Uncle Hasan the Elder – Part 12: “The Preemptive Panic Strategy”

Every family has that one person who seems to operate on a logic entirely their own—but somehow, it always works out for them. In ours, that person is Uncle Hasan. Part strategist, part philosopher, part charming troublemaker, and just a dash forgetful.

One afternoon, I was at their house when I suddenly heard Uncle Hasan shout from his room: “Where’s my birth certificate?! It was just here in my drawer!”

Panic mode: activated.

Within seconds, he was on a mission—digging through drawers, shaking out folders, and mildly accusing his wife:

“How many times have I said, don’t organize my stuff without telling me! My drawer. My desk. My system.”

His wife rolled her eyes with the kind of patience that comes only from years of dealing with Uncle Hasan’s dramatic episodes. Still, the search party was mobilized. Everyone started scanning every folder, flipping through books, checking the usual “lost item” hiding spots—under the couch cushions, inside cookbooks, and even in the fridge (just in case).

About ten minutes in, Auntie walked back into the room holding a folder.

“Hassan. It’s right here. Exactly where it’s always been, with our other documents.”

Uncle Hasan blinked, took it from her hand, looked relieved, and said warmly:

“Thank you, dear. You’re a lifesaver. Now I can relax.”

Then, turning to me like he was about to reveal a state secret, he said:

“Truth is, I wasn’t sure it was actually lost. But you always panic first—just in case.”

I stared at him. “Wait. So you didn’t know it was lost?”

He smiled.

“Exactly. That’s the point. If you wait too long and it’s truly gone, people say you’re careless. But if you panic early, then either you find it and look proactive, or it’s actually lost and no one blames you because you tried.”

This was classic Uncle Hasan logic.

Then he added something even more shocking:

“I do the same thing at work.”

Apparently, whenever he couldn’t find a file or forgot a deadline, he had a tactic. He’d start the day by saying loudly,

“Oh no, I think one of my folders got deleted. Something’s missing from my computer!”

Now, if he really had missed a deadline or messed something up, he could blame it on the ‘deleted folder.’ And if everything was fine? No harm done. Everyone just thought he was being extra careful.

“It’s a win-win,” he said, sipping his tea proudly. “Either I save face, or I look like the guy who catches issues early. No one can say I’m forgetful because I beat them to it.”

I had to admit—it was genius.

And sure enough, a few weeks later, I found myself using the exact same strategy. My manager gave me a new project, and without thinking, I said:

“Hmm… not sure if this is doable, but I’ll take a crack at it.”

In truth, I wasn’t confident at all. And as fate would have it, the project hit a wall. But when I updated my manager, I said:

“Yeah, unfortunately, it didn’t pan out—just as I suspected from the beginning.” To my surprise, he nodded and replied,

“Well, good you gave it a try. Let’s move on to the next thing.” No blame. No disappointment. Just… smooth sailing.

At that moment, I felt like I had unlocked a secret weapon. I silently thanked Uncle Hasan for passing on this “preemptive panic strategy.” It’s now one of the many tools I carry into daily life—right next to “arrive fashionably late” and “distract with chocolate.”

If life is a game, Uncle Hasan’s not just playing, he’s several moves ahead.