They Didn’t Listen: How a Philly Entrepreneur Is Fighting for Her Life—And Being Heard

“Something’s Not Right”

Carmen Wilkes didn’t feel like herself. For over a year, the thriving business owner behind Lash House in Philadelphia had been dealing with unexplained pain in her armpit and chest. She went to her doctors. She scheduled mammograms. But every time, the results came back clear.

“They kept telling me I was fine,” she said. “But I knew my body was trying to tell me something.”

The pain never left. Instead, it intensified—until one night, Carmen found herself in the emergency room. That visit led to another mammogram, and this time she sought a second opinion.

One week later, everything changed.

The Diagnosis Came Late—But Fast

Carmen was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer. Aggressive. Urgent. Life-threatening. In the same week, doctors inserted a port into her neck and began emergency chemotherapy.

“I couldn’t believe it,” she said. “I get mammograms every year. How could it be this far along?”

That question—how something so serious could go unnoticed for so long—is one Carmen continues to wrestle with. And she’s not alone.

Medical Dismissal Is a Crisis—Especially for Black Women

According to the CDC, Black women are 40% more likely to die from breast cancer than white women. Delayed diagnoses, overlooked symptoms, and implicit bias in medical treatment are well-documented realities.

A 2022 report by the Susan G. Komen Foundation found that Black women often receive care later, are less likely to be offered advanced screenings, and have their pain underreported or dismissed.

“If I hadn’t switched doctors,” Carmen said, “I might not be here. That’s what hurts the most. They didn’t listen—until it was almost too late.”

The Red Devil and the Battle Within

Carmen’s first round of chemotherapy included doxorubicin—a powerful drug with such harsh side effects, it’s been nicknamed The Red Devil. Each session lasted 90 minutes and left her physically and emotionally drained.

Now, she’s in a second phase of treatment that involves 5.5-hour chemo infusions every other week. The toll on her body is staggering.

“There are days I don’t think I can do this,” she said. “But I push through. For my kids. For my husband. For my faith.”

When the Hair Falls

As her body fought back, her hair began to fall out in clumps. For Carmen, who had always worn her hair long, thick, and flowing, it was a breaking point.

“I couldn’t watch it fall piece by piece,” she said. “So I shaved it all off. It was the only thing I could control.”

The decision wasn’t just about hair—it was about reclaiming power in a situation where so much was being taken from her.

Strength in Motion

Despite the pain, Carmen hasn’t stopped showing up. She’s still running her business, still working with clients and staff, and still mothering her children—all while fighting for her life.

“Some days, I don’t know how I do it. But I do.”

She’s also preparing for a double mastectomy, lymph node removal, and radiation. The road ahead is long—but she’s walking it with grace, faith, and fire.

More Than Survival—It’s a Stand

Carmen’s story isn’t just one of survival—it’s a call to action. A call for women, especially Black women, to advocate for their health. A call for doctors to listen better. A call for the medical system to do better.

She hopes by sharing her truth, other women won’t have to wait as long—or suffer as much—to be heard.

“I cry. I struggle. I pray. But I’m still here,” she said. “And I want my story to remind others: you know your body. Don’t stop until someone listens.”

Support Black Women’s Health. Share Carmen’s Story. Follow @lashhousephilly for updates on her journey and how to support.