying new experiences as a couple.

With open and honest communication, avoiding avoidance, respectfully handling difficult conversations, showing appreciation and gratitude, and embracing change and growth, partners can cultivate a strong and lasting connection. Remember to nurture your relationship regularly, invest sufficient effort, and seek help when necessary.

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About the Creator

Louis Morris-Relationship/Life Coach

Relationship Coach 🖤 Host of The Heart Matters podcast 🎧 I help couples and single navigate their relationship matters from the heart. It's the heart that learns, loves, and attracts. #1 On WPMinds Relationship Coaches to watch in 2022

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