How People Label Me Just Because I am From Montenegro

Those who read my articles know I enjoy writing about various cultures, traditions, and history. I often write about my favourite region in Europe — the Balkans, and especially about my beloved Montenegro.

Without meaning to say the obvious, there is something magnificent about Montenegro. You may ask, what?

Montenegro’s culture! It is just fascinating as the country itself. From unusual beliefs to distinctive behaviours the culture is one of the country’s most charming characteristics.

Unfortunately, not everybody thinks that. I have been faced with prejudice and false beliefs about Montenegro on many occasions. So I have made it my goal to break down these ugly stereotypes and judgments about Montenegro and its people and present Montenegro for what it truly is.

Magnificent.

Here are some of the most absurd questions I have been asked about Montenegro and its people.

Is Montenegro “dangerous”?

Love this one. Yes, of course, it is! There is too much danger that will get you captivated with all that there is to explore. It is very dangerous to eat Montenegro’s tasty food, to be fascinated with the history and beautiful landscapes.

It will be dangerous to see pretty people and enjoy the great atmosphere all around. Especially if you are married!

Now more seriously — no it’s not dangerous. In spite of the wars of the 1990s, there is absolutely no evidence that people in the Balkans tend to be more violent than people elsewhere.

It’s nothing more dangerous than other countries. In certain aspects, it’s even way safer than the majority of Western countries.

Is Montenegro a “poor” country?

Europeans tend to have a false belief about Montenegro being a poorer country just because they are not a part of the European Union. However, the life of the citizens is definitely not worse because of that.

As a matter of fact, Montenegro is home to rich people. A tiny Balkan country is emerging as the preferred destination for the world’s richest people.

Montenegro is one of the most popular travel destinations among billionaires and also home to a growing population of the ultra-wealthy.

So, yeah actually many of the European Union citizens and Westerners actually can’t afford to live in Montenegro.

Yes, I had to rub it in.

Are Montenegrins “agressive” ?

A few weeks back I engaged in small talk with a colleague from Austin, Texas. Somehow we touched on the topic of Montenegro. I asked: “Have you ever been to Montenegro? It’s so beautiful!”

“Nope, I’ve heard that they there are known to be aggressive”.

What?!

I wanted to defend Montenegro but then I thought — in doing so I may be perceived as an “aggressive defender”. Therefore, I let it be. Later that evening I started my research. Where has this belief come from?!

I found a statement made by no other than the know-it-all Mr Donald Trump.

“Montenegro is a tiny country with very strong people… they have aggressive people. They may get aggressive, and congratulations, you’re in World War III.”

No. Montenegrins are not as scary as everyone thinks. We are just straightforward. You won’t see us being diplomatic asking you nicely to leave when you are standing in our way, but we definitely won’t beat the shit out of you unless you are the one who starts the fight.

Montenegrins are warm and nice people who know how to enjoy life. Around them you can have your own opinion, you can disagree with them, you can joke, and as long as you respect them you will have no problem: they will treat you the same way and even better.

Except for Trump, they may actually beat him up.

Are Montenegrins “inhospitable”?

I’ve heard this stupid question only once, a long time ago.

Look, hospitality is a serious business in Montenegro. The entire Balkan region is renowned for its hospitality, and the people of Montenegro are truly a part of this.

If you find yourself lucky enough to be invited into the home of a Montenegrin, my advice is not to eat for a day before. You will be plied with food and drink until there is nothing left, regardless of the financial position of your host. Further Montenegrins like giving presents and often pay for the entire bill after a meal. They always try to give the guest undivided attention.

They will go out of their way to make sure a good time is had by all, and nothing is going to get in the way of that.

There is no such a thing as too much hospitality in Montenegro.

People of Montenegro are particularly passionate when it comes to celebrations or any other gatherings. Weddings, birthdays, christenings, graduations, and more are greeted with genuine excitement and joy.

No celebration is as intensely honoured as the funeral in Montenegro. Attendance is mandatory, eating and drinking are obligatory.

Are Montenegrin women “shallow”?

Appearance is everything in the Balkans, and in Montenegro in particular. If your neighbour gets a new car, you’ll have to get out and buy a slightly shinier one. The appearance of abundance is just as if not more important than its actual existence.

When you walk down the streets of Montenegro, you will be astonished at how beautiful everyone is. People care about how they look here, especially women. I’ve been told quite often by my own parents that “beauty requires sacrifice”.

Almost every Montenegrin girl once in her lifetime hears from their female relatives that it is necessary to suffer uncomfortable high heels and restrictive diets as long as it delivers results — looking beautiful.

Sometimes this can put up too much pressure on women in Montenegro but when compared to the “loose” approach I see in some of the Western countries I would always prefer to care about appearance, as that means caring about yourself.

Often though, I end up feeling distinctively average when in Montenegro. Perhaps, that is why I often tend to spend time in the West — receiving compliments.

Are Montenegrin’s “rebellious”?

Okay, Montenegrins have never played nice with those in power, be it the Ottoman leaders in the 17th century or international alliances in the 20th.

We don’t like to be told what to do, especially by countries perceived as trying to police the world. Montenegrins are a very proud people.

There is one very peculiar trait in Montenegrin culture, we are extremely suspicious of anyone who neglects to make eye contact in an important conversation. What are they trying to hide?

It is of great importance that you hold a Montenegrin’s glare if you wish to be trusted.

There is also a unique warrior culture in Montenegro, called “humanity and bravery’”— in other words, chivalry. In the past, it inspired soldiers to fight to the death rather than abandon their mates to the enemy.

Today, don’t expect a Montenegrin to back down from a fight, especially if the honour is at stake.

Honour is everything in Montenegro. When born into a Montenegrin family you are taught from an early age the most important cultural values, which many believe, define your future.

There is no respect without integrity, dignity, sacrifice, and humility, and there is nothing without respect.

This idea might not be as strong among modern generations in Montenegro, but I tend to honour it as it is the typical Montenegrin way, and it is my way.

Now, what are the other questions you may have about Montenegro or me?

Thank you for reading.

This article was originally published here.