Reflections Of Destiny

August 12th, 2024

(Edited/Finalized on the 14th)

Outliers: An Outline Forms

The following is a catalog of music which has captured my imagination and willpower, taking hold at stages grand and small throughout my life. It is by all means the closest approximation to fact that I can surmise to muster, and yet is by any comfort a stranger to exhaustion. I have approached it from as delicate of an angle as I can, assured at least that even these tracks are rich in themselves, and necessary to share. Of course, it is my own experiences which have brought me to own them so, and by no means is that guaranteed to mean anything at all to the pursuits of your own filters or subjection.

However, for those with a deeper interest in these tracks, or my own perceptions of them, I am open to elaborating upon them in further detail in the comments section at the very least.

And as always: thank you for your support! \m/, B']

Reflections Of Youth & Questionable Origins (In Terms of Recognizing Certain Tunes)

STANDOUT PIECE: Pure 80's, Various Artists

I trace this back as the beginning of it all -- taking into account that this came some years following the bulk of association with Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, another critical object of enlightenment which I will delve into shortly.

Finding this CD at my father's house (I believe it was his wife's) set the record straight for me, no pun, if any, intended. It spoke to me in ways that the classic rock which I had up until that point associated with failed to in comparison. The essence of it all was simply...too clearly communicable to my senses.

Let it be said, too, that I have an obvious affinity for 90's music to a degree, as a child of that generation. Still, it is primarily the emotional resonances which stick with me, be it through dance or, to a degree, pop music.

You could venture, even more definitively, that the synthesizer is the crux of my allure, and work your way out from there.

Some Tracks That Lit The Way

"You've Got It (The Right Stuff)", New Kids On The Block

In tune, to a degree, with the Police song I mention later, this track caught me with the receding aspect of its chorus in parts, where Jordan's words fall back into nothing. Along with Pat Benatar's "Love Is A Battlefield" (now that I think of it), it highlights my feelings about myself as insignificant or undeserving of love (be it as a teenager and essentially still new human being, or otherwise), and of a slipping into the darkness and non-existence that nothingness and an all-around being-forgotten-by-everyone-as-if-I-never-existed result would gift.

To put it neutrally, though, it was probably more that a perception of visual and audial mediums as being separate things had been broken in the experience in perceiving that aspect of song through my imagination...if you catch my drift there.

"(I Just) Died In Your Arms", Cutting Crew

Along with Icehouse's "The Heartbreak Kid", this was essentially one of the most profound songs I had ever experienced, or one of the most profound experiences I had had amongst the audial medium. I suppose it could be equated to the visiting of thunder and rainfall on a perfectly sunny day: the day may be perfect to me, but my heart calls for the comforting flow and gloom of the textual former.

"How Bizarre", OMC

Iconic in its chorus, it is like a precious anchor into emotion I would never soon forsake; rooted, perhaps, in the desires of an outcast rejoicing in the pain of separation and perceptions of the like.

Some Honorable Mentions

The Radio Stations, from Grand Theft Auto: Vice City; San Andreas

Without even elaborating on the significance of the dark comedy prevalent throughout those stations' material and tone, tracks like Go West's "Call Me" and Living Colour's "Cult Of Personality" influenced me in their own particular ways. Not to mention the fact that I had been under the impression that each singer was of a totally different ethnicity, having confused Go West the band's name with The Village People's track of the same name, having simply presumed that the lead singer of Living Colour was white, probably due to an adolescent cultural association, as I myself am so.

Let it be known that I do not frown upon it or anything: it was just part of my road to discovery, and I am certainly proud of the interesting-ness of its existence.

Teenage Years & Enlightenment To "The 80's"

STANDOUT PIECE: "Just Like Paradise", David Lee Roth

During what I would equate to the prime of DIRECTV and perhaps of music channels in general -- around 2007, I'm thinking -- I discovered said channels, embracing them in turn as a form of significant "radio play" and letting things ride.

I cannot recall exactly the visual and extrasensory scenarios enwrapping the guitar drop which struck a chord in me (again, no pun intended), outside of the immediate peripheries of such a critical point in memory. All I really perceive with ease is a singular conglomeration, the like of which is prevalent in numerous other cases for me.

(As an aside: I have heard at least two 90's tracks, A Touch Of Class's "Around The World (La La La La La)" and Alice Deejay's "Better Off Alone", coming from my family member's adjacent bedroom in the past five minutes. Due to the arrival of the second, and as signs of the echoes of my own intents for me and for them, I felt it necessary and suggested I make note of these things here.)

Nevertheless, when all is said and done, it is a track which has firmly slotted its place into the significance of my reality to this day.

Some Tracks That Lit The Way

"She Sells Sanctuary", The Cult

This is an artifact of a certain stage of my life -- very likely due to the ear-catching instrumental intro and the track's production all-around. I'm honestly not sure what the put my finger on, except for its pulse, to describe its significance to me in such a place as this spot; on this list; and in this place; and this time.

"King Of Pain", The Police

A track whose title I related to a long time ago. That may not be the most accurate way to put it, but it is all I've got for now, and may be enough in itself, it's call-out here and all other things considered.

On a side note, to put it in somewhere with ease: "European (I Wish I Was)" by A Flock Of Seagulls. If you don't catch my drift with this one, just ask. Consider it an Easter egg for now.

"Plush", Stone Temple Pilots

For the longest time (and to a degree to this day), it remained quite clear to me there was a slightly offset echo to the chorus, so slight it was just tangent to hidden. Maybe it was a combination of imagination, audio quality back in those days (depending on the source of my listen), or any number of things. Still, it was fascinating for me, to say the least.

Some Honorable Mentions

Accidental Theme Songs (To Written Works)

Perhaps as ancestors of yet another association which I shall elaborate on in the final section, Natalie's "Goin' Crazy" and Gwen Stefani's "Hollaback Girl" are two tracks I associated, due to particularly relevant snippets of audio that called to me, with a like number of companion works. In particular, I associated "Goin' Crazy" (and its bubble-esque intro, which was doubly reminiscent for me of the soundtrack for the hidden submerged clock-tower level in Super Mario 64, for those in the know) with the novel Sphere by Michael Crichton, and "Hollaback Girl" (and its eerie sliding audio sound, which interjected its refrain <if that is correct> and chorus) with It by Stephen King. Again, there is no clear logic involved.

Actually, on the topic, and as I already mentioned Go West, their eponymous album, to me, really echoed Stephen King's novel in my mind, in both literal and figurative ways. Interesting (at least to me) that the album was released a year and change before the book officially was, and was presumably crafted in its entirety within the same period as its production (the book, as detailed in Stephen King's afterward, if I remember correctly, was written between 1981 and 1986).

All in all, I just love connections. Probably why I always enjoyed digging holes next to each other as a kid and experiencing bridging a gap between them!!!

From Outer Years ~ 'Til Now

As is probably evident from this read and many (if not all) others like it, I can do this all day (thanks, Cap).

In the process of writing this today, it has evolved from a straight-forward, mapped out piece, into one including patches here and there, buffers and shinings which may or may not latch with adequate integrity (both internal and external) onto their new environments at hand. The fact remains that, although I feel inspired in my writing (in states like this article has seen me, in particular), I am more of an orator...whether or not that is due in no small part to the fact that my brain recalls and delivers faster than my fingers and craftmanship skills can channel onto a computer screen (not bothering to even mention the printed page, LMAO!)

Evidently, it is kind of a miracle that I am even in the flow as we speak, as usually it becomes a chore to get something long-form in for me in one sitting -- let alone a slew of them.

Anyway, I do believe it will show, and will continue on despite myself.

Well...myself. Lol.

STANDOUT PIECE: Unknown

"Rodeo", Motley Crue

As mentioned above, there are some tracks which I have come to associate with written works along the way. This time around, it is the Goosebumps book, "The Ghost Next Door", which is called to the forefront.

WARNING: Spoilers To Follow...

Essentially, the book ends with the young female lead coming to the realization that the ghost next door is, in fact, her, and not the boy that all signs pointed to (in her eyes) as being the real ghost. The described visual which kicked everything into gear for me was (and I'm guesstimating here, as I have not read it for quite a few years now) of her being pulled into the spirit world and reunited with her family. In my mind, I am perceiving her seeing the Earth, clouds amongst and beyond her, their voices, and, of course, my own addition in Motley Crue's accidental soundtrack.

Again, it was almost as if the emotional core of each work in some way meshed in my perceptions, and so they easily slotted together, now inextricably -- even if below the surface, or to the faintest degree. I certainly could not say if it was premeditated somehow, by chance, or out of any other origin. All that remains is what is likely my own special perception of all relevant things now.

"Call Box 1-2-3", Wall Of Voodoo

Along with David Lee Roth's "Goin' Crazy" ("Goin' Crazy" for the double), and on a similar level with the female-led tracks referenced earlier, this was a track whose snippet of instrumentation or hook left an impression on me.

For Wall of Voodoo, it was the cowbell and keyboard or synth work, particularly in the chorus, which brought to mind visuals of rising into the sky, space, the clouds, or a combination of two or more of those elements.

For Roth, it was the three-note keyboard (or synth) riff typically preceding "...from the heat..." in the chorus, a sound I associated with watching my Nana's house before I finally backed out of the drive, thinking about my relationship with my Dad's side of the family.

I think it is the goofiness -- the defended youthfulness, even in the face of the demon of adulthood -- which moves me.

"The Heartbreak Kid", Icehouse

When I heard this track, I was struck by how layered it came across to me. The metaphors, the feelings, the experience, everything. It was honestly one of the most profound songs I had ever experienced, and one that I'm sure will last with me through the ages -- regardless of how dim its vibrancy to my common sensations will ultimately become. I urge you to check it out for yourself.

"Seeking", White Bat Audio

A presence I discovered specifically on YouTube, White Bat Audio has a bevy of synth tracks which are such a treat to my senses that the words to describe them all would probably intertwine and amass to such a degree that writing about them might just be an act in futility.

Now whether that is an over-the-top statement, or one relatively down-to-Earth, "Seeking" is one track I will single out. So deep and profound and painful and close-to-home to me, it calls to mind the plight of angels, searching for that which they have lost. It is as if the seeker (musician) has mimicked their wordless voices in the strings of choral notes.

Along with City Circuitry's "Elite Geographic (Elite Geographic II)" (a vaporwave track I discovered through an unassociated playlist), it is a track which channels both pleasure and pain into one for me, and pleads my mind (and ignorant form) into desperate action...before it is too late.

"Waiting For You", Corey Hart

Apart from being one of many proofs that "singles" blind the public to the glory of albums and further, there is such a completeness and presence to this track that, along with "The Heartbreak Kid", its significance rises high above what even I consider in my musical-emotional experiences as "the norm".

(Also on that note: Rest in peace, Norm [MacDonald]. I should never have doubted my appreciation for you due to the commercialization of perceptions onto whose train I took my departure, until beyond your passing. I am so sorry. I hope I get the chance to meet you some day, in that form of yours lost so long gone, even now.)

Honorable Mentions:

"The Sun and the Rainfall", Depeche Mode

Through the veil of my words, in all of your experience with them, keep them in mind, and listen to this track. Let me know how you feel about it and my angle, after the fact.

"I'm No Animal", Felony (Along With Metropolis' "The Darkest Side of the Night" and Lion's "Love Is A Lie")

On top of the defining crescendo of the chorus towards the end of the former track, these are certain proof that even B-movies (if applicable / and in tandem) can give rise to stand-alone glory.

\m/, ZOMBIE JASON ALL THE WAY!!!! .\m/

* "Red Harvest Comes", Versions 1 and 2, Paul Saax, from the Jack's Back motion picture soundtrack

In editing this article today for release, it comes to mind that I forgot to mention this set of tracks. Not only is the intro to this film, in concurrence with Version 1 ("Version 1" being an either official or non-official designation in terms of the YouTube track I borrowed it from) of the theme track, an experience that I strongly urge you to partake in yourself, it coincides with a call-out I should make to Peter Gabriel's "Red Rain", which was the song originally desired for the film, and whose lack of accessibility gave way to its powerful, and in ways superior, replacement.

(Comparing "Red Harvest Comes" and "Red Rain" is like comparing Bad and Thriller (the Michael Jackson albums) for me. I naturally prefer Bad, as masterpieces certainly do not have to be glossy, et al, to be prominent and effective. Simply put, as I gather: Thriller has a larger commercial appeal.

Feel free to voice your own opinions in the comments.)

BYE FOR NOW

That is all I can bear to say for now. Although I am still in the groove (still no pun intended), there is far, far more I could find to add, and probably things I could find in the editing process to sprinkle in there* (if I could manage to keep it even that straight-to-the-point, anyway). If I ever get Vocal+ again, and this article rises toward any sense of external prominence or regard, then I might just come back and "beef" it up. Until then, it will serve as yet another testament to subject matters and experiences which I am doubtless to revisit and reshare in the future, anyway.

Take from this as you may, and remember, regardless of how late this is in saying:

EXPERIENCE THE SOURCE ALBUMS (AND FILMS) {{{FIRST}}} IF POSSIBLE

Whole~Conglomerate works -- perhaps not modern ones so much as the classics, in my belief -- are meant to be appreciated in their intended, singular forms. Individualization -- commercialization if you will -- comes later.

* * ~

Commercialization, or

--

on a humbler,

more heartfelt,

more forgivable level,

--

the youth of the love you have shared with another.

Perhaps even me.

\m/, The Z-Man B']