The Stigma of dining alone

I’ve always been the kind of person to go places on my own.

If I wanted to do something, I wouldn’t wait around for someone to come with me, I would go off and do it.

It could be somewhere familiar or somewhere new, I love the freedom of being on the move and not knowing exactly what you’ll find next.

I was 15 when I decided to get my naval pieced, I hopped on the bus from my hometown Cirencester to Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, England.

Walked into a shop called Scaramouche which appealed with its leopard print exterior and that day a jewel in my belly button was complete.

That was one of my memorable earlier examples of going off and doing what I wanted to do..and not telling anyone I was doing it!

These days I like to plan less and go with the flow, I often dine out alone, it could be breakfast, brunch, lunch or evening meal, sometimes once I’m out, I will make a day of it and not worry about when I get home.

And now I have my motorhome, a new quest for freedom awaits as I exploring campsites and caravan parks and their facilities.

It was here I had an experience which lead me to question.

How unusual is it to dine alone?

I went for my first breakfast at a campsite diner, took a seat and waited for the menu.

No menu arrived, I saw other diners walk in and receive a menu, a couple and a family, but still I received no greeting and no menu.

Was I invisible as a solo diner?

After around 10 minutes, I decided to go up and ask. The lady apologised and said she thought I was waiting for someone else to arrive!

I didn’t give comment, I just wanted to order my Vegetarian English Breakfast and feel I was as welcome as the person who came in before me.

If somebody was self conscious of venturing out on their own, this may have put them off the whole damn experience of trying again!

For me, it was an ‘aha’ moment.

Societies assumption, a women in her 40’s can’t be single? Or dine alone?

And it’s not the only experience where I’ve been met with an unusual greeting.

I was out on the road and fancied a Sunday pub lunch, a nice chocolate box style cottage pub appealed as I drove past and I had no booking.

I walked through the pubs tiny ‘oldy woldy’ front door with the bar and bartender directly ahead.

Asked if a table was available and for a menu...’Just you on your own, is it?’ As if he was waiting for a husband and family and kids to trail behind me! Maybe he felt sorry I was by myself.

The freedom of travelling alone, experiencing living in the moment without distraction of another is a joy.

Being comfortable with yourself in doing whatever you want to do is a blessing.

I have met so many people on the road, with fascinating stories.

I’m currently writing ‘The Motorhome Diaries’ with all my travelling stories.

Victoria Day-Joel x