The Business I Almost Gave Up On: Until I Learned to Let Go

When I launched my small handmade candle business during lockdown, I never expected it to take off the way it did.

At first, it was just a hobby. I’d spend my evenings mixing scents and pouring wax in my tiny kitchen. I’d post photos on Instagram, offer discounts to friends, and occasionally get a sale or two through Etsy. It was simple, and it made me happy.

But by the end of that first year, everything changed. Orders increased. I started shipping nationwide. Influencers were tagging me. Suddenly, I wasn’t a hobbyist anymore. I was a business owner, and nothing in my life had prepared me for that.

The creative side of things, designing, packaging, and branding, came naturally. But when it came to managing the business, especially finances, I felt completely lost. I had no background in accounting or tax. I didn't know what I needed to file, when it was due, or what counted as a deductible expense. And payroll? I didn’t even know I needed to think about it until I hired my first part-time assistant.

At first, I tried to do it all on my own. I downloaded free spreadsheet templates, watched YouTube tutorials, and tried to stay organised. But the more orders I received, the more chaotic things became. I was up late fulfilling orders, waking up early to respond to emails, and squeeszing financial admin into moments between. I was burning out, and worse, I started to resent the business I had once loved.

The stress reached its peak during the holiday rush. I missed a supplier payment, double-paid another, and forgot to run payroll for my assistant altogether. She was kind and understanding, but I felt like a complete failure. I thought seriously about shutting the whole thing down.

Then I had a conversation that changed everything.

My older cousin, who had been running a successful catering business for years, asked me one simple question: “Why haven’t you outsourced your finances yet?”

I gave the usual answers, I couldn’t afford it, I didn’t know who to trust, I felt like I should be able to handle it myself. She laughed gently and told me that if I wanted my business to grow, I had to stop trying to wear every hat. She gave me the name of a firm offering Payroll Services in Kent, and suggested I start there.

I took her advice, even though it felt scary at first. I was nervous about handing over sensitive information, worried I’d look unprofessional, and unsure if they’d even want to work with a small business like mine. But from the very first call, I felt supported. They didn’t make me feel silly for what I didn’t know. Instead, they helped me clean up my records, set up a reliable payroll system, and even advised me on how to track expenses properly moving forward.

The shift was instant.

I started sleeping better. My assistant was paid correctly and on time. I had real clarity about my cash flow. And for the first time in months, I had time to think creatively again. I started experimenting with new product lines, planning a spring launch, and reconnecting with the joy that started it all.

Most importantly, I realised I didn’t have to do it all. Letting go of control in one area gave me power back in another. I wasn’t failing, I was finally learning how to lead.

To anyone reading this who’s juggling a creative business and drowning in behind-the-scenes stress, please hear me: you don’t have to be good at everything. You just have to be willing to ask for help.

Because building something beautiful shouldn’t come at the cost of burning yourself out.