To Whom It May Concern, I'm Done

To Whom It May Concern (and to those who never seemed concerned enough):

Subject: Formal Resignation from the Positions of The Strong One, The Quiet One, and The Person Who Never Says No

Dear Management, Colleagues, Family, Friends, Strangers on the Street, and the Relentless Voice in My Own Head, and anyone else I missed.

Please accept this letter as my official resignation from the following positions, effective immediately and with no intention of serving out any notice: The Strong One, The Quiet One, and The Person Who Never Says No. I understand this may come as a shock to some, a relief to others, and an inconvenience to those who have grown accustomed to my emotional heavy lifting, my silence in the face of chaos, and my unwavering, knee-jerk compliance.

My Job Description (as I have come to know it):

The Strong One: Responsible for always holding it together, regardless of personal cost. Duties include, but are not limited to: swallowing tears, patching up other people’s messes, and being the human equivalent of duct tape in a hurricane.

The Quiet One: Charged with maintaining peace by biting tongue, swallowing opinions, and nodding along to conversations that range from mildly irritating to soul-crushingly infuriating. Must possess the ability to disappear in a crowded room and reappear only when someone else needs a sounding board.

The Person Who Never Says No: Expected to accept all requests, invitations, and emotional labor assignments with a smile. Must be available for last-minute favors, impromptu therapy sessions, and the occasional “Can you just…?” that always turns into a three-hour, high-drama ordeal.

The Balance Sheet:

Assets Contributed:

1. Emotional stability (loaned out, rarely returned)
2. Time (overtime, weekends, holidays, sick days)
3. Energy (renewable, but currently depleted)
4. Opinions (kept in storage, gathering dust)
5. Dreams (on indefinite backorder)

Liabilities Incurred:

1. Chronic exhaustion
2. Resentment (compounded daily)
3. Unspoken words (clogging internal pipes)
4. Missed opportunities (filed under “someday”)
5. Self-worth (marked down for quick sale)
6. My treasure (money)

Net Profit:

Zero. In fact, I believe I owe myself back pay, plus interest, for years of unpaid overtime in the fields of emotional labor and self-sacrifice.

My Self Performance Review (no one else cared to notice):

I have exceeded expectations in all areas, often to my own detriment. I have been the first to arrive and the last to leave, the one who remembers birthdays, secrets, and the exact way you like your coffee. I have been the shoulder, the ear, the back-up plan, and the scapegoat. I have been reliable to a fault, silent when I should have spoken, and agreeable when I should have drawn the line.

I have also, on occasion, fantasized about faking my own disappearance, changing my name, and starting a new life as someone who says, “Sorry, I can’t help you with that,” without breaking into a cold sweat.

Reasons for Resignation:

Burnout: My internal battery is not, in fact, nuclear-powered. Turns out, “just keep going” is not a sustainable business model.

Unpaid Overtime: The emotional labor market is in a recession, and I’m tired of working for free.

Lack of Advancement: There is no promotion for being the strong one, only more work. The quiet one never gets a raise, just more silence. The person who never says no is rewarded with more things to say yes to.

Desire for Something Different: I’d like to try being the person who sometimes falls apart, who speaks up, who says, “No, thank you,” and means it. I hear the benefits are excellent.

Transition Plan:

There isn’t one. I have not trained a replacement, nor do I intend to. These roles are now open for applications, but I would advise any prospective candidates to read the fine print. The perks are overrated, and the dress code is “whatever hides the exhaustion.”

A Few Words to My Successor (if one is foolish enough to apply):

You will be tempted to believe that your worth is measured by how much you can carry, how little you complain, and how often you say yes. Don’t fall for it. The world will not end if you put yourself first. In fact, it might just begin.

Personal Effects:

I am packing up my invisible cape, my gag order, and my “yes” stamp. I am leaving behind the guilt, the fear of disappointing others, and the belief that my needs are negotiable. I am taking with me a new vocabulary: “No,” “Not today,” “That’s not my responsibility,” and “I need help.”

That's All Folks:

This is not a goodbye to you. This is a hello to me. The real me. The one who laughs too loud, who sometimes cries in public, who has opinions and boundaries and dreams that don’t fit into anyone else’s box. The one who is done auditioning for a role that never fit me or helped me.

If you need me, I’ll be here—living, not just surviving. Speaking up, not just nodding along. Saying yes when I mean it, and no when I don’t.

Sincerely,

Matty B. Good

a.k.a. The Strong One, The Quiet One, The Person Who Never Says No

(But from this day forward, simply—)

Just Me.