The grass ain't greener on the other side

As much as the quote implies, how many times have you said this to yourself - the minute after you change jobs, find a new partner or move to a new location? I've felt the same, a countless number of times. In times like this, you tend to mull over your past and grow a sense of deep regret.

Rest assured, I felt the same way when I changed jobs, attracted by higher pay. One year later and I was struggling to push myself out that toxic door. The grass really wasn't greener - it was spray painted green, over a musky withered yellow. In my current position too, I constantly feel the need to move - to the next bigger, better and grand concept. It sometimes helps to wonder - what if, what if this moment and space of time is the best place for you right now? That you must water your current garden, instead of looking for greener pastures?

I think partly, we can blame our human nature to always want to grow better than our competitors and exposure to social media, that we always look for the next 'best' thing, in a very short period of time. My current workplace is unanimously the most homeliest and warmest place I've ever spent as an employee. Our minds force us to manure to greener pastures, but forget what we already have with us.

Maybe sometimes, we should allow us to enjoy the goodness in life without being in a constant race. You are allowed to be in the moment and not worry about the future. I wonder if this is a common occurrence with younger people, who have the rest of their lives ahead of them. This year, I have tried to focus on prioritizing the smaller and less louder joys in life, and although they don't feel grander than grand accomplishments, they are enough to make me sustain with smiles. Social media and external validation really does make us want to instantly sprint our way to the finish line without stopping to consider whether we will fall down on the way, dangerously hurting ourselves.

The grass ain't greener on the other side, because you aren't a gardener. Anywhere you move to. I think that is where discipline and persistence comes into play. This is something that I have struggled with in the past few years after graduating. I wish I had a personal mentor - someone who is senior to look up to, but most of these days, I have been guiding myself along this journey, with the help of some kind friends. Watering your garden will sometimes give you instant results or at times, very slow results. Regardless, I believe we must keep watering.

Hobbies. I am not so sure whether successful people have hobbies that they pursue on the side of their careers. This year, I have (very latently) picked up my childhood hobbies once again. It truly helped that I now have more free time than I used to. This also brings me to ponder on, how hypocritical we can sometimes be. I remember when I was working a very high stress job, my coworkers and I complained that we do not have much free time. I was an avid partaker in these laments. However, after I began a new role, I have now received the 'green pasture' of free time that I longed for, but honestly, I take it for very granted. Ever since this realization, I have tried to enjoy my hobbies much more and it fuels me in slow and small steps.

~A simple memoir on recent life accounts :)