How to Find the Right Companion Assistant as a Senior

1. Empathy – Take time to have a real conversation

The first thing to look for in a companion assistant is empathy. Does the person truly listen to you? Do they understand what you’re trying to say, even when you don’t express it perfectly? A good way to check is to simply talk with them, calmly and openly. Tell them a story, ask a question, mention a concern. See how they react. The right person won’t rush you — they’ll listen attentively, with kindness, and make you feel heard.

2. Reliability – Choose someone with a stable and regular schedule

As we get older, routines matter. A companion who cancels often, shows up late, or changes hours all the time can create unnecessary stress. Ask the assistant about their availability. Are they open to visiting on the same days and at the same times every week? Stability is comforting — it brings peace of mind and helps you feel secure.

3. Respect – Pay attention to how they speak to you

A good companion assistant never talks to an older adult like a child. Their tone should be calm, normal, and respectful. They look you in the eye, don’t interrupt, and always ask before touching your belongings. They treat you as a full person — with your own story, choices, and dignity. This kind of respect is often obvious right from the first meeting.

4. Authenticity – Don’t look for perfection, look for a real connection

Some people may have perfect résumés, but little warmth or sincerity. Others may have fewer qualifications but are naturally friendly, cheerful, and open-hearted. Don’t just focus on diplomas or formal training. Trust how you feel. If you enjoy the conversation and feel at ease, that’s a strong signal that the person might be a good fit.

5. Adaptability – Try a real-life situation together

Before committing, invite the person for a short test moment: a walk, a tea, or a few hours at home. This helps you see how they adapt to your pace and your preferences. A good assistant won’t push or rush you — they’ll follow your rhythm and make you feel supported.

6. Motivation – Ask why they chose this line of work

It matters why someone wants to work as a companion assistant. Is it just a job, or is there a deeper reason? Don’t hesitate to ask directly. The best people will speak with sincerity — maybe they’ve helped an elderly relative before or have a real passion for this kind of care. Their motivation should come from the heart.

7. Proximity – Choose someone who lives nearby

Someone who lives close to you is more likely to be punctual and available, even when the weather is bad or transport is disrupted. Living nearby also builds a sense of familiarity. Ask local places — your town hall, pharmacy, or senior center — for suggestions. Often, the right person is just around the corner.

8. Shared interests – Find someone with common hobbies

Whether you enjoy cooking, music, gardening, or card games, try to mention these during the search. If the assistant shares or appreciates your interests, your time together will be more enjoyable and meaningful. You don’t need to be identical — but having something in common makes it easier to connect.

9. Use trusted platforms – Avoid unknown or unverified sources

There are secure websites that specialize in connecting seniors with reliable assistants. These platforms often include reviews, background checks, and support. If needed, ask a family member to help you navigate them. Avoid using websites or ads that seem vague or unprofessional — your safety comes first.

10. Trial and feedback – It’s okay to say no

Even if everything seems perfect on paper, it might not feel right once things begin. And that’s okay. You’re never stuck. If something bothers you — a tone, a habit, or a lack of connection — you have every right to change your mind. This is your life, and you deserve someone who truly suits you. Keep looking until you find that person.

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Final Words

Choosing a companion assistant when you’re very elderly can feel overwhelming. But with these 10 simple and practical tips, you’re better prepared to make the right choice. Don’t rush. Take your time. Be honest with yourself. This person will share part of your daily life — you deserve to feel comfortable, respected, and understood.

Remember: the choice belongs to you. Your feelings matter. Your comfort matters. And there is someone out there who will bring you peace, companionship, and a better quality of life.