Why Does Success Feel So Elusive?

December 18, 2024 - 2:22 PM

Life can often feel like a tapestry woven with threads of hope, frustration, and resilience. For Maya, today was one of those days where the threads seemed more tangled than usual. Sitting quietly in her room, she whispered a heartfelt prayer. “Jehovah, I come to you through Jesus,” she began, her voice steady despite the turmoil inside. “Let your kingdom come, let your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. I pray everything in accordance with your will.”

Maya’s prayer was her anchor, a way to steady herself in a storm of emotions. Today wasn’t a particularly bad day, but it wasn’t great either. Her mind was clouded by lingering thoughts about Malik, a man she had once envisioned a future with. Slowly but surely, she was coming to terms with the painful reality that Malik might one day move on and offer someone else all the love and care she had yearned for. The thought gnawed at her, but it no longer consumed her as it had the week before. The pain was still there, a dull ache, but it was manageable.

“It’s crazy,” she thought to herself, “how even with everything I have going on, like planning the anniversary party and setting up the new phones, Malik is still on my mind.” The party she was organizing for her parents’ milestone anniversary should have been her sole focus, a joyous distraction. Yet, the mental chatter persisted, pulling her attention away from the tasks at hand.

Financial struggles added another layer of stress to her life. Maya had been without a stable income for months, and the prospects for change seemed bleak. “I don’t know if I can do another month of this,” she admitted to herself. “Another year feels unimaginable.”

Yesterday, a glimmer of hope had appeared in the form of an interview invitation. However, upon closer inspection, it seemed like a scam.

The disappointment hit hard. “I don’t think I’ll be applying to any more jobs this year,” she resolved, the weight of discouragement pressing down on her. “If I’m still alive next year, maybe then I’ll try again.”

Maya often wondered if her prayers were truly heard. “Do you even understand how I feel?” she asked Jehovah in her mind. “Why is it that I’m not making any sales? Why does survival feel impossible?” She imagined a different reality, one where she could plan a vacation to ring in the new year, order new outfits, and treat herself to spa days. Instead, her current reality felt like a relentless grind with no reprieve.

“I wanted so badly to fly out right after the party,” she thought wistfully. “But things don’t work out for people like me. I always said that, and now I’m starting to believe it’s true.”

Adding to her frustration was Malik’s apparent success. “He’s making money left and right,” she fumed silently, “and he’s out there on social media saying things like, ‘If Jesus came back as a creative.’ Isn’t that blasphemous?” Meanwhile, she hadn’t seen a substantial amount of money since losing her job months ago. The disparity between their lives stung deeply.

Maya’s gratitude for her previous job couldn’t mask her longing for financial stability. “I’m thankful for the opportunities I had,” she admitted, “but I just wish I could find a steady income. Something to stop this feeling of losing my mind.”

The end of the month loomed, and with it came the same nagging question: “Will this be another month where I don’t earn a single cent?” The thought was suffocating. Making money, something that seemed so straightforward for others, felt like an insurmountable challenge for her. “Why does it have to be so hard?” she lamented. “Why me?”

As her prayer continued, Maya’s voice grew softer, tinged with desperation. “I pray for new income, Jehovah. Stable income. I pray for good mental and emotional health. I want to move on with my life. Please, I need livable wages. When will it be my turn?”

Her thoughts circled back to Malik, and she felt a surge of determination. “I don’t want to think about him anymore,” she declared. “Not for the rest of the day, the week, the month, or even the year. I want peace from him. And please, help me get my money back from Andre. In Jesus’ name, amen.”

Despite her struggles, Maya clung to hope, albeit tenuously. She recognized that her journey wasn’t over and that her prayers were a step toward healing and clarity. The act of speaking her truth, even if only to herself and her Creator, brought a small measure of comfort.

Her parents’ anniversary party was just days away, and she resolved to pour her energy into making it a memorable event. The celebration would bring family and friends together, a much-needed reminder of love and resilience. Maya hoped that the joy of the occasion would temporarily eclipse her worries, giving her a brief respite from the weight she carried.

As the hours ticked by, Maya’s thoughts began to shift. She decided to take small, actionable steps toward reclaiming control over her life. Perhaps she couldn’t solve all her problems overnight, but she could focus on the things within her reach—like creating a budget for the party, reaching out to potential clients, or even just taking a walk to clear her mind.

In the quiet of her room, Maya’s prayer lingered in the air, a testament to her resilience. She didn’t have all the answers, but she had faith. And for now, that was enough to keep her moving forward.