Don't Fall For This Shopping Site

I should have known better

When a deal is too good to be true, there's always a catch. You'd think that with my wisdom and experience I'd be too savvy to fall for the siren song of those online clothes retailers' ads that pop up when I'm researching or reading the news.

But my love of clothes far outstrips my budget, so when beguiling photos of outfits - each costing less than a couple of decent cocktails - divert my attention from worthier pursuits, I'm an easy fish to hook.

Especially right now, when my son's destination wedding is coming up. Sure, I want to write the Great American Novel, but I need fabulous resort wear, STAT. And I don't have a lot of spare change at the moment to fund my new look.

Of course, the evil algorithmic elves that patrol the Interwebs are aware of this. Hence the barrage of shiny, cheap, couture enticements that succeeded, far too easily, in wearing down my resistance.

I'm usually a conscious consumer

I research household products and eschew harmful chemicals, scents, and unnecessary packaging. I buy local whenever it's feasible, and choose organic produce, sustainably farmed coffee and chocolate, and free-range, humanely raised eggs and meat. The extra cost is a wise investment in the long run and makes me feel that I'm at least doing something to soften my impact on the Earth and its denizens.

As for clothing, my favorite kind of shopping is in consignment stores. When I've got the time to devote to thrifting, I love finding bargains on barely-or-never worn fashions that another woman has deleted from her closet. It's a win-win, in my view, and again reduces my planetary footprint.

Finding a perfect-fitting pair of $100 Lululemon yoga pants, in great condition, for $8 - now, that's a thrill.

I admit to my weakness

Like I said, with a major event coming up, I feel the extra impetus to look as good as I can manage - yet I'm still reluctant to venture into a mall in these not-really-over-Covid-days. The sharpshooters of online marketing found, in me, a sitting duck.

You may have heard of a certain clothing site — whose name rhymes with "Bora Bora" — or you may have seen its pop-up ads. Worn down by their relentless and alluring marketing, I finally caved and dove down the rabbit hole.

The dress was so reasonable (a euphemism for suspiciously cheap) and it looked so good in the photos, and the reviews were all positive. Also, there were a few other items I couldn't resist: some black linen pants, a colorful top that would go with other stuff I have. I placed an order.

And then I waited. And waited.

First, my order never showed up

I'd gotten the standard order confirmation and assurance when my stuff shipped out. But afterwards, crickets. A couple of weeks after I should have received my package, I investigated - only to find that the company had shipped to my previous address.

Thus began my first experience of their customer service, which consists entirely of live chat — there was no phone number available no matter how much I searched. The company's mailing address was in the UK, which I'd found reassuring, but as I delved further I found out it was actually located in Hong Kong. Why keep that secret?

This is when things got complicated. I will spare you the details, but my first live chat resulted in the representative blaming me for putting in the wrong address and telling me it was up to me to contact the post office and have the shipment redirected.

I did that. It took several searches and phone calls. The post office said, as that it is unable to readdress packages, and since the parcel was unclaimed it had been returned to the sender.

Back I went to Live Chat

I ended up with a different Chatter, so had to explain the whole situation again, with the addition of the intelligence from USPS. "So the package has been returned to you," I typed, "and I am requesting a refund."

Silence ensued. After several minutes the dancing bubbles presaged the return of my Chatter, who informed me in idiosyncratic English that the package had not returned to the company itself but to "a shipping facility" and there was now no way to track it.

We went back and forth on this, but the upshot was that the very best the company could do was to offer me a 35% refund. Take it or leave it.

I took it, chalking up the rest to tuition

Never again, I assured myself. Some ten days later, the wee refund showed up in my credit card account, and I assumed the matter was closed, the expensive lesson learned.

But late last week, I received another alert from the same retailer: a shipment was on its way! This was confounding, as I had certainly not ordered anything else from the company.

I checked on the alleged shipment and was plunged into a retail labyrinth. There was my original order, only now with two additional items that had mysteriously appeared - one of which I had, according to the company, received, and one that was now included in the items for which I'd been partially refunded.

AND they were sending me a dress I'd never ordered.

Descending into the next circle of Hell

I initiated another Live Chat. It was even less satisfying than the first one, but this time I discovered the elusive button that allowed me to request a transcript if the chat was officially concluded. Join me on my recent journey to the retail underworld:

Chat transcript

Name: (Mine) (Email redacted)

Order Number: HBPT01138993

Question: I just got an email from you saying you're shipping me the "Casual V Neck Cotton Blends Sleeveless Knit Dress" - but I never ordered that item and I don't want it. Also you indicated that under "Sub-order 5521618 I received and pair of "Linen Solid Casual Pants" - I never ordered those and I haven't received them.

(Chat Person, name redacted) Sat, 04/02/22 10:19:40 am America/Boise Hi, we have received your message. Please give us a moment so that we could check for you.

. . .

This is what you've ordered, please confirm: Casual V Neck Cotton Blends Sleeveless Knit Dress is as below

(Me, wishing I'd had more coffee) 10:21:58 am I have NOT ordered the white linen pants, the sleeveless knit dress nor the white long-sleeve top. I looked at them but did NOT order them.  

(Chat Person) 10:23:05 am Did you refer to these 3 items? (accompanied by a screenshot of their record of the order)

(Me, wondering if I've slipped into a timewarp) 10:23:35 am Yes. Those are the items that are showing up as ordered but I didn't order them.

(Chat Person)10:25:22 am Probably you accidentally added them to your cart when you placed your order

(Me, suppressing the urge to say, "Oh, of course, just like I brushed my teeth last night with eyelash adhesive") 10:25:45 am I highly doubt that. I reviewed my order and it didn't contain those items. 

(Chat Person) 10:26:12 am Casual V Neck Cotton Blends Sleeveless Knit Dress was shipped on April 2, we'll try to stop the shipment. If the package is intercepted successfully we'll cancel it and offer you full refund 

(Me, wondering if they're going to send out unmarked black vans to hijack some poor postal worker) 10:27:00 am Okay, but what about the other two items? And if the package is NOT intercepted successfully, then what? 

. . .

(Chat Person) 10:27:52 am you can return it for full refund after you receive it. the white top is in the undeliverable package and you have accepted 35% refund for it

(Me, after counting to ten) 10:29:14 am What about the white linen pants that you show I received but I haven't? And I NEVER ordered the white long-sleeved top. Please flag my account so that you don't ship me anything else in the future. Going forward, I will dispute any charges from Noracora with my credit card company. And I'm sorry you have to work for this company.

. . .

- For the pants, it could not be delivered successfully due to address issue. The white top has been offered 35% refund before.In this case, we can offer 50% refund for the pants and another 15% refund for the white top to you what do you think? 

(Me, repressing the urge to say, "What do you think I think? That's I'm just fine with paying for items that apparently don't even exist?") 10:35:51 am It's infuriating that I have to pay half for pants I never ordered or received. I understand this isn't your personal fault, but it's dishonest business practices. Is there anything else you can do? 

. . .

(Chat Person) 10:37:42 am this is the only offer I can give now. You have a chance to get full refund of the blue dress, we'll contact shipping courier to stop the shipment 

(Me, wondering if I'm talking to the Godfather of live chatters, who has just made me an offer I can't refuse) 10:38:11 am Then please initiate the refund, and stop shipment of the blue dress. 

(Chat Person) 10:38:55 am no problem.We will offer 50% refund for the pants and another 15% refund for the white top to you in 1 week I will send you a confirmation email in 12 hours 

(Me, wondering what else they might decide I've bought that I haven't) 10:39:27 am Okay. Can you also make a note so that you do NOT ship me anything else? I will not be ordering anything from your company going forward 

(Chat Person) 10:42:32 am Okay, we will 

(Me, just wanting this to be over, for real) 10:42:42 am Thank you.We are concluding the chat now, correct? 

(Chat Person) 10:44:20 am correct 

(Me, weak with relief) 10:44:48 am Okay, signing off 

Duration: 1h 3m 14s

Another hour of my life I won't get back

I blame myself. But I also blame the perfidious practices of The Company Whose Name Rhymes With Bora Bora. Fellow shoppers, be not led astray by their flashy ads; spare yourself the misery and expense.

Consider yourself warned.

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