Go. the F***. to Sleep.

Why is it so hard to get enough sleep? It's supposed to be as simple as closing your eyes, but more and more, it feels like it takes effort. We all have our reasons why we just can't get enough of it, so what do we do now?

I was 25 years old when I was finally diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. As most sufferers can understand, I was lucky if I ever got more than 3-4 hours of sleep every night. But thankfully, my diagnosis gave me the opportunity to be medicated for both mood regulation and sleep. Now, you might be thinking that prescription pills are the answer, but chemically enhanced medication will not fulfill you with vital energy, better clarity and add to an overall long-lasting sense of wellbeing. As a grateful and deep lover of self-care, this will become your favorite resolution - Goodnight, 2021 and HELLO, 2022 and beyond!

The beautiful relief about our differences is that you can customize your routine to whatever suits your needs. And luckily, there are many ideas to choose from! First, let's call out these bad habits as they really are.

THE SNEAKY SEVEN: "LIMIT ___ TO AT LEAST ONE-TWO HOURS BEFORE BEDTIME."

Because let's be real... you'd have to have the epitome of discipline to completely cut off all your old habits an hour or two before bed!

1. LIMIT THE NUMBER AND LONGEVITY OF YOUR NAPS DURING THE DAY. Ideally, a 20-minute nap should be enough to power off that will also reup your energy. But realistically, many of us require 10+ minutes to even fall asleep. One thing for sure though is that frequent naps that are 30 minutes or longer will keep your brain thinking that it already had enough rest during the day and therefore doesn't need more rest at night. So don't completely cut out naps - they are surprisingly very healthy and even necessary to your day! Instead, set your timer differently, pick a reasonable time of day (preferably in the afternoon) to rest and make continuous efforts to follow a different routine.

2. LIMIT YOUR TV USAGE. Even go as far as turning the volume down low and adjusting the brightness to a dimmer visual as well. These simple tricks will keep your attention span from bouncing from one thought to another as television often triggers contemplation and imagination anyway. You want to watch shows or movies that have low emotional and psychological impact as well as lower action-packed scenes or else these will keep you in your thoughts or get your adrenaline pumping.

3. LIMIT YOUR PHONE/LAPTOP USAGE. Studies have shown that it's not so much the notification itself that triggers the "reward" system of dopamine activation in our brains but rather the sound of the notification that gets us excited and jumping to every opportunity to grab that phone. Instead, turn the ringer low or put it on silent and vibrate to keep you from putting that adrenaline into drive. Opt for setting your notifications without previews as well.

4. LIMIT YOUR ERRANDS, HARD LABOR AND PHYSICAL ACTIVITY. You'd think that wearing the body down would tire you out, but this is not necessarily true. Every part of the body operates in its own system; therefore, just because your muscular system is ready for rest, this does not mean that a highly active digestive system would not keep you wide awake. For some people, physical activity before bed does the trick. But for the deep thinkers, vivid dreamers and anyone else in between, any physical activity can keep the brain thinking that the work must go on. This is why evolution developed our internal clocks to rise at sun up and rest at sun down, and it's because we have the sunlight to do the labors that need to be done but the moonlight to reflect on the day and relax. So if you're going to keep laboring before bed, then keep it at minimal-effort tasks.

5. LIMIT TIME AND DEDICATION TO EXCESSIVELY PLANNING THE FUTURE. The simple fact is that your future does not exist yet but is filled with many possibilities of how it will pan out. That little snippet of information is even a core principle in the popular philosophy of Buddhism. We cannot control what happens next which is why we plan as much as we can. And it's clever, of course! Planning creates precautions and step-by-step preparations as well as promotes ideas and decision-making while it also prevents procrastination or completely blanking out at a time that you need to be active. However, "too much of a good thing can be a bad thing." In this case, excessive planning before bedtime may affect how soon you get to sleep, how long you stay asleep and even how you dream. Sometimes, excessive planning triggers anxious preoccupation. So if you need to plan, then keep your thoughts in a journal with a kind reminder written below every anticipated idea that you must savor the present before you are ready for your best future.

6. LIMIT HOW LATE YOU STAY UP. It's a no-brainer! Everyone's schedule is different. In fact, some people reading this might actually work second or third-shift jobs which switches their internal clocks and therefore, alters how well this advice integrates into their lives. Regardless, new habits start with new routines and likewise, pushing yourself past a reasonable bedtime may frustrate or further complicate your brain and body's functioning. Try for a bedtime that will get you 6-8 hours of sleep. This is the ideal time that replenishes the way your systems work.

7. This final message will be different from the rest... CUT OUT SUGARS AND CAFFEINE BEFORE BED. It's one of the most challenging habits to kick to the side. For many of us, food gives us pleasure and comfort but we need to pick healthier options if we are going to eat before bed. Someone once told me that the Western diet is backwards according to her upbringing. She is a licensed Nurse Practitioner from India who advises that we eat our biggest meal at dinnertime rather than eat what Americans often refer to as a "big breakfast." She continued to advise that we eat a light lunch with small snacks throughout the day but that a big dinner will make you drowsy at a time most appropriate for rest. However, our diets must be balanced with nutritious foods; otherwise, a big dinner full of unhealthy foods will be counteractive to your goal. Furthermore, it's best to eat dinner two-three hours before bedtime so your body has plenty of time to process and hopefully benefit from these foods. But as far as sugars and caffeine goes, they obviously keep you up and therefore should be replaced with drinks and foods that enhance your sleep.

THE TRANSCENDENT TEN: "WHAT YOU NEED NOW IN YOUR LIFE IS TO ___"

1. KEEP YOUR LIVING/SLEEPING SPACE CLEAN. Whether by my own nature or by the unsettling conditions of the house that often set off my very explosive father, I grew up with a highly disciplined way of keeping things clean and tidy. In fact, since I was eight or nine years old, I have actually suffered from a subtype of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder that involves symmetry, perfectionism, cleanliness, arrangement and organization. As disruptive it has been in my life, it has also been my saving grace. In the utmost humble way that I can possibly convey this following message, I can confidently say that "cleanliness is next to godliness." In my own way of interpreting that message despite its biblical context, what I really want to express is that a clean space is a clean mind whereas a cluttered space is a cluttered mind. We often do not realize how much we externalize our internal world. An unclean living space, especially in the bedroom, can be distracting for the mind that may even cause disorganization and therefore, an inability to stick to a proper sleeping routine. So keep the unfolded laundry off the bed and the trash in a garbage can!

2. SLEEP IN CLEAN, COMFORTABLE BEDDING THAT IS INVITING. You'd be surprised how much appearance enhances quality of sleep. Wrinkled bedding can leave you tossing and turning while thin or thick blankets may keep you too cold or too hot to sleep. First and foremost, find bedding that is comfortable for your body. Secondly, pick out bedding that you love so much you just can't wait to get to bed! Personally, I have found that warm colors trigger relaxation.

3. DIM THE LIGHTS AND USE LAMPS IN PLACE OF CEILING LIGHTS. Nowadays, LED lights are used more frequently than the soft white lights we are accustomed to. Lighting is very powerful in how it affects your sleep. This goes back to that internal clock regulation. In fact, researchers on the study of the ecological system found that increased LED usage has negatively impacted animal behavior (especially birds) in regards to eating, reproduction, biology and... SLEEP. What's happening is that LED is so bright it tricks animals into thinking that daylight is still going, and it turns out that humans are not much different from animal behavior either. If you are to use LED lights, keep them in porches and garages. Otherwise, dimming your lights influences sleepiness and comfortability and even more, using more lamps instead of ceiling lights at night makes your environments feel less intense.

4. WEAR COMFORTABLE, SLOUCHY LOUNGEWEAR AND PLUSH HOUSE SLIPPERS. I learned early on in high school that what you wear is how you feel. I used to wear pajamas to school before they banned them, but then I wore sweatpants afterward. When I started making efforts for different clothing, I realized that slouchy clothes kept me feeling drowsy throughout the day while the opposite improved my sense of focus and energy. Taking that information into account, I specifically wear thick pajamas, baggy shirts, and soft house slippers to feel relaxed which then promotes sleepiness.

5. MAKE NEW HYGIENE ROUTINES. It might sound strange to think that a hygiene routine will benefit your quality of sleep. What I have found is that incorporating just one small routine, such as applying a facial cleanser or exfoliating in a scented body scrub, can signal messages to the brain that you are ready to wind down and preparing for rest. Furthermore, a hygiene routine overall just makes you feel good about taking care of your body and feeling satisfied before bed is the best sensation for turning your brain off.

6. DRINK AND TAKE PART IN HOT THINGS. From personal experience, this is my absolute favorite thing to partake in at night! Hot baths, hot tea, and just recently a hot body massager all improve my sleep every single night. That's because heat at a certain time before bed changes the blood flow and body temperature. When your blood flow is slower and your body temperature subdued, your body will naturally become quieter. We need peace and quiet to get a good night's sleep!

7. READ. It's not everyone's cup of tea, but you don't have to strictly read books nor do you have to replace your favorite pastimes either. If you have a blog site or news site that you enjoy, reading more before bed reduces stress and tends to slow your mind down due to it being a generally calm activity. However, watch out for the articles that do trigger your stress and anxiety. Just as the shows and movies you watch affect your thinking, reading something intense, visceral, or deeply thought-provoking can block your ability to get to sleep faster. So make sure you pick the things that decrease your impulse to comment or post.

8. DO LIGHT YOGA. Most people tend to think of yoga as stretching but these two are actually very different. The purpose of stretching is to promote flexibility and alleviate lactic acid buildup. If you've ever stretched out and felt more energized afterward, this is because stretching has "awakened" your muscles. On the other hand, yoga is an ancient practice that centers on spiritual health. Its purpose is to bring your attention to the inside of your body, how your body moves and how it all affects your functionality. For example, yoga teaches its students to 'move with the breath' so as to practice harmoniousness and balance. When we are in harmony and balance, then we are at peace and calm which is what we need to have a better night's sleep. But more importantly, practice the poses that are specific to relaxation. A sequence of these specific poses will provide almost immediate effects and also long-term wellbeing.

9. MEDITATE. If you think that the purpose of meditation is to 'clear your mind,' then you are mistaken as most of us beginners are! The true purpose of meditation is to observe our thoughts in a non-judgmental way. The more you practice this skill, the more that you will experience natural clarity. Meditation is perfect for the deep thinkers, overly active imaginations, fluctuating emotions and excessive planners. Start with 10 minutes before bed every night and gradually build up to 20 or 30 minutes. You will find that not only does meditation improve your quality of sleep but goes well into how you live your next day. It often takes much time to reach that nirvana everyone is looking for, but just a small step will add to your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health.

10. JOURNAL YOUR THOUGHTS AND EVEN YOUR ENTIRE DAY. It seems that emotions are the most difficult things to allow and process, but why is that? It's because we live in a cruel world viciously dominated by the notion that emotionality is either secondary to logic or unnecessary to begin with. We tend to look at emotions as distracting and therefore, unwanted. But what are our dreams most dominantly affected by? It's by how we feel! We have to express these feelings or else they block our ability to see a clearer picture of the reality of ourselves, others and life itself. If being emotionally open with others makes you feel uncomfortable, then turn to a personal journal. The most important rule to journaling though is to be totally and completely honest with yourself. Notice how you are writing to no one but your self. We show love and acceptance to ourselves with the integrity of honesty. We owe it to ourselves to be truthful. On days that have been long and challenging or even average and boring, don't just listen to your thoughts - look at your thoughts! This is where awareness and change begins and releasing those emotions is vital to consistently healthier rest.

GO THE F*** TO SLEEP.

Forreal this time.

Try new things but be patient with change. Switch up your routine every once in a while but be creative about it.

And if you ever wondered why sleep is so important, it's important because it's the most uninterrupted time for healing. So let your body do what is was always meant to do by starting with a commitment to a personalized, everyday practice!