Types of Hunger

I am feeling a bit nervous because I fear that you would laugh at me after reading this piece. Therefore, I will write no more unless you make a pinky promise not to make fun of me. So put your right hand on your heart, yes right hand even if you are left-handed, and say it aloud three times: “I swear not to laugh at Mr. Solo”. You have exactly one minute.

Hey, why are you reading it without making your vows? Good, now you can read further. After much careful but non-scientific thought, I have categorized hunger into three distinct categories. And for all those philosophical minds out there, here hunger means the normal feeling that every living thing feels when its belly is empty. And for all those keen readers, yes, my name is Solo. There were no special or deep reasons behind naming me Solo. My mom says that the day I was born there were no other reported births anywhere on planet Earth. Could you believe it? I can’t. My date of birth is December 33, 1925. So, let me know if you ever find someone born on that day. Anyway, enough of the chronicles about my name. Now allow me to shed some more light on three types of hunger.

First, there is neutral hunger. Why the name neutral hunger? Well, I just wanted to sound like a researcher or scientific person. The best thing about this type is that if you are feeling it then it does not matter much whether you nourish yourself or not. For example, you might feel it around 10 or 11 in the morning, of course, if you were kind enough to wake up and finish your breakfast before 8.00 AM. But neutral hunger can knock on your belly like an uninvited guest at any time in the day or night. And if you are a foodie like me then perhaps you could feel it just five minutes after a meal. You can kill it with one or two ordinary biscuits, sweet or salty, and you can ignore it easily; hence, the name is neutral hunger.

The third type of hunger is called good hunger. Wait, where is the second type? Do not worry, although born in 1925 my memory is still razor-sharp when it comes to counting. I am talking about good hunger because I love it and I hate the second type of hunger. In good hunger, every round shape object feels like an apple or watermelon depending upon the size, and every cardboard box looks like a food delivery box. All those feelings of dislike for a particular food vanish and each food item becomes your favorite. You just want something to eat and whatever you happen to find tastes so damn good. And, before I go on, I want to mention this ‘There is a lot of hunger and food insecurity in the world so waste nothing on your plate and never miss the chance to feed the poor’. Even a homemade sandwich with just raw onions and tomatoes tastes like McDonald’s. I love this hunger so much that I sometimes skip a few meals just to feel it. Perhaps, you should do it as well if you always feel full.

You know I have written a lot today and now I am feeling bored. And maybe you are feeling bored of reading at this point. So, I will just wrap up things in a few sentences. The third type is called ugly hunger. Actually, it is a mixture of boredom, which we are experiencing now, and hunger. In this hunger, you want to eat something at all costs, and that something which you want to eat must be something delicious and should be your favorite food. Nothing simple and ordinary would satisfy you. Every salad tastes bad, and if you are like me, every chicken wing looks gold. I think you got my point. So, try not to eat too much in a single meal; otherwise, you might become victim to this dangerous hunger in the next meal. Sadly, I feel ugly hunger now. Over and out.

‘Good hunger is the best hunger’