Beautiful

People only envy you if your important, rich, or beautiful. Otherwise, your simply a nobody. Important people are movie stars, rock stars, doctors, lawyers, and politicians. I have all three things going me. I am beautiful lawyer, who happens to be filthy rich.

When I first went to law school, I was bound and determined to become a prosecutor. I knew I would get off putting assholes behind bars. I loved watching crime shows. Criminals pissed me off and it made me happy when justice was served. I would be angry at drunk drivers. I hated murders, child abusers, and rapist. Now, those are the people I defend. I found out that prosecutors don’t make shit compared to defense lawyers.

I have won quite a few high profile cases and have defended the worst type of people. The worst person was a man who scalped their victims before slicing their throat. He killed a total of six people. I knew he was batshit crazy but not insane. He knew what he was doing. It was a nice win for me. Got him off off on an insanity plea. His daddy is a well paid politician so I got a lot of money on that case. I would be scared shitless if that fucker got out of the mental institution. Definitely wouldn’t be walking down a dark alley when he gets out.

Now, I know it ain’t right, but I have to calm my nerves sometimes before I go into the courtroom. So I either take a shot of brandy or smoke a little pot, and sometimes both. It’s legal, but I am sure I could get disbarred if the word came out. But what would be worse, me stumbling over my words like a babbling idiot , or being calm and cool. I chew gum to get the smell off my breath and I sit outside for a little bit so I don’t smell like a skunk when I walk into the courtroom.

Today is the day I take a shot and smoke a joint. I have a really tough case, plus Marcie is a damn good prosecutor. I knew my client was wasted out of her mind when she was driving, but the other driver literally ran the stop sign. My client will lose her license for sure because it’s her fourth DUI. I am not getting paid for her to keep her license, but I am getting paid to keep her out of jail. It would look bad on the mayor of our city if his precious little daughter was put behind bars. The media would be all over that shit. Who cares if the other driver has a broken leg and can’t work to pay his bills. Happens all the time. Especially, if you happen to be a nobody.

I saw Marcie park her 2018 Blue Kia Rio next to my 2023 Hot Red Ford Mustang Shelby GT500. Bitch gets out of her car and kicks my fucking tire. She then flips off my car as if she’s pissed off at it or something. I was wondering why she was looking around before she did all that. She’s crazy. Probably jealous ‘cause she is leasing her car and my car is paid off. She should’ve been a defense lawyer like me. She looks good though.

Marcie and I use to be best friends since middle school. That was before I changed my mind. I like money. You just gotta make sure you’re safe and lock your doors at night. Plus, you have to watch out for those crazy drivers. Especially if there drunk or high.

Marcie walksed up the stairs to go into the courthouse. She walked right by me and acted like she didnt see me. Damn her . I started to say something, but I coughed instead. She didn’t stop like I hoped she would. She kept on walking.

Marcie and I didn’t have to battle it out in court. So happy ‘cause I smoked a little too much pot. I was stoned out I’d my mind and wasn’t sure I would have been able to defend my client properly. Neither of our clients showed up for court. It helped that my client’s rich daddy paid off the other driver.

As I was about to drive off on my car, I saw Marcie stand next to her Kia. Her face was flushed and her eyes were puffy. I knew her very well and could tell she had been crying. I rolled down my window when she looked right at me.

“Remember when you and I used to talk about how victims deserved justice?” Marcie asked.

“Yes. We had fun didn’t we? All those crime shows we watched together. Let’s get something to eat.” I smile.

Marcie shook her head. “What happened to you?” She gets in her car and starts the engine.

As I see her piece of shit Kia drive away, I hang my beautiful head out of my beautiful car window and yell, “Money, you stupid bitch!” I sit in my car awhile and can’t help to think how much I miss her.