RAINING CATS & DOGS

5.30am on a cold Winter’s morning, chores for the day to be completed. Flo sighed the moment she opened her bedroom curtains. The rain poured and Bailey, her old, fluffy Sheep dog had to be walked. Once dressed, flinging on any old sweater, she grabbed him, as he bounded for joy, even at his age, this dog still acted like a puppy. Who had this much energy at 5.30am on a Monday morning anyway?

Raincoat on, she led Bailey out the front door, as he pulled tightly at the lead she was holding, so much so, her palms were red raw. With difficulty, Flo managed to lock the door, open the gate and head towards the park, Bailey’s favourite place judging by how excitable he was getting. Flo only lived around the corner, but today, walking there felt like eternity in such a heavy downpour.

“Make it a quick!” She cried out, bending down to detach his lead from his collar. “Do your business, then come back!”

She knew he couldn’t understand, but she hoped that somewhere inside his little brain, he might not want to get his fur wet, perhaps that was just her, from a human’s perspective.

The minutes ticked by. Flo stood like a fool in the middle of an open field, while trees blew in the wind. The rain poured down her back, and she was now completely soaked. Staring at her phone, she counted down the minutes since he left.

“Come on! How long does it take to poop, you stupid dog…”

Flo couldn’t wait any longer, standing twiddling her thumbs, while her prince raced off having the time of his life.

Flo, with Bailey’s lead in hand, headed off in the direction he had vanished. Over by the large oak tree, that had been growing for decades, was a bench propped up by the trunk. As Flo headed towards shelter, she could see quite clearly, someone sat with their legs crossed over the top of each other. It soon became apparent, that what she had initially thought was a small man sat on the bench, was in fact Bailey.

“I’m sorry, I’ll go back to bed, I must be dreaming.” Flo stood glaring at her Sheep dog, sat upright crossed legged.

“You’re not asleep.” Bailey said calmly. “Please, sit with me.”

Dumbfounded, Flo did as her pet told her. With wobbly legs, she edged towards him and gingerly sat as far as she could from him, staring at him warely.

“What is happening?” She kept on repeating, opening and closing her eyes.

“Would you like me to pinch you so that you know this is real?” As it happened, Bailey was quite polite. Either Flo had trained him well, or he really was a respectable gentleman.

Uncertain, Flo shook her head. She tried to smile back but only creepy teeth showed.

“Just one thing Flo, please don’t smile, it’s off putting.”

Flo had no clue what was happening. In the blink of an eye, she was doing her dog’s bidding.

“Thank You, that is much better, now, I shall explain.”

“Please do…” Was all Flo managed to say.

With one of his paws, Bailey stretched over and took Flo’s hand, she felt so uncomfortable, you could cut the tension with a knife.

Bailey looked into her eyes and spoke very clearly. “You have heard the phrase; it’s raining cats and dogs.”

“Yes, but...”

Bailey put his paw to her mouth. The hairs from his fur got caught in her lips, which almost made her gag.

“Ssshh now, let me explain. The phrase ‘It’s raining cats and dogs’ doesn’t mean it’s raining a lot, to us, it means we come alive, we become more human in the rain!”

“That may be so.” Flo rose to her feet. “But have you been to the toilet yet, because I am going to be late for work!”

“As a matter of fact, I did, I used one of those disgusting human cubicles, and no, before you ask, nobody saw.”

Flo was at a loss for words. She needed to sit back down in case she fainted from the shock. She shook her head in disbelief. “Well, I don’t know what to say after that. Come on, let’s get home, see if this rain washes away whatever this is.”

The park was surprisingly quiet. Perhaps she was in a coma, fell down the stairs and this was all playing out as she lay in a hospital bed. No humans about, but what looked like a small ginger cat walking upright.

“Mittens!” Bailey shouted over, cupping his paws around his mouth.

Mittens came bounding over with excitement. It seemed the rain could even create friendships between cats and dogs.

“Bailey, how are you doing?”

“Good, good. By the way, this is my owner, Flo.”

Mittens stretched out one ginger paw for her to shake. As though it was the most normal thing in the world, she shook it.

“This is a rare sight for you to see.” Mittens continued. “Not many of you get to see this side of us, they refuse to go out in this downpour.”

“And you don’t mind that we see you like this?” Flo asked.

Mittens shook her head. “We don’t care, it’s just you’re always too busy to notice, anyway, Bailey, must dash, need to catch some mice!”

Mittens vanished down the road. Bailey stood on his hind legs and brushed away the excess fur, and in that moment, the heavy rainfall ceased, as though it hadn’t even rained today. Bailey fell back into a four-legged position and started barking in Flo’s face, as if it was her imagination playing tricks.

Flo had no time to wonder what had happened in the last few minutes, work would be calling her, shouting why she wasn’t in the office yet. She grabbed hold of the lead tightly and made her way out of the park, just like any other Monday morning.