Memories: 15 April 2025

15 April 2025

Another day in Paradise!

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15 April 2024

15 April 2023

https://youtu.be/GNgdDkWvhiU

https://youtu.be/PeOGekjE9KI

15 April 2022

Happy Passover, Happy Easter, Happy Ishtar, Happy Ramadan.

Let there be Peace in all the Worlds. Blessings, safety, truest deepest Loves, Abundance and most importantly Freedom. Freedom to be the best version of whom you are, Freedom to manifest all that you need and perhaps even more so you can enjoy the freedom from money worries.

Freedom to choose the person you most aspire to be and freedom to surround yourself in love, in light, in dignity, surrounded by a likeminded community, family, friends, partners who See you, Value you, Cherish you, and Delight in you.

“Let my people go!”

15 April 2021

7:42 am waiting for the man who bought my former mother’s crystal Candelabra to pick it up.

It is an exquisite piece but I am manifesting a new life, hoping to find my nîche and eventually start a silversmithing business (or something equally creative and satisfying!)

So I needed the money to buy tools and other silversmithing equipment.

Letting go of Gisela’s opulence does kinda hurt. But my life needs radical change and I need to get out of my poverty trap that she so cunningly and viciously forced me into. I am sure I paid for that candelabra with my own trauma as a child and as an adult woman.

So fuck it...it can just gooo!

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Adrian who bought the candelabra was such a kind gorgeous man. He said “start your silversmithing hobby and commit to it and when you feel you are struggling...fight for it! Too many people give up on their dreams too easily!”

He said he too had suffered immensely and we are like wild weeds and the gods just won’t let us die...so it’s time to thrive!

How delightful that he completely resonated with me! A complete stranger!

He also said “there is love out there for you Tanya when you can trust again and try to keep your heart open. But he said he had a much better saner happier life when he was on his own. No cheating, Lying, backstabbing or robbing!”

I looked at him and said “that is exactly where I am at now. I am quite alone but have beautiful soulful cherished friends and my beautiful garden and I function much better alone! But I need to find a way to make money from my talents and get out of the god awful poverty trap!”

So that was an astonishing connection so early in the morning!

He said “you are very much loved and although there are so many so many god awful people out in the world, there are some truly kind good ones too!”

I smiled and said “yes and I am grateful to have them as friends!”

I just had a wee epiphany. Trauma survivors surround ourselves with the trappings of wealth and success, constantly filling our innate void imposed on us by the fates.

But ultimately the only true wealth and opulence and beauty comes from deep within our souls and we have to cast off the dross and pain that guarded our true gems by going Supernova!

Shine bright like a diamond forged by pressure beautiful beautiful sacred Stars!

Our earth needs you to step into your Light!

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She came up on my birthday, a gift from the Fae, on a Brindabella rose bush that has struggled to survive for several years that I thought might actually die! So I left the bloom on the wee bush a bit longer so the plant could rejoice in its blossoming.

But removing it for my own selfish vanity might give the plant a chance to create more blooms. (Or is this its last fecund Hurrah?!)

Life is beautiful...even in the last blossoming!

I am grateful and blessed to be here, in this moment!

I just dug in the tulips, hyacinths, and jonquil bulbs. I scraped some potting mix to put on top of the jonquils as there is not enough soil where I planted them under the golden rain tree.

To my astonishment there were big fat earthworms in it. They had flashes of electric blue colours on their skin! I thought “ye gods...am I like...high?!” But looked again. It’s real! I raced in to get this iPhone to take a photo but I am uploading a video.

I will try to take a photo when it’s done!

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People not Things. Heart wealth not manifested greed. Love and light! Not smite and spite.

Oh and as my Viking Volver rune reader gifted me with these potent energies: “harvest” and “flow”.

The Tanya is ready to receive her gifts from the multiverses and to create beauty and grace and to be joyous and carefree and manifest more love and light than she ever thought possible!

(But first I gotta lie down as I am excited for my new ventures and my new psychedelic dreaming...silly as a wheel but delightful!)

15 April 2020

I lay down as I am worried about Crystal who is sick but not answering her phone...I don’t know if she has covid but she had tonsillitis and now has a runny nose and migraines. I can’t check on her as I don’t know her apartment number.

So freaked out a bit given the weird fucked up times we are living in.

Anyway Bobo literally came and curled up above my head. So there is some comfort in that!

When everything goes to shit, and you can’t rely on your daughter to communicate. There is a dog.

I hope she is okay.

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15 April 2019

Gahhh set alarm. Snoozed through it 3 times. Asked Siri to set again for 7 am. It failed. Woke up at 7:30 am. Panic dressed, scrubbed teeth, sent dog out to pee.

Made it at PA at 8:02 am. Fuck early appointments. Herded in like sheep here. I am really not well so this is an extra burden. But yay, they offered tea facilities so drinking tea in the waiting room and looking forward to getting back home and crawling back into bed. Noice!

It was interesting watching an entitled German couple try to push in front of a very dignified and beautiful older Indian woman behind me in the queue. I set my shoulders very square in preparation for a fight.

The German woman moved behind me and pressed against my handbag which was slung on my shoulder so I gently pushed back without turning to look at her. She got the message very quickly. Lol.

I felt a little triggered as my mother Gisela was also an inveterate queue-jumper with zero respect for other humans. But never fuck with a German jewish nzer viking heathen who is angry sleepy hungry and has fucking gallstones. In a tiny voice “my bile is rising!”

What convenient excuse will I have for my ire when my gallbladder is excised?! None. None at all. I will make it up according to the situation and continue in my life plan to avoid most people.

15 April 2018

Yesterday was powerful and magical. I went through so many different peaks and troughs in my personal energy and emotions. From feeling tired with a severe headache to being uplifted in the strong male arms of a stranger and thrown into the air but held strong and fierce and brought back to my stilletoed feet and whirling dervishing my dance of a madwoman into the night.

There are many things I have lacked in life and many things I still aspire to, but being surrounded by loving supportive friends and even strangers who are able to express their innate power and joy and wildness in a fun way (with harm to none!) is my greatest delight in my life.

I have always longed for Love and Recognition or perhaps that is the wrong word...self acceptance. It has often been torn from me by the most cruel and bizarre circumstances beyond my control.

But I sense a deep change in me, that all the wonderful blessings I have longed for were/are already inside me and I have finally tapped into that deep powerful Source of profoundly humbling, almost worshipful grace and beauty, honour and power.

Like a Spirograph Of circles flowing all around me, in the encounter with the I and the Thou, swirling magnificently and often seemingly always watching from the outside, clawing at the See-through walls, gasping for air and for my Turn, I have lived to witness the Return. Flowing freely and with gentleness.

Moving on is not the same thing as Giving up. My heart belongs to me and you and cosmic consciousness and we are all so connected by a thread of life force and meaning and bliss.

I have survived because I have not let go of the Dreaming in a time of Being and the psychedelic dance healed my body as much as it was harmed by it. The hedonistic revelry that seemed so senseless and selfish and sensual healed the broken hearts and minds with humour and hubris and hugely delicious delights.

Sometimes we fell, calamitously and clamourously but other times we flew. On the wings of angels/eagles/human intervention.

Blessèd be to the Thrivers, the Singers of the Songlines of our land and heart, the thinkers, the Builders of the adytum and the Healers, the Dreamers and alright, alright (Giggles) the Tossers!

Know who you are before the evils of our times fucked you up and over then come out to play! We are here for you! Children of the universe. Masters of our own Destinies and Bearers of Love and Light which blossoms beautifully.

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I had a wonderful weekend with my joyous, carefree, wild friends. At O’Malleys a young Irishman (soon to be a new father) so was celebrating the last of his life, free of nocturnal screaming, Hobbit-tossed me in the air. I was amused!

We all danced wildly then it got too hot (no air con at O’Malleys) so we then moved on to Brooklyn Standard which was too crowded but much cooler!

At O’Malleys there were a bunch of singers and jammers playing the Irish tin whistle, a ukelele and banjo. They sung some traditional Irish songs and the usual pop songs. It was quite lovely.

I taught one of the young Irish men how to dance Israeli style (the hora!). Well, sort of. Hahahaha. Very nice fellows. I explained Israeli dancing is like Irish dancing only more Russian and emphatic! (Less lyrical than Irish folk dancing). Not that I am an expert on folk dancing myself, mind! Which made it even more insanely funny.

We started the evening at 5 pm and were home by midnight. We were all exhausted but happy!

15 April 2017

It's a gorgeous morning. I have had a shower and washed my hair. Charlie has given himself a bath in his water bowl. The dog is at my feet, as usual. The cats are sunning themselves.

The chickens are chickening out and the fish are swishing about in their private worlds. Lucky fish. The garden is smiling at the sunshine which threatens occasionally to cloud over but so far is choosing Light.

The Tanya is relatively happy. I had Whittakers chocolate and the most beautiful yoghurt gifted me by the beautiful Sally. (I cannot be trusted with chocolate in the house but hey, I am going down in a blaze of glorious delectable delights).

I gave some yoghurt to the bird but he liked the sweetness but not the texture. Yoghurt is meant to be good for chickens so it surely won't hurt Charlie. I am trying to get his leg feathers to come back to their former glory.

The little buggar won't eat the spinach I bought him for vitamin b. Hmmm. I like a critter that knows his own mind but this one is stubborn. (Like The Tanya!)

So we are sitting under the market umbrella, and Charlie is twittering away as he nibbles on his nectar mix. I am on the laptop.

All is good chez moi. Toda Raba. Alles Gut and Ka pai. Astubleift (?) not sure how to spell Dutch so will give it up for now.

(Thank you, all good, good. My pleasure)

15 April 2016

6.09 pm. Been outside cleaning the scoria of all the red dust. 1 bag done. 5 bags to go. Blimey! Bit of a task! It will be worth it. I wonder what veges I can grow? Maybe an Eggplant and some celery! Not much room for big bushy plants in a bathtub.

I can always grow more herbs too.

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Finally out of bed. I am so fatigued from months of coughing my guts out and now the bronchitis is very mild at last, my body just wants to sleep, warm and snuggly on my pillow top, doona cocoon.

I have arisen from my bed chamber to hang out washing, clear some rubbish I burnt off outside and to motivate myself for a night dancing with Jo. I haven't seen her at the casino since she got a new man so it will be lovely to dance with her again and perhaps meet her Beau.

I look forward to a good night out but my lungs are still squeezing so it won't be as epic as it usually is. The Tanya is slowing down a lot.

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15 April 2012

Exhausted! Crystal went to hospital tonight due to a Reflux Attack. Scary! She is being sent home so it wasn't heart related as I feared.

Our lives are so full of Chaos, Stress. I wonder how much more must we endure? For now I am relieved that my girl is fine but her health issues will need thorough investigations.

15 April 2011

Feeling hideously tired after today's events. I must have been more anxious than I thought! I suppose a sensible woman would go to bed right now, but somehow I don't want to, even though I'm sleepy. Silly woman!

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15 April 2009

Squish, Pop, Cicero, Uh Uh, Not Guilty and All that Jazz.

Copyright Tanya Désirée Arons