To Rebound or Not to Rebound

For quite some time now I have tried to move past a connection with someone who means a great deal to me. I have tried to do this in the healthiest way possible: by focusing on myself and healing what was broken (emotionally & mentally). I have reflected on the mistakes I made with him and myself, and how I can avoid repeating them again with new relationships.

Even though it's been a while since I was truly with this person I still feel so intensely about him. We've kept in contact on and off which has been nice, I've had moments where I felt at ease with the ending of our relationship, but I've also missed it immensely and couldn't picture sharing my life with anyone else but him.

He's just someone I can't seem to get past. 

I'm sure many of you have had that one person who has impacted you in such a way that no one else has done before. There's an intensity that comes with these types of connections, or perhaps that's just my own beliefs, maybe he does not feel the same way. I wouldn't be surprised if that were the case.

In many ways I have moved on from him - I no longer am in love with him or hold any resentment - but I still feel very connected or maybe it's the feeling of attachment. Whatever it is I need to move on because it's clear he has no intention of coming back and being with me in that way, so I need to push myself forward and away from all of this.

In truth I was hoping for a sign that eventually we'd be together, I was happy to have fun with him until we both felt ready but you can't wait for someone who doesn't see a future with you.

So, does this mean it's time to get a rebound? Is it time to find someone new? I'm usually not one for rebounds. In all honesty I did it once and I regretted it.

What I'd prefer is a relationship - and I'm sure rebounds can turn into that if you like the person enough. Perhaps it's time to open myself up to someone new and hopefully, it turns into something more. Actually I'd be happy to start a new relationship with someone I really like, even if it means letting go of someone I care so deeply about.

I'm very picky with who I choose to open my heart to because it takes a while for me to start liking someone. When I get to know someone I like to drag out their truth first and see who they really are before I invest time into connecting with them. 

And as risky as relationships can be - you either spend the rest of your life together or you end up breaking up -but I think that sort of risk is so worth it. To be in love and have a bond with someone is one of the most beautiful things on this earth. You get to create a life together, it's such an exciting thing to do with someone you love.

Perhaps it is time for me to start searching for "the one" even though I believed I had already found him. It was a relationship I'll cherish for years to come as I learned a lot because of him. It's just disappointing that it had to end.

But life is too short not to take a risk when it comes to love, so I guess that is what I'll be doing.

Wish me luck.