Dear Diary

So I got a call...

"I finally got the phone you had always wanted, the Galaxy s22 Ultra, it's amazing...do you want an exchange? Or do you want something else - An iPhone 14 pro max, maybe..."

"See me o," I said to myself. At that time, my phone screen just cracked, I had just lost some money she wanted to use in fixing it and she was looking a gift horse in the mouth!

I paused for a sec...and then I remembered I was trying to reassess something and possibly bring things to an end if absolutely necessary.

So, I declined. I didn't want anything to cloud my decision or be saddled with a Trojan horse that will only keep me in the place I was currently in. If I was going to stay, let it be because I want to stay not because I feel indebted or obliged.

So it behoves me when I hear girls say they went shopping or tripping with some dude and they have no plans of accepting his proposal for a relationship.

Shopping o! Not a lunch date!!!

I've met guys who swore to change my life, one even promised to make my house then "paradise on Earth" 😄.

Another promised me trips around everywhere and so on...

One stopped in his tracks after I asked him to define what he wanted -and had declined his "mouth-watering" offer seeing that he had the money to spend. I wasn't interested in a relationship or anything so keep your gifts and trips.

According to him, "Jane, you have a good heart; you don't have guile". I was surprised.

Why do you collect gifts from a man you have no iota of feelings for? What stops you from turning down offers when you know the person's true intentions?

If after a first date and I don't want to be with you, you will know. Why hide it? To get cash or gifts? How much na? Why lead a person on just to gain something from them and run away? Are you a thief?

And men, why do you try to buy a woman's favour by showing off? Someone says she doesn't want you or your gifts, and you insist and practically force it. She accepts, and then you get mad that you were taken advantage of because your expectations weren't met. Are you crazy? Abeg, that is "At owner risk". If you get lucky, oh well. If you don't, take it in good stride.

I have a close friend who wants to do almost everything for me. I have declined and declined all the relationship offers but he pleaded to allow him to do the little he can to make my life better even though we never date. According to him he admires me and doesn't want someone to take advantage of me. Oya na, who doesn't like 'better thing'? 😂😂

One day, it was getting too much and I called him, Uncle what do you want????

Uncle was beginning to have renewed expectations, hehe. "Princess I want to be your maga! With the full benefits of a maga!". You know that mindset of 'Maybe if I do enough she will pity me and then.....'. I no fit laugh that day.

Anyway, I had to start the reset therapy. Now they don't have my time again, lol, at least I don't feel like a debtor. Neither will I like to start exchanging sex for enjoyment anytime soon. That's dehumanising in every aspect.

Learn to do things because you want to, not because of things. That way your mind will be clearer and you will never be a slave.

No matter how rich or whatever a person is, date them FIRST because you like them at least, you're not a whore! (If you are, this message is not for you, 😂). That way you can walk when situations no longer favour you.

Stop giving things and people power over you.

What you don't want to pay for, don't collect from the shop.

Uncles, when a customer says they won't pay, don't force it on them...And then expect something at the end.

Finally, ask for definitions biko, saves you a lot of Tom and Jerry games.

End of rant lol