Are There Benefits To Getting Married Later In Life?

Marriage is one of the biggest milestones of our lives. It signifies a time of being a fully-fledged adult wanting to leave the parental nest and start one's own family. It also provides some security, entitlement and legal privileges which are not available to single people. Up to 50 years ago, Gretna Green in Scotland did brisk business with 16 year olds, and under, eloping to the famous location to get married without parental consent. Many girls were eager to tie the knot to escape parental consent, especially as there were few other options for them than keeping a household.

Today the story is very different. According to Statista, in the 1990s, the average age for getting married in the UK was 28 years old for men and 26 years for women. The latest averages are nearly 40 years old for men and 37 years for women. It seems that the high cost of living, the inability to get on the housing ladder, and increased career advantages are keeping people at home with parents so that couples are taking this major step much later in their lives.

So are there real benefits in marrying later? Personally, I can see a few main ones for you:

• Having had some experience of life, especially finding out what makes you happy, and what works for you, you are in a better position to judge when you have met the right partner, because your needs and top priorities are likely to be different from someone younger. You are also likely to be more confident and mature in making that choice.

• Not being starry eyed about the romantic process, decisions can be less impulsive and more measured. Experience and maturity also offer greater flexibility for doing whatever you wish at that stage in your life.

• There will be no small kids to restrain your mobility, to eat into your income, or for you to be anxious about. If you have older children they are likely to accept your new partner, especially if they all get on well together.

• Sex is likely to be much better because you would have learned by trial and error. As you might not be too fearful of any unwanted pregnancy, intercourse is likely to be far more enjoyable because of the reduced anxieties.

• You are likely to be more tolerant of each other, to make allowances because of your experiences, rather than when you were younger and might have been pre-occupied with the fantasy of the ideal romance which encouraged you to expect perfection in each other.

• You are more likely to achieve your dreams, and have someone who will encourage you rather than compete with you. There is likely to be greater understanding between you for individual objectives because of your maturity and focused aspirations.

• You are likely to have far greater flexibility in what you wish to do with each other: whether travel, start a business, chase your dreams or be artistic, because of mutual support in your endeavours. Having waited so long to take these decisions, you will be feeling greater confidence in carrying them out, and not plagued by the self-doubt of youth.

• Most important, you will see the world, your romance, your spouse and your life differently from when you were younger, and that will impact on how successful your relationship becomes. In fact, you are likely to invest far more into the partnership to ensure that it works due to a variety of factors and insecurities that might reveal themselves at that later stage in your life.

The biggest benefits to marrying later is the maturity and confidence to make the right decisions and to ensure that they work for you.

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