Weight Loss

My weight has always been a problem for me. I was always the "fat" friend. My weight never affected the way I lived until I got to high school because I started a new school without any of my friends. During my freshman year I found my group of friends but again, I was still the "fat" friend. I was confident in myself but knew my weight held me back from my full potential. I wouldn't post full body pictures because I did not want people to see what I looked like. I also only ever wore leggings and baggy shirts to hide my stomach. I knew I wanted to lose weight but didn't know where to start. I didn't have money for the gym or to buy better foods. All of my friends would eat whatever they wanted and did not gain any weight. "Why can't I be like that?" I constantly thought to myself. Toward the end of my freshman year, I started to look into different fad diets but I was too picky of an eater to do any of them–then, I found the apple and carrots diet. It consisted of just those two things–for three days all I ate was apples and carrots and was drinking water to keep myself full because I was practically starving myself.

Although in those three days I lost weight, I gained it all back when I started to eat real foods again. From then on I decided that if someone has a problem with my weight then that is their problem. By the end of my sophomore year, my parents decided we were going to move, which meant I would have to start at a new school again. Except this time when I moved schools, I wasn't confident in myself, I didn't want to be "fat" anymore. I was fed up with being tired when I walked up the stairs or when I walked from class to class. But still, even this time, I did not know where to start, I researched all different types of diets and was constantly getting messages from people trying to sell me Herbalife or Shakeology. Of course, I was interested in anything that people told me would help me lose all the weight I wanted, simply by incorporating a few shakes into my day; but again, I did not have the money to buy the shakes. At this point though, I had access to the gym where I lived for free so I would go for an hour a couple of days a week and started cutting out carbs. Even after all the effort I was putting in, I started to get lazy and wanted to eat the cookies and snacks that my school sold at lunch or the foods that people brought in for parties.

During my senior year is when it finally hit me that I need to get serious about losing weight if I don't want to suffer when I get older. I joined a gym since we moved out of the condo we rented, and I no longer could go to the gym for free. Luckily I went on home instruction during my senior year so I was able to make some money to buy groceries and was able to go to the gym while everyone was in school. I kept up with low carb/keto diet because I found that that's what worked best for me. In just three weeks I was able to lose 20 pounds and go down a pant size. I was the smallest I had been in as long as I could remember. I managed to keep up with the weight loss because I started driving, so I could take myself to the gym and started working so that I could buy full groceries and not just little things every once in awhile.

Although I was able to keep up with the weight loss when I first started college that fall after high school, I eventually fell off and would buy the garbage food from my school instead of opting for a salad or some vegetables.

And here I am today still on my journey to being a better version of myself. I am not giving up on myself because I know what I am capable of doing.