What to Do About His Ex

So you're with this great guy and everything is going well. He is the sweetest guy and treats you like a queen. There's just one problem. His ex. You knew her. She knows you. In fact, you met them when they were still together in college cross country practice and you were on the team as well. But it was different then. You saw him more as a friend and he always seemed unobtainable. It's been years and you and him are talking again and decide it's time to post you two together on Instagram. Now that you are with him, do you ask about her? Do you tell him to delete her off social media? These questions are slowly killing you on the inside.

What if he still talks to her and they are still friends or more? All these thoughts are running through your head. And your friends aren’t helping the situation. They are adding fuel to the fire of your doubts by trying to convince you not to trust him so much. He graduate's college, a significant hallmark in his life and guess who comments on his post on Facebook? His ex. Why hasn't she moved on? Every post, there she is, liking, creeping, lingering. Is this normal? You want to comment a snarky remark to show that he is yours and for her to leave him the hell alone. But you know you will just look like the bad guy. You've had nightmares about her. In every dream he is always leaving you and running back to her. This causes anxiety in your real life and worse insecurity in your relationship. Wake up! You know the dreams you are having are untrue and he will always choose you at the end of the day. And if not, know your worth and don’t settle for anything less than being treated like a queen. You know he is someone you can grow with and possibly have a family with in the future so don’t let your real life dreams out of reach by feeding into false, anxious thoughts.

What to do about his ex? Do not do a damn thing. Move on and let it go. Do not message her or show her any attention because that is what she wants. Confront him about it, or don't. It's up to you. You don’t really like her but you don’t really hate her. She wasn’t always the nicest person to her in the past but you hardly know her. A part of you wants your voice to be heard and tell her to, “Back off! He’s Mine!!!!!” You wonder what her problem is and why she is still lingering around his Instagram page after five years. Delete her off of social media if it helps you have a clearer mind. To have a healthier relationship with your boyfriend, it will help if you tell him what is bothering you and what is on your mind. If he does not listen or acknowledge your feelings, maybe he is not the right one for you. Listen to your intuition. Stick to your instincts about your relationship with your man and don’t let anything get in the way of the both of you. It is not easy dating someone who's ex was an acquaintance, but you can't help who you fall in love with. Maybe you’re too uncomfortable to be with him any longer because of their past. Time will tell, but don’t waste it if you know it’s not going to get you anywhere in the future. Is he the one or not? How do you really feel about this situation? Be real with him and yourself.