How I Built Self-Confidence to Succeed as a Writer

I've never been one who exuded a grand level of self-confidence, especially when it came to writing. I never really thought of myself as an expert or even as an amateur in most cases. But over the past decade, I've made incredible leaps and bounds to become the success I am today.

And I have no intention of slowing down.

Though, it wasn't something I accomplished overnight. Seriously, spending 35 years thinking poorly of yourself is a lot of conditioning to break down. However, I was able to do it and have experienced some of the most amazing things since.

It All Started with Micro-Goals

At the beginning of my writing career, I created small goals for myself. The idea was to build my skills to a point where I could quit my $8-per-hour job at the school district and write full time.

So, I would start with simply writing more words today than I did yesterday. Even if it was by a single word, it was still moving in the right direction.

I went from a goal of 1,000 words per day to aiming for 10,000 words at my peak while using content mills like Textbroker. Though, it did take a bit more than a year to start building that kind of momentum. The point is that I kept progressing until I reached those goals, which resulted in making far more money.

And it wasn't just typing words, either. I would make small adjustments throughout the day to change how I viewed my potential of being a writer. I started keeping track of the amount of time I spent focussing on my writing career while slowly expanding what I could offer clients.

The purpose of these micro-goals was to build a sense of pride in my accomplishments regardless of size. With each success, I slowly began to realize my own abilities, which helped fuel a sense of self-confidence.

Instead of being timid about my writing, I knew exactly what I could accomplish.

I Stopped Judging Myself

OK, let's move it away from client work on content mills. Although I was able to quit my job at the school district, I still wanted to do more with my writing. That's when I decided to put more effort into being creative.

This was another aspect of me that needed some severe work. I can't count the number of stories I've never finished, deleted, or thrown away because I didn't think they were good enough.

That is the wrong mindset to have on a myriad of levels.

For one thing, who gave me the right to determine what other people are going to like? I cannot read the minds of others, so it was quite arrogant of me to think my story would suck from their point of view.

Instead of judging myself, I've long decided to let others be the judge. And if there is something they didn't like about my story or writing style, I would examine their complaint and decide if there is anything I can do to improve.

Though, that's kind of a slippery slope. People are going to hate your work for the sake of hating. The trick is to scrutinize their criticism and determine if it's something valid or just the rantings of a troll who has nothing better to do with his or her time.

Once I decided to stop judging myself, I've accomplished far more than I would have thought. Primarily, I was able to publish my first book and look forward to seeing what else I can create.

Instead of dreading what people would think, I decided I'm going to tell the story I want to tell. Sure, they don't always perform well with the masses. But at least I'm in the game.

I Decided to Never Settle

In the beginning, I often focused on doing the bare minimum to advance or make just enough money to pay the bills. I was settling on just what I needed to survive.

Now, this isn't necessarily bad depending on your goals and aspirations. Some people are perfectly content in where they are in life regardless if others think it's a waste or not.

However, I decided I was tired of just doing the bare minimum to get by.

That's when I started putting in a lot of effort to build myself up as a writer in every regard. I wanted to learn more about blogging, freelancing, and creative writing. Instead of just being able to afford gas in the car, I want to be able to buy a new monitor without stressing about finances should mine decide to crap out.

Once I made that decision, a lot more started clicking into place. I now have an awesome job with a variety of side projects that are constantly growing. While I still don't make massive amounts of money, I am happy with where I am and look forward to where I'm going.

And that's the underlying point...being happy.

I'm Constantly in a State of Self-Improvement

I am in a constant state of improving myself whether it's related to my career or my health. It's all about wondering just how far I can push myself to reach that next milestone.

Because I know that if I want to get more out of life, I need to keep moving forward. The good and fun things aren't going to fall out of the sky, through my roof, and into my lap.

If I want those awesome things to happen, I have to put in the effort to make them happen.

Every morning, I take a look at what I want to do that will take my writing career forward one more step. Then, I put in the effort to take that step to build onto what I already have. And each day, I get closer and closer to another milestone, all the while helping others do what I do for a living.

This sense of self-improvement is driven by those micro-goals I was telling you about a minute or two ago. As you build momentum and start seeing your progress, the level of self-confidence increases. You begin believing that you can accomplish those things you want in life. Doubt and apathy begin to take a backseat to hope and drive.

Began Being Realistic with My Skills and Aspirations

Perhaps the most influential element to boosting my self-confidence centers around being realistic. Now, this is kind of difficult to achieve as many are incapable of looking at themselves objectively. However, honesty about what you want to accomplish and who you are right now can be extremely beneficial.

For example, I had no idea what I was doing in the beginning. I didn't know the first thing about AP Style writing and had no misconception about making a ton of money as an online writer. This didn't mean I was being down on myself. It was simply the realism of the situation. I knew I needed to learn more if I want to succeed.

When I published A Freelancer's Tale, I knew it wasn't going to be a best-seller or even a semi-popular book. Mostly because it's an autobiography about me and how I got started as a writer while dealing with the worst bout of depression in my life. I'm not a household name, nor am I overly popular with social circles. This isn't a dig at me, but a realization of my popularity. So, I didn't expect riches. I just geek out over the fact that I now have a book on my bookshelf with my name on the spine.

You can be realistic about yourself without dwelling on the negative elements. Like I said, it's not easy to look at yourself objectively. Especially for someone who has a long history of impostor syndrome or an incredibly low self-esteem.

Once you're able to see those parts of yourself, you get a feel of what you can offer and where you need work. No one is perfect, and I am still working on things about myself to keep the momentum going forward. It's the way I view myself nowadays that makes the biggest difference.

It's Not a Quick Fix

Boosting your self-confidence isn't something that is going to happen overnight. Depending on who you are, it will take a lot of work to get to a point where you're comfortable with yourself.

But it can be done.

One of the most important parts of the process is patience. Get out of the mindset of instant gratification. Work towards becoming the person you want to be, even if it's just taking those small simple steps in the beginning.

Because there is a whole world out there for you to explore. Not being confident in yourself will only take away a lot of those grand experiences.