ORDERING DELIVERY FOOD WITHOUT BEING A JERK

The advent of Covid-19 and the subsequent lockdowns saw a huge increase in orders for food delivery. This was a huge boon for people like me, who use the “gig” industry as a handy way to make some extra money or to fill times when we’re between regular jobs. Unfortunately, there seem to be increasing numbers of customers who don’t understand what’s involved in bringing this convenience to them, and quite a few other drivers I know are opting out of this kind of work. Therefore, I’m offering this handy guide, in the hopes that my job will be easier and you will be able to continue using this handy option.

1) Turn your porch light on.

It never ceases to amaze me when I pull up to a house to make a delivery, and there are no lights on in the yard or on the porch. I mean, these people know I’m coming; they placed the order! In Phoenix, Arizona, where I live and work, most of the residential streets have little or no street lighting, which means the path up to the front door is pitch-black if the residents don’t turn on a light. I’m not looking to trip over your plants or your kid’s bicycle just to bring you your dinner.

Also, many food delivery drivers are female – like me – and walking up to a stranger’s house in the dark does not exactly fill us with enthusiasm. I hope you can understand why without further explanation.

2) Make your house number visible.

This is in keeping with number one. I’m sure you and all your relatives and buddies know exactly where your house is. I, however, am a stranger who’s never been to your house before. Yes, I have a navigation app on my phone, and I use it. But navigation apps aren’t always perfect, and I like to verify that I’m at the correct house. I can’t do that if your house number is shrouded in shadow, or stuck behind your Christmas decorations, or whatever. Oh, and if you live in an apartment complex which doesn’t use apartment numbers visible from the driver’s seat of a car, consider meeting me outside. I’m a food delivery driver, not Columbus looking for a new route to India.

3) Put relevant information in your app profile.

On the subject of me not being an intrepid world explorer, the easier you make it to find your house, the sooner you’re going to get your food. If you live in an expensive gated community that requires an access code, you know that before you ever order the food. You must, because the security is probably one of the reasons you live there. The time to tell me that code is in the notes on your profile, not in a separate text when I’m already at the gate with an impatient person honking his horn in the car behind me. The same goes for specific instructions for finding your house, which are always handy to have. Do me a solid and give some thought to how easy your house is to get to for someone who’s never been there.

Worst of all are the people who assume they’ll just call me when I get close and “talk me through” getting there. Yes, I do have a cell phone that is required equipment for my job. However, I – for example – am hearing-impaired and have a lot of trouble understanding phone conversations. Also, absolutely no one should be trying to talk on the phone – or text (!) – while driving. Bottom line, if my vehicle is in motion, I’m not answering you.

4) Try to order from restaurants close to your house.

For some reason, many ordering platforms are extremely sloppy about filtering your restaurant choices by distance from your house. This is a complete pain in the butt for the drivers, because customers either don’t know this, or they don’t pay attention. Next thing you know, we’re making a ten-mile slog with someone’s McDonald’s order past two other McDonald’s outlets for $4-5 plus tip. And fast-food orders rarely have much of a tip.

Delivery drivers tend to prefer to work a specific area, usually because it’s close to where they live and they’re familiar with it. Often, we also choose a specific area because it’s busy; we are doing this to make money, after all. If I must drive a long way to deliver your order, the delivery cost and my base pay will be more, but not nearly enough more to cover the extra gas and the time I’ve spent (during which I could have delivered two or three other orders). Also, I’m now out of my area, quite possibly in a place that has no orders for me to pick up, which means I have to eat the cost in more gas and time to backtrack.

I get it: your favorite restaurant in the world is a one-of-a-kind little bistro across town from where you live, and you simply must have their food tonight. Fine, but please factor that consideration into the tip.

5) For the love of God, TIP!

Here’s the deal, guys: that delivery fee added onto your bill doesn’t go to the driver. With most delivery services, it goes to the restaurant. I get a VERY small base amount for my delivery, and it doesn’t remotely cover my time, gas, and wear-and-tear on my car. The expectation, of both my delivery service and me, is that I will make my money from tips. If you’re not tipping, I’m not making money. If I’m not making money, guess what else I’m not doing? That’s right, I’m not delivering food any more. If enough drivers get discouraged and don’t see food delivery as a good way to make extra cash, pretty soon you’ll be going out to pick up your own food.

Also, this idea that the tip should be calculated as a percentage of your food order is an outdated leftover from tipping servers in a restaurant, let’s be honest here. Your server is carrying your food in her hands from the kitchen to your table; I’m carrying it in my car across town. While it makes a difference to your server how much food you order, it makes no difference to me at all. I can carry a four-course meal for a family just as easily as I can carry one coffee from Starbuck’s. Or, to put it another way, your coffee from Starbuck’s is just as much work for me as if you had ordered a four-course meal.

When tipping a delivery driver, here are the things you should consider:

How far did she have to travel? Gas and time both cost money.

How busy is the restaurant she went to? Picking up from a restaurant with one customer in it is very different from picking up at the trendiest spot in town.

How likely is she to be able to pick up another order in your area? If you live in a fancy community on the outskirts of town because you don’t like the noise and crowds, that also means I’m going to have to backtrack a long way to get another order, and you’re costing me extra money.

How hard did she have to look to find you? Most apartment complexes in Phoenix have maps by the front gate to help you find specific apartments, and I use them as much as possible. However, some of those maps might possibly have been drawn by a kindergartner, and others were apparently placed by someone who doesn’t drive. Likewise, some apartment parking lots are not designed for hapless drivers just trying to drop off food: no visitor parking, no access to front doors without hiking, etc. Also, a surprising number of customers live on the third floor but have no desire to pause their Netflix for five minutes to come down and meet their driver. Fine, but that extra hike up those stairs should be reflected in the tip.

Was your food hot? I and a lot of my fellow drivers have invested in insulated bags to carry our orders in. They keep the food hot and also keep it from spilling in our cars. If your food shows up fast and hot and not slopping out of the boxes, this is because your driver made an extra effort to make that happen.

Did I have to do something extra for you? A lot of times, my customers will text me during the pick-up to ask for things like extra sauce, extra napkins, etc. Other times, the restaurant will be out of one of the items ordered. In that case, I have the option of cancelling the order and making the customer re-order. I also have the option, which I personally choose, of calling the customer and asking what substitution they would prefer. I’m not required to do that; I do it because I want to complete your order. If I got you your extras, or asked you about substitutions, or anything else of that nature, please remember it in the tip.

Did I follow your instructions? If you ask me to leave your food in a specific place, or to not knock or ring the doorbell because it disturbs your dog or baby or whatever, then it’s nice to acknowledge that I paid attention to your wishes.

The bottom line is this: please just remember that delivery drivers are people doing a job you, the customer, want us to do, judging by the number of orders out there. Don’t be a jerk and make our lives harder, and it will pay off with faster deliveries and continued service for you.