Thank you life.

I’ve never chosen the woman I was, my path chose me instead.

Whatever I needed, whatever life called for- that’s who I became.

It wasn’t about what I ever wanted, but what I needed to do and be.

I always did what I had to do to keep moving forward in my life.

Truth is, I didn’t know how I’d make it sometimes, but I always found a way.

I’ve been the one who everyone looked to for strength, courage and passion, and somehow, I was always able to become what I needed to be.

I won’t say it’s been easy or painless, because the struggle I fought was almost overwhelming at times..

But I made things happen, because that’s who I am.

I’ll never be fearless, flawless or faultless, but I’ll always be real, genuine and authentic.

I love with all my heart and I don’t do anything halfway.

My soul is filled with passion and I love hard when there’s love to be had.

I fill many roles and I have a never ending list of responsibilities, but I’ve learned I’m capable of conquering anything.

The fires that once threatened to burn me alive now fuel my drive to rise above and fly high.

Maybe my plans don’t always work out perfectly and there may have been a time or two when it came off the rails, but I managed to find my way almost every time.

I’ve provided and protected for those who needed me.

I’ve loved my people who wanted me.

I’ve fought for the ones who couldn’t do it themselves.

I’m a woman of many talents, qualities and depths..born of the darkest times which forged my ironclad spirit.

But no matter who I’ve been and what I’ve done, there’s always one part of me that I’ve needed most:

The survivor.

She’s the one that kept me going, gave me strength and lifted me up when I fell.

Come what may, she’ll always be the part I value most,

For as long as I will ever need her,

She’ll always be there.

I met myself on a crossroad, which way left or right or back, a voice said “does it matter if you don’t know where you are going“ thinking about it made me realise, no it doesn’t matter, just as long as you keep going. It was like passing ships, that I should find me. I had the biggest influence of my life, if I took over it. Ignore the white noise and strongly maybe boldly take a leap of fait.

Feel the breeze of the fresh air, the warmth of the Sun, I hadn’t been out of this Cell, bedroom in almost 4 years, working myself into an early grave with the demands of other people.

Well I met myself, looked in the mirror and thought this is you! Would you want to meet yourself. Yes I would thank you, now I would. I didn’t or haven’t really enjoyed life up till this point I just ploughed through 30 years without noticing me.

So now the biggest influence in my life was indeed myself. I am happy to me myself and the positive changes that I have made in my outlook and my understanding of the failings of the humanities are all white noise, cover your ears and get closer to yourself, you will be shocked at what you learned from past to present and the most beautiful uplifting thing you can do is not to forget to reach for those that have not met themselves and enlighten them too . Learn to life, not just to survive.