How To Assemble The Perfect Team Based On Mirror Theory

In everyday life, we often hear: all people around you are mirrors, but what is this connected with? Why is it possible to get along well with some employees in the team, while communication with others is one continuous pain and irritation? With the help of the theory of mirrors, it will be possible to see yourself in employees, to understand how to choose them not only in terms of business functions but also in terms of complementing your own qualities. In the ideal picture, the team should have people who compensate for your weak spots and reinforce the sides that you are proud of and are inspired by.

Scientific fact: a person notices what he is focused on. It seems to him that everyone around him dreams of becoming a leader, launching a startup, if this is on his agenda. Repeating the same scenario every day, he arrives at the same results. To achieve the desired goal, it is important to see yourself from the outside, this will help the theory of “mirrors”.

We celebrate in others what is already in use, even if it is in its infancy, like a seed ready to sprout. For example, you admire strong leaders who speak beautifully, brightly from the stage, appear on TV. You want to be one of them, which means that you already have qualities that will help you achieve what you want. Another example of leadership is Lady Diana, you are attracted to her by the ability to take care of everyone, kindness, cordiality, which means that you would like to develop just such a potential in yourself. You need to understand what kind of leader you are and start strengthening these qualities with the help of a team.

1. Mirror of Inspiration.

You are a founder of a startup, a top manager, a novice leader. Think right now, what examples of leaders inspire you?

At one of the training, as leadership examples, the girl named the main character “The Devil Wears Prada” for her ability to set high ambitious goals, perseverance, and exactingness. Another participant named Mahatma Gandhi as her ideal leader, with his ability to negotiate peacefully, the art of calmly and respectfully explaining her point of view to the interlocutor. Further, both girls told how this understanding helped each of them to realize in what style they would like to lead the team.

2. Mirror of Shadow.

For example, you understand that this type of employee is the most difficult for you to communicate with. They cause strong reactions in you, you don’t know how to interact with them. No action on your part helps to establish a connection with them. Think about what your qualities are similar to a particular employee. What are you trying not to notice about yourself? What annoys you? What main characters of films do you absolutely dislike? What do you treat with contempt, disgust? It is useful to ask the question: what have I once forbidden myself?

At the training, the girl complained about the client, who expressed all emotions in correspondence. He wrote 30 messages after 10 pm, violating personal boundaries. I asked: does she allow herself to express emotions? The girl was offended and said that it was not ethical. After a long conversation, she agreed that it is quite ethical and useful to express your point of view, to voice emotions, but you should not be rude. As soon as the ban on expressing her emotions went away, the client stopped being annoying, rude, saw personal boundaries, and received feedback on her actions.

3. Mirror of Attraction.

The Mirror of Attraction is able to show the qualities — “seeds” — sprouting, they will help to make life full, bright and bring a feeling of satisfaction. For example, you look with interest and envy at a female leader who runs a company and has three children. It is helpful to think about what exactly am I jealous of? How can I achieve the same? In this situation, it is necessary to build an action plan on how to achieve a balance between personal life and work.

This mirror is often blocked by feelings of shame, guilt since we have been taught that envy, is a harmful feeling. Suppressing it in oneself, a person often cannot give an account of what exactly he is jealous of, what is the resource, the potential for development?

4. Mirror of Power.

Mirrors show a unique combination of our strengths. If we think that we do not have the qualities that leaders have, we need to try to see their beginnings in ourselves and start developing.

How to find mirrors in yourself, to strengthen your talents?

1. Choose a Mirror (Inspiration / Shadow / Attraction / Force) and describe its vivid qualities. Think about which hero you associate with him.
2. To assess how developed these qualities are at the moment?
3. Remember these qualities, apply them in everyday situations.
4. Faced with a problem, ask yourself the question: “How can I use the qualities 100%”?

It is important to develop and nurture talents. It has been proven empirically that training strengths have a much greater effect than “pumping” weaknesses.