The Things I Hope To Find In You.

To the Someone, Somewhere, Someday.

These are the things I hope to find in you.

Someone who understands the difference in someone wanting to know you and someone who wants to understand you.

Someone who returns and appreciates my efforts tenfold in ways I never could have imagined.

Someone who doesn't just say they understand it but shows it.

Someone who understands how to embody the meaning of reciprocation.

Someone who values humility over ego. Yet someone who doesn't lack confidence but displays no conceit.

Someone who navigates conflict with the outcome of clarity as the end goal. Someone who communicates with purpose, intention.

Someone who has made peace, found peace with the parts of their past that were unfair. The pieces that once left them in pieces.

Someone who has taken the time to heal and grow, to become a version of themselves where they are able to pause in the space that lives between trigger and reaction.

Someone who can find the balance between finding the space that they need and the space that respect you in the midst of the moment.

Someone who has created the space within themselves to find clarity in the things they feel rather than be consumed.

Someone who can remain calm in the confusion that is happening inside of them and navigate within themselves to a place to respond with clarity.

Someone who has healed to be able to separate the things they feels that are enabling versus the things that are evolving them, the things that they need to allow to move through the space and the things they need to leave in it.

Someone who has gained the emotional intelligence to know how to implement this during turbulent moments.

Someone who has created the space to heal to hold the habit of reflecting before reacting, pausing; processing.

Someone who can find that space, thrive in that space.

Someone who intentionally will find that space to be uncomfortable, to challenge themselves. To grow. To be better.

Someone who can sit in the discomfort without fear of it becoming them. Someone who can find comfort in that discomfort because they know it is the only way to grow.

Someone who is able to choose to communicate when it’s hard. Someone who can choose to self soothe when it’s hard. Someone who can reflect in the chaos of their external, and their internal worlds and navigate what is their own and what isn’t.

Someone who has learned to have the capacity, the bandwidth to hold not only theirs but also space for another’s feelings.

Someone who is honest even when it’s uncomfortable. Someone who stays even when it's uncomfortable.

Someone who doesn’t keep score

Someone who understands two truths can coexist without it needing to be a competition.

Someone who understands you are not villainizing someone by identifying a toxic behavior as a toxic behavior.

Someone who comes from the place of communicating to want to understand, never to judge.

Someone who welcomes someone else challenging them, holding them accountable, and holding space for honesty and transparency about their thoughts and feelings.

Someone who has taken the time to heal to be able to know what they feel, identify the places they come from, and are able to communicate those things in a healthy way.

Someone who has matured enough to stay calm in the chaos, in fights and disagreements.

Someone who cares more about repairing than being right or running when things get uncomfortable and conflict inevitably arises.

Someone who takes the time to clarify without jumping to conclusions, to be curious and calm. Someone who holds space for us both to be right, and to be wrong.

Someone who can understand that respect and disagreement can coexist and are essential.

Someone who understands that sometimes you have to see the grey but that we both deserve clarity, always.

Someone who understands two truths can coexist without it needing to be a competition, without it ever being an attack.

Someone who understands you are not villainizing someone by identifying a toxic behavior as a toxic behavior.

Someone who shows that kindness, patience, and understanding are at the forefront of the way they choose to communicate.

Someone who works to cultivate and create a safe space. Where questions and curiosity aren’t met with defensiveness and shutting down.

Someone who understands what open communication is and works to build transparency and trust not to curb their insecurities.

Someone who understands what truly good healthy and open communication is and what it looks like and shows that.

Someone who doesn't think good communication is in constant communication or in constant daily updates but in meaningful communication and transparency.

Someone who understands how to be direct and honest while also being considerate and respectful of another's feelings.

Someone who is more concerned with understanding than being right, than winning.

Someone who wants to communicate with me and not at me, not against me.

Someone who cares more about finding middle ground than being stuck in their own ways.

Someone who openly expresses and communicates the things they feel and think, regardless of whether it is good or bad. But, also someone who knows how to communicate with kindness.

Someone who understands the difference in avoidance and boundaries and where they both stem from. When it is appropriate to hold space, to take space, and to go about it in a respectful way to your partner.

Someone who understands the difference in behaving from a place of self respect and reacting from a place of fear.

Someone who understands boundaries are about self respect and not a personal attack or punishment.

Someone who jumps to finding clarity before conclusions.

Someone who can understand that it isn’t attacking someone personally or their character by identifying and acknowledge a behavior as what it is. It is honesty, it is truth. It doesn’t mean they are more or less but misidentifying the reality of their behavior will only end up hurting you in the end.

Someone capable of accepting instead of averting accountability and responsibilities for the feelings they did and didn't mean to cause.

Someone who can take accountability instead of internalizing things as attacks. Someone who has the capacity to care but still stay objective.

Someone who understands impact over intention.

Someone who is willing and open to changing not who they are but in the ways of compromising to find ways to meet both of our wants and needs.

Someone who takes the time to understand the things that have helped shaped me. The good, the bad, and the ugly. The parts of me that hurt sometimes and is more mindful after.

Someone who is attentive because they would never want me to feel neglected in any way.

Someone who has taken the time to understand and heal their inner child instead of being driven by it.

Someone who is able to self reflect without someone else having to draw reflections for them.

Someone who has worked to learn new pathways to change the patterns of their past, the truth of their traumas.

Someone who has taken the time to identify and taken steps to heal their trauma so they don’t let it bleed over others.

Someone who has learned from their pain so they no longer are led by it.

Someone who doesn’t confuse compassion with codependency because of fear of losing independence, control.

Someone who doesn’t allow their wounds to become another's trauma.

Someone who is aware of their triggers and chooses to protect instead of project them.

Someone who sees that value in the meaningful things in life, the things that actually matter.

Someone who takes pride in holding themselves to a high level of integrity and places value in the character of themselves and others.

Someone who wants me to be heard, seen, and understood that they take the time to ask me questions and fully hear me the first time so I don’t have to repeat myself.

Someone who takes the time. To learn me and understand the ways that will make my life easier, the things that will make me smile, and the perceived needs I might have. To care.

Someone not easily influenced by other people but open to hearing their side and views.

Someone who knows who they are but doesn't place that onto others, someone who allows others to be who they are. Someone who supports others for who they are.

Someone who is a free spirit but also values structure and understands the principles behind things.

Someone who values experiences as much as I do. Someone who looks for the excitement in life but doesn't chase it.

Someone who is thoughtful, considerate, and mindful.

Someone who understand that thing are "that deep" but only if you are. Someone who looks for that in a meaningful way.

Someone who understands that we can only connect as deeply with others as we are connected with ourselves.

Someone whose calmness comes from maturity not from complacency.

Someone who doesn't spread themselves thin. Someone who is honest with themselves.

Someone who rations the care that they can give so that they can pour more into the things and people they truly do care about.

Someone who shows genuine appreciation and is unafraid to express it. Someone who notices the things that I do to go the extra miles for them. Someone who recognizes my actions, my thoughtfulness, and my consideration. Someone who notices.

Someone who appreciate my creativity even if they aren’t the same way.

Someone who loves in the little things and loves that I do too. Someone who values the little things in life, in the fleeting moments of this life. In the little ways that we choose each other, that we support each other.

Someone who values how something makes me feel more than what they want in the moment.

Someone who considers my comfort. Someone who values my perspective as much as their own. Someone who holds my feelings in as much regard as theirs.

Someone who believes in my dream as much as me and inherently understands after learning me ways that they can support me.

Someone who has taken the time to learn how to love themselves, how to accept love from others, and how to not allow themselves to be disrespected.

Someone whose identity isn't attached to things that aren't truly a part of who they are but allow them to live within the comforts of the defense mechanisms of their past.

Someone who takes the time to understand me, all the intricate of how I work, how I think, and how I exist. And someone who shows that comprehension in action.

Someone who is quick to be curious, not quick to judge with an open mind, open heart. Someone who both embodies being soft and strong in how they interact with themselves and others.

Someone who is secure in who they are and what they want out of life.

Someone who holds space and not expectations for either of us to be perfect.

Someone who moves with curiosity and not assumptions. Someone who lives with patience and gives grace.

Someone who responds instead of reacts.

Someone who holds my feelings and heart with as much priority and respect as their own.

Someone who is consistent in all they do. Someone who only ever does what they say and never says what they won’t. Someone who follows through because they are intentional and purposeful with their words and promises so they align with their intentions.

Someone who is honest even when it’s uncomfortable. Someone who doesn’t keep score.

Someone who doesn’t allow their wounds to become my trauma.

Someone who truly understands what a partnership means and what compromise means.

Someone who is protective not possessive.

Someone who is independent and has their own hobbies and allows me space to do my thing and understands the balance in letting me do the things that are meaningful and necessary for my to feel balanced and in us doing things together but doesn’t need to do every single thing together.

Someone who understands the strength that lies in giving a soft love, creating a safe love.

Someone I won't have to ask to be seen by.

Someone I won’t have to teach how to love me, let alone how to love yourself.

Someone who respectfully offers new perspectives and ideas because they want the best for me, to help me evolve.

Someone who challenges and inspires me to be better, to grow more, and be more. Besides me and with me.

Someone who is flexible and adaptable. Someone who isn't so stuck in how they are that they aren't open to change.

Someone who meets me at a minimum where I’m at. Someone who redefines the things I’ve come to expect from others.

Someone who sees and treats me as their equal. Someone who wants more for me in the most genuine sense. Someone who wants more for themselves. Someone who won't settle, in any aspect of life.

Someone who is adventurous but still understands responsibility.

Someone who is sweet and gentle in every sense of the word, in the ways that matter. In how they show up, how they speak, and how they hold my heart.

Someone who makes me laugh and brings out the goofy, silly side of me. Someone who loves my puns and weird quirks.

Someone who won’t dare abandon themselves and the things they love to be able to give love to someone else.

Someone who won’t have to lose themselves to find me.

Someone who has the capacity to show up in the ways that I seek to be loved because they have done the inner work to learn how to show up in the ways they need first.

Someone who finds me only after they have taken the time to find themselves.

Someone who understands that trust is earned not given, built not to be taken.

Someone who undeniably has my back, no matter what.

Someone who is my best friend above all else.

To the you that is out there that will someday find me while in the meantime I will continue to find myself.