Memories: 7 May 2025

7 May 2025

7:58 am Life goes on…

7 May 2023

Watching “Three Thousand Years of Longing”…wonderful…. 11.55 pm What a gorgeous movie! I wish…I had seen it on the big screen when it first came out. I should have followed my instincts. But I am fresh out of djinn…or am I? I bought a small parcel of small opals today, as recommended by my new friend Orietta who found them on marketplace.

Only a few weeks ago I made a video about wanting to buy opals to cut and polish for jewellery. By the grace of the gods that manifested rather quickly.

If only I could manifest a life partner that fluently and fluidly…but humans have free Will and can be slippery little suckers. Unlike stones or gems that are prisoners of my love and wonder, awe and circumspect affection, worn only as adornments, material fripperies gifted by the gods. :-)

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Watching “Qodrat” about an Indonesian exorcist. Intense but excellent movie.

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A lovely time was had at West End Drumming Circle! Even though there were some rain showers. Another lady and I weathered the showers, getting soaking wet and we didn’t mind at all.

Beauregard however, was seriously irritated by the downpour. But it soon passed. Rain and shine we experience the Divine. Yippee Yi Yo…on we go!

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Today I spent soldering pendants. I only succeeded with one and that was a bit of a hatchet job lol.

I also got a message from a new friend I made on the Art of Jewellery fb site about a parcel of milk white opals for sale. I decided (rather impulsively!) to buy them.

It will give me practise on sanding and polishing opals which is an almost meditative practise that I rather enjoy! The bonus is I get something beautiful to show for all my hard work, grinding and polishing. Perhaps something I can set into jewellery too! Exciting!

I literally put it out to the multiverses only a few weeks ago on one of my zany YouTube videos and hey! presto! The stones have already manifested! Miraculous!

This afternoon I am going to West End Drumming Circle. That should be fun. I am still quite tired from my shamanic berserker dancing on Friday night. So it will be relaxing to sit by the river and drum or listen to the drumming!

I am feeling very much loved and supported and blessed right now. Gratitude to All That Is!

7 May 2022

2:38 pm home from a great night out dancing. I looked fabulous but the very high patent leather stilettos were not a good idea. I have very sore feet now. Oopsies…time fighting space bandit Mama T will not relinquish her inappropriate shoe fetish easily. I wore lower heeled boots the last two times I went dancing. 🙂

I caught up with Jane (who is one of the cleaners at the casino). It was good to see her. We gave each other a massive hug!

I also danced with Lucia and her beautiful friend. The band was good but finished at 11:30 pm. The dj was one of the good ones.

I got quite tired because of my achy feet but also the vibe just died after the band finished which is such a shame. The place was half empty by the time I left at 1:30 ish. Still in all I had a nice time dancing with some regulars and catching up.

Lucia’s friend had a partner and I noticed he had a tattoo with Hebrew writing. He told me he is not Jewish but grew up Lutheran and his first wife was Catholic. So after his marriage broke down he got the tattoo which says “6:12 God only disappoints the ones He loves the most!”. He said he was still attending Mass at the time.

I nodded. I poked his shoulder and said “the lord has their finger on you! They never quite let us go.” I said “I hear you on the disappointment but it’s funny how we “chosen ones” find each other in the most strangest of spaces!”

I showed him my tattoo with Ehyeh Asher Ehyeh “I am who I am Becoming” as I am still a work in progress. He liked that.

I felt comforted in a way. God is watching over me in His usual peculiar way. Disappointment or no disappointment I feel grateful and blessed.

I noticed one of the security guards watching me have a conversation with the lovely man. I guess they are puzzled as I rarely engage with men but I figure this guy was safe as he is dating a friend.

Maybe my love self hypnosis thing is helping me open up a little more and actually talk to random men. It’s been years since I did that. No agendas, just being convivial and showing interest in people in general. It’s actually lovely quite frankly.

I still have a long way to go until I let myself fall in love or reclaim my once joyous sexuality. But I am content with my slowly blossoming evolving self right now.

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7 May 2021

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(Another group that I failed at cobbling together. I was supported by both Lyn and Jarrod however!)

A REMINDER: TOMORROW!

Dear friends,

The next Sacred Space Spiritual Circle will be held at Point Halloran (near Victoria Point) on Saturday 8 May 2021 3-5 pm.

The topic will be Ghosts. Have you seen them? Have they had any influence on your life or were they just ephemeral Apparitions?

Bring a blanket or yoga mat to sit on. Something warm to wear as the late afternoons are getting cooler.

Bring something to eat if you wish to picnic or munch on something while we socialise.

A $5 donation is appreciated or another energy exchange such as a story, an offering to the fae (flowers, shells, coral or gold beads that we could cast into the sea), or other suitable ancestral offerings. (No milk in the sea or fresh running waters as this is offensive to the Fae as it contaminates their water).

I conduct a smudging for all participants at the beginning of each circle.

All walks of life and faiths are welcome. I only ask that everyone brings a positive openminded attitude and treats each member of the group with respect.

This is a friendship circle which I hope expands to a regular group of people passionate about the more spiritual and metaphysical aspects of our lives on earth.

I look forward to Seeing you on 8 May!

In the meantime, be well, be happy and be blessed by the gods of your understanding.

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Integration. With personal integrity (albeit isolationist and marginalised!) comes a renewed vigour and a blossoming in my psyche. A heart opening and newly enervated creativity.

Who knew? All those perverted evil BDSM bastards that tried to destroy me in various dance spaces and in my own family of origin, in jobs and in hospitals where I went for surgeries, vulnerable and ill but never truly weak unlike those in positions of authority who subvert their own hippocratic oath like the befouled Hypocrites they truly are.

The former lovers who were just psychopathic borderlines and rapists and Attempted murderers. The Sado-masochistic Dybbuk-ridden but ultimately weak men, saturated in their own spite, envy and insecurities, destructive in their modii operandii. Filthy and pathetic!

Who knew? Alas poor Tanya she knew them well but was too brutally broken by early childhood trauma to know better. To discern the carrion bloodletting of lust-driven men and their henchwomen.

She gave away too many fucks for Fuck-starved cloven-footed men who carried no light, no love and no honour for her.

Who knew? Who could predict in all my worst nightmares what monstrousities of human waste I would need to overcome, to get over, to grow in variegated stages of post trauma like a plant in the little shop of horrors. To devour my own ghastly pain and transmute it into something approximating the Divine. (A work in progress! - giggles)

Eat me?!......in Wonderland (wunderbar, innit!) little Tanya is holding Alice’s hand and spinning in Infinity with the Angels in concentric circles of a great washing machine-type cyclonic action, divesting herself of dross and integrating only the most precious, most Worthy aspects and people that have merited a place in her heart (and body).

My enemies shall choke on their own bespittled hate that they cast upon me with their penii, their slanders, and their own treacherous strangling hands.

I am waiting for the divine retribution to be fully enacted upon those still living. 😉. I can wait. I have seen the glory of my god when He showed me how loved I truly am by those beings of interdimensionality that wrought vengeance on Gila.

There is still a “hit list”. A few new names added to it. But yes...I can wait. I waited out my own grief and my own rage like a storm at sea...tempestuous and precarious and like all forces of nature...unpredictable and uncontrollable.

Lightning never strikes twice in the same place, they say. But The Tanya knows that is not strictly true.

The same enemies that have thought they got away with everything they did to me... will face their own Hag one day.

And with my avenging angels encircling that Hag and piling on the furies experienced by me and no doubt other survivors of these bleak and perverted and mostly useless individuals there will be no mercy: unless they exhibit a change in behaviour and a sincere sacred and heartfelt apology.

I won’t wait for that though. Not one of them had the personal integrity or the good grace to be sorry. Instead they harboured new recruits of hatred with their poisonous wormtongues and toxic fuming vaginas.

I have to laugh. It’s almost too funny. But I am happily awaiting my retributions, invested and protected by the gods.

They are tweaking my spirit, even now…as my body, ravaged by pain and others’ sordid capricious cruelties grows inevitably more frail and enters the new dimension of death!

My angels are lifting me up and throwing me into a higher realm of dimension where I am beautiful, successful, wise, and truly deeply loved by other mortals whose troths they ply are decent and true and who would never deign to hurt me.

I rise in an Ecstatic Dance of my own making, I twirl in my own shamanic healing trance of an awakened psychedelic dreamer.

I shimmer and gleam in my newly cleaned and polished crystallised cloak of many colours: my auric field, expanded and glistening like a newly formed Butterfly. My last Becoming: will be brief but glorious.

I embrace the past with compassion for my own Becoming and I welcome the future that is brought to me in every moment as a yet unrevealed but tantalising gift.

In the eternal now I breathe light and a Love that could not be raped, stymied, sabotaged, slaughtered or desecrated by Knaves.

I rise and rise, expecting the inevitable fall that besets all mortals. But this has been a slowly unfurling Uprising. It’s been years in the making.

A phosphorescent glow in the night. A thinly masked and shielded fabulousness by day.

I am not afraid to Be the best version of me anymore.

7 May 2020

11:11 am. Synchronicities falling this and fast! What’s shaking, babies!

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11:11pm my angels remind me to enjoy the sweetness of my life in the ends of my days or the day’s end. ;-)

7 May 2019

Update 7 May 2020: On Monday Crystal brought me all her old odd tarot cards (many were my mother’s) so I sorted through them last night, burnt the damaged ones. I will make more cards for jewellery holders.

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“...and there’s Angels in the architecture, spinning in infinity and we say...HALLELUJAH”.

I woke up (a second time tonight) with that lyric in my head.

The Holy One sending me missives of grace and bedazzlement. Amen v’ selah 🙂

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7 May 2017

3 am home from a night's dancing with Jenny and Karen. Utterly exhausted. Everything hurts. So in my bath, decompressing (decompensating? Destressing?) and unfurling my feet.

Hard to imagine that I have been doing this most weekends for over 6 years now. Madness!! Still Single, sexy and free of epic bullshit. Might continue that way for a long time too.

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I have spent the afternoon slashing down my dragonfruit cactus as it was non-productive (23 years old). The flowers were lovely but it simply refused to set fruit. (I understand completely, having retired my own uterus almost 10 years ago and released my fruity offspring like spores to the four winds.)

Our fecund days are over, dragonfruit and me. She might put forth new growth, so might I. We might co-create in other more surprising and less labour-intensive ways. Giving birth to new loves, creative projects, takes patience and time.

But for now I am tired and sweaty and craving something nice to eat. Hmmm.

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Not coping tonight. Can someone who loves me send me a hug? Cheers fanx a lot :-)

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Truth. So terribly tragic that my father left me only footsteps of blood-stained muck. Evil bastard.

But never mind. I am practising Ho'oponopono. "I love you, please forgive me, I'm sorry, thank you". So far all I feel is horribly bereft. But soul healing takes time. Sometimes an instant and sometimes eons. I am Done!

7 May 2016

4.34 am. Home from a wonderful night dancing with my gorgeous friends. Jo came all the way from The Gap to pick me up and dropped me home again. A few friends, Karen, Kirsty and Sally each bought me a drink. I feel thoroughly spoiled.

Alter Ego was playing and after they finished at 2.30 am our favourite dj, James strutted his stuff. We all had a great night.

I am tired but really grateful and happy for all the gifts the universe has bestowed upon me in recent weeks. Thank you, Hashem and Thank you to my human Earth Angels who raise me up when I fall in heap. You are amazing!

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2.53pm. Finally awake. I had to wash my goose-down doona again as Beauregard pissed on it and it soaked into the mattress. I sprayed vinegar on the mattress, covered it with a towel and threw some other blankets on top of me. I love that puppy but sometimes he is a pain in the tochus (arse).

Mostly the doona was still clean so I just washed the pee-pee section as washing it so much is destroying it. It is a beautiful warm afternoon.

My feet are still tingly and jangly from last night's dancing but I had fun. I might lie in the grass with my puppy keister!

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11.27 pm Trying to stay home and be a good girl. Beauregard was just curled up beside me, gazing up into my eyes. Guilt-trip, canine style.

I have considered taking him to the city to introduce him to George the busker and my homeless friends, then walking across the bridge to Southbank and back.

Tempting. But my muscles ache and I already walked him to the dog park this arvo. He got to play with his feisty gf Tess the King Charles Cavalier. Also Leo.

7 May 2014

Feeling very happy and baking bread and butter pudding! Yum! Hope it turns out ok as it's my favourite.

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Omg Vikings... Blood Eagle. Astonishing indeed!

7 May 2013

I saw the Sleep/respiratory Specialist this morning. He is recommending that I get to keep my Drivers License as long as I don't drive tired or for longer than 3 hours a day. Phew! So happy!

I spent the rest of day and evening with Lyn. We had a nice relaxing day and Lyn bought us Indian food for dinner. I had my favourite Mango Chicken 🙂.

7 May 2011

Quiet day! A beautiful stunning clear blue sky, a warm sunny day, no wind, everything in perfect order in the Universe. I even played some lovely music. Life is good!

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I woke up to find my gold Torc, newly rediscovered in the Lemon Myrtle Tree after being missing for a month, tossed off on the floor! I was bemused as this means I must have been tossing and turning so actively that I took it off in my sleep!

I love this bangle...it's a symbol of my status as a Warrior, a celtic symbol that Scottish warriors traditionally wore, way back in time.

I'm not going to lose this again, I hope! I've fought too many battles, just to be me, to lose my Torc now! LOL. I'm also glad I don't have to get a new Torc made as it would take a lot of gold and be very expensive to get made. Sigh!

Copyright Tanya Désirée Arons