My Name Is Sandra N Ewsington

Once a child asked me "Sandra why does chocolate taste bad?" and I knew they had the chops. You know what I'm talking about, especially you people who usually don't like kids all that much. You see that one kid who has the talent to become something more than those other kids around them and if you just helped cultivate that potential they'd bloom from a snot-nosed brat into something special.

Into something Sandra.

So I adopted an Asian baby, acted really loving and all that (plus I forked over a nice sum of cash) then settled down right in that same town the kid lived in. Which sounds horribly deranged in hindsight, but let me assure you of this fact that kid had the potential to become a legendary reporter, journalist and overall bad bitch. She also had a clean bill of health which I had a few doctor friends check out for me since I didn't want the little tyke to be one of those persevering yet very ill types. This kid was a bonafide perfect specimen yet there were a few problems because I didn't have enough time (or care to be honest) to get myself a degree in teaching so I couldn't directly educate her.

I did become a troop leader for this knockoff Girl Scout group they had in town, though. It was quite an interesting experience turning a group of a random assortment of girls from ages 8 to 13 into truly successful beings. Some trauma and a bit of cult-like mental frame did have to be grafted onto the girls to really wring out all that unprofessional and quite childish behavior they had. Negative reinforcement training didn't work all that well at first because the older girls didn't really believe I would punish them while the younger ones exuded pure primal fear, a type of fear that couldn't be molded into loyalty. So I feigned weakness and told the girls that they were right. How could I ever take away such amenities such as phones and other electronics from them? Obviously, I added a bit of meekness to my acting to seal the deal and they bought it.

The troop then essentially disbanded because none of the girls would come back because they told their parents that I quote "Am a raging narcissistic bitch." which I later learned because I told them to tell me. See obedience can be taught with fear, which is what one Jessica Ledn became an example of. My journalistic senses were tingling when I went through the list of the girls' names and I found hers. I sensed a decent sized scoop, not a middle school scoop, but a big one (well at least big relative to the size of a small town.)

As I followed the girl in my black SUV, I started to realize that the scoop's scent only lingered on the girl, which meant she was close to the source but the source itself. So I pursued her and even waited outside her house for a whole night until she came out of the house with what seemed to be her father on her way to school. I realized this man was the scoop and if I got to the center of it I'd be able to get my revenge on those children, leverage my position as troop leader and ultimately keep my legacy going forever hypothetically speaking.

Anyways, long story short, he was cheating on his wife with a bunch of random women, most of them housewives who were also friends with said wife, so yikes. Anywho a few candid photos later and then I was off to contact the man's daughter.

I told her that I was collecting the troop uniform because we were getting officially disbanded by the unofficial official Girl Scouts ripoff group and she said, "Could you just come here instead?" which I happily complied with. Showed her the photos which just made the poor girl breakdown and say "Please don't show my mom...". Made a whole big speech about trust and how not everyone is like that and that her mom deserves to know the truth. Which lightened her mood and if continued with that speech, she probably would have found the will to confront her dad about this, then tell her mom. But like my goal wasn't that, so I flip-flopped my speech halfway through about how people sometimes can't just love one person and restricting someone like that is immoral. Then flip-flopped a few more times. Poor girl seemed mentally exhausted, so I basically warned/told her I might show everyone the photos if she didn't get her friends to join the troop and became my co-troop leader. She just tiredly nodded.

Overall, a risky gamble, but it paid off as she started to become a lot more cold-hearted after that and every-time she talked to me it seemed like she was trying to learn from me. Trying to learn how I could earnestly say and believe completely antithetical ideas, then use that skill to break her. But that half-assed attempt to manipulate me just resulted in me learning more about her and slowly clawing my way under her armor. It only took a week though I guess that was because she was tenish? Can't really remember.

But through her I eventually started the troop once more though this was basically through her begging her mom to beg the other moms to tell their daughters to come and...I'm ashamed to admit this but I offered a quite expensive lunch if they came. It was pizza but not from a chain pizza place, not from a pizza place that sells average decent quality pizza but from a place that sells really goddamn good pizza. The type of place you buy a slice for seven bucks and feel disgusted in your reckless impulsivity when it comes to buying things but then after that first bite realize who gives a fuck it tastes great.

So I bought pasta, pizza, wings and so much more. There were even leftovers, which I kindly packed up, then told the girls to bring some to their families. My suffering in those hundreds of thousands of moments that composed that evening felt impossible to measure. But I had lured the girls in and my co-troop leader was coming in handy. For the next meeting, she said I should have a one on one "sesh" with all the girls like I did with her and I tiredly agreed.

So the next day I went to each girl's house and asked to speak with them outside, which obviously only worked hassle-free with some of the parents. Using my expertise at conflict-resolution and conflict-instigation, I pin-pointed the vulnerabilities in these people which had mixed results. Some just stood there after I was done as if waiting for a further command which I usually just told them to call down their girl so I could do the same to them, some looked at me in disgust but in a way their disgust was truly aimed at themselves (just had to prod a bit more to get them to realize that), some were enraged to the point of even spitting in my face but a bit more work then they were putty in my hands and finally some became enraptured by me...these are usually the best and worst ones. The girls, however, I put a lot more precision on how I talked to them because what I wanted was to imbue them all with a bit of me even if none of them shined right.

Even if I failed, my charisma and my feats could live on through these girls, but I have failed that badly yet 😛.

With girls and their parents under my control, I set a news war into action. I had a printing group, advertisement group, "fund acquirement" group, journalist group, social media group and a fact-checker group made. These girls, under my guidance, revolutionized the town's news industry, but before that we slowly expanded our group. More money was needed, more people were needed, and our power was too disorganized and not yet accepted by the bigger fish in this small pond. So I worked with the parents to have them set aside any funds they had such as college funds or savings, and instead place them into our news agency. At first they didn't understand, but then they did (with a little threatening and manipulation). The money rolling in was good, but we needed to needle our way into the competition's veins and so I had the girls set up social media accounts that were really just ways of getting gossip.

They'd claw through endless heaps of useless garbage and they'd grumble about how dumb this was until I smiled at them then said, "Why not influence it a bit?". They said "What do you mean Sandra" (they call me Sandra because people think you like them if you let them call you by your first name) and I said "You guys basically know the ins-and-outs of all of this so if you want to you guys can do what you want as long as you.... "Don't get caught" they said in return.

Soon they used it to their own benefits, learning secrets, passwords and getting things they wanted quite easily, but eventually they realized it was the game of endless information acquisition that allured them, not the power it gave them. Social engineering was their main way of getting info, but eventually they figured out how to use software some more malicious than others to get info easier. Eventually they became like the town's immune system seemingly unnoticeable till suddenly attacked a festering problem like the occasional creep or crime usually by reporting them with mountains of evidence yet no way to trace them back.

My "fund-acquirement" group used certain inputs from the social media group to twist the hands of certain individuals so we could have a bit more money to work with. Cheaters and corrupt politicians were usually the go to for people to get money from, but sometimes we didn't stop at money. Sure, the politicians we had caught had a self-incriminating text or two that probably could cause a massive federal investigation but we needed more. We needed enough so we could maneuver perfectly through the small town's corruption like a worm through soil because that'd allow us to eventually expand state-wide. So we asked them to be our new eyes in the sky and they would reluctantly agree.

The other groups you can obviously understand why I made them so I could set up my own news agency. We cornered that small town's market and then we devoured it. Every news company became ours either through manipulative or cooperative means, but it was always up to them, them being those companies. They could have stopped us if they worked together but unfortunately we did first and plus the fact-checker group really fucked over our competition but to be fair no one would have cared until the advertisement group was founded. They breached the really dumb vapid, meaningless propaganda one of the town's new station blared like how "Nike as a brand does not support holistic nuclear family principles and values by not selling more formal and traditional footwear." We publicly devoured that company under the guise of someone buying a company that could only create tabloid news.

Soon the company became MNN or the multi-media news network. Soon the troop I ran just became a front to recruit new girls into our group and we did run into some trouble, but eventually the easiest solution was to take over the group that oversaw our troop.

Finally, the perfect environment was laid down, and the girl would eventually join. She would rise through the ranks, then reach the top, taking over as co-troop leader then soon taking over as leader. Not even the social media group would know that I had planned this because I hadn't, at least not fully. I merely set up a very alluring path for fate and would take that path since it was the one of least resistance, the most logical one. But years passed and the girl was going to graduate then leave this town. There was also the fact that my own child was the one rising through the ranks, which was unprecedented. They hadn't shown such potential, and then they did. But they didn't shine like her and they wanted my love.

Oh and before you ask I treated like I treat everyone else in my troop i.e impartially and equally.

Part of me thought I shouldn't make a sudden move, since they would all know. They wouldn't ask nor question me, but they would know and another part knew if she left all of this was for no reason. So it was finally time for state-wide expansion and like always my troop complied. I put my co-troop leader in charge for a week then went on a break, but it was a test and they knew it was. They have adapted well to my behaviors, but you can teach anyone to do something with enough time, but not everyone has natural born talent.

The girl was going to the east-coast to study in NYC. We would have to expand to a ridiculous degree and eventually this would all fall apart without multiple people such as myself, which being genuine is not possible. The co-leader I have made and molded in my image is quite a good one and she'll go far, but even I couldn't manage a multi-state project like this. Contingencies would be needed by the dozens if not hundreds, systems set in place to keep things functioning autonomously without much direct leadership oversight and division between sectors to keep people ignorant because if thousands of people know a secret then millions do as well. At that point I'd just be creating a self-sustaining news agency as well as a professional black-mailing group that constantly shoots hundreds of smaller groups, bigger groups and off-shoots around the globe. It'd eventually assimilate itself into everything on purpose instead of doing so as a by-product of certain actions like other groups do.

Which is the co-leader's plan, she told me explicitly she plans to go against my directives and do this one day because she knows if she hid it I would eventually know which is false but props on me for teaching her to fear me. No props to the fact that eventually my news agency, which was just meant to be a small little project, might spiral out of control and become an ever-expanding force that has no oversight, no means of stopping it.

But without it becoming that I wouldn't reach the girl in time, so I asked around each group asking for the instructions that the co-leader gave them even the fake ones meant to be given to me in this scenario. I realized quite quickly that the co-leader planned on seeding multiple of these autonomous agencies, some were unwittingly set up so that they'd prompt more people to join or create their own agencies then a secondary group branched from the seed would take over planting the seed in the people of agency that they can takeover. They can also dominate others.

I'll spare you the rest of the types of agencies because these spanned in the hundreds and they could even be mixed and matched, making them more like millions of possible seed agency combinations. I set out to finally make the co-leader's ideas true and told them to initiate the plans and the seeds were spread. It seems the co-leader's plans didn't even need a little work before initiation because the groups involved had preemptively made quite professional-looking packets on who to contact and what to do to start these groups. Some even abandoned their lives here and went to live in other states to become a part of something meant to purposely remove the humanity from news by making the people in it like cells in its body.

But the efficiency was amazing, though the quality was not that great because there was no Sandra touch to anything but the former troopers' groups worked well and so I decided that I'd manage an NYC seed without anyone's knowledge. I abandoned all forms of identification and even got work done to make sure no one would find me.

They tried their best though, by posting articles that would bait someone like me, a legendary journalist, to take the bait, but I knew their tricks and I resisted. I eventually even gave up the internet.

Soon I reached NYC, a city known for so much, but who really cares about that? I got myself a bacon, egg and cheese then decided to work at this local printing that just happened to be working with this experimental art/news group known as "FAuxusion" or known as East Coast New York Seedling#48A, Branch#15. A group the girl had gotten into or alternatively a group which a seedling agency invaded unknowingly of course, because none of the agencies really knew what they were meant for.

We talked a bit but the group members, although they were polite and respected my traditional style of news gathering, didn't seem to perfectly be at ease with me being with them. Normally I'd play the game of schmoozing with them a bit and winning them over with ease, but my charisma was leaving.

My teeth became a travesty and my hair became so thin it seemed like they'd just fall straight out of follicle the second the second a strand became a few inches long.

Without my mind being in the right place, the girl soon asked me, "Hey aren't you Miss Ewsington" and all I could say was "My girl that is such a beautiful name" before passing out. I was rushed to the hospital with the girl by my side and I realized right now was my moment.

"Hey girl" I slurred.

"Yes, Miss Ewsington?"

"Call me Sandra."

"..O-okay."

"YOu were trying to hide from me."

"What?"

"I found you," I said before laughing and laughing. The girl looked at me in confusion and I stared at myself through her be-speckled, light grey eyes. I wondered how many times I've been in this exact moment, hoping if not begging to not be lost in the depths of old age but to be fair a stroke's a stroke not even youth can stop one. Though it can help.

So I grabbed the young girl's hand, and I mustered all the strength I could to tell her my story from start to end. At some point, she seems as exhausted as I do and is about to tell me she has to go. Then I used the same charm I always do. Her mind weaken by my onslaught of meaningless yet so deeply profound and impactful arguments that she has to stay. She listens to all of my life story even how I had prepared so much for her future and how she essentially rendered my plans null and void.

She looks scared, disgusted, angry, and yet curious. She knows that I hadn't told her everything even though it was never possible to tell her everything so I whisper into her ears, brushing her dirty blond hair and say "Your name is Sandra N Ewsington and you're the best reporter in the world."

Then I left the hospital with no need of outpatient paperwork and decided that art school is fun, but traveling the world sounds a lot more interesting especially in your early 20s.

What I'm basically saying is that this has been Sandra N Ewsington and her little story about her little ol life. Now if any of you would like to get in contact with me to be the main and only reporter in my news agency group, that's been around since the 60s just send me an email ;)