The Pros & Cons of Living as a Couple During the Pandemic

I decided to move to Canada literally one week before the pandemic hit. While it’s great that, finally, we got to be together, I also realized down the road that is being stuck at home all the time 24/7 brings its own challenge.

If you are experiencing the same, please know that I feel you. I’d jump into a zoom call with you just to say that I can relate to whatever you are feeling.

While it’s more challenging to keep the relationship during the pandemic, it’s no doubt that these pros and cons have helped us strengthen our relationship at the same time.

PROs:

Having someone to talk/laugh with

It’s no surprise that this pandemic has made us feel lonelier than we’ve ever been before and having someone at home that I can spend time with, means a lot.

When we are stressing out or feeling overwhelmed with the pandemic situation that seems to never get better, we like to find small things in our lives that we can be grateful for.

I realized times like this when we can no longer overlook the things that actually bring us joy — that we used to take for granted.

Sharing chores around the house

Before the pandemic, I’ll be the one who mostly does chores because my partner will spend most days at work.

While I already get used to doing it all alone, getting some help here and there feels really nice. Not only that, we have more things to talk about while we are doing our chores around the house.

Understanding my partner more

I’d like to think I knew my partner inside out but this pandemic has shown me that I was wrong.

I didn’t know what he likes to do during his lunch break or seeing him excited about a new project during the working hour.

After a couple of months, I’ve realized even after so many years of being together, you wouldn’t be able to understand your partner 100%. Which is a good thing, meaning there’s always room for you to learn your partner better.

Solving the problem right away

While there are indeed more fights than usual, we found it easier to communicate clearly and respectfully after a fight.

This is mainly because we share space 24/7 so it doesn’t make sense to just play the silent game for days. It also wouldn’t be good for our mental health.

Communication gets easier when you and your partner are closer physically and emotionally. Though this might not apply to everyone because each couple has their own way to solve the problem.

CONs:

Taking the time for yourself sometimes can be challenging

Depend on the understanding level that your partner has for you, but I found during the pandemic this is a bit harder to do.

Mainly because we spend so much time together and sometimes it’s easy to think that we don’t have to make time for ourselves anymore.

I added this to the cons section because I believe that self-care is really important and you certainly can’t put your relationship above yourself. No matter how loving and perfect it seems.

Having more unnecessary arguments

I can’t count on how many times we had arguments over something that doesn’t even make sense.

I could be mad about him forgetting to put the socks in the right place while really I was just stressing out about the monthly reports at work that I had to finish.

Sometimes when we sit down and talk about it a couple of hours later, we just laugh because it just sounds so stupid. We should have communicated it better rather than lashing out randomly.

Sharing space 24/7

While it’s a good thing that we got to be spending a lot of time together, it can also get overwhelming when we constantly at each other presence 27/7 day in day out.

That’s why we like to schedule time apart by him going for a walk and I’ll be cooking at home trying new recipes. This method has worked really well so far and enough to make us have other space for other things in life.

Seeing each other stress about work

My partner is the type of person who will say “it’s pretty smooth” when I ask him how’s his day at work. Mainly because he doesn’t want to think about work anymore once he reaches home.

However, things changed when we started working from home. I’ll see clearly how he stresses out during his work time and I admit it affects how I feel on that day.

The same goes for him who sees me freaking out every time the end of the month approaches because my work tends to get busy during the time.

Small things like these are tricky when we don’t know how to handle it properly. Sometimes it can even result in unnecessary dramas.

Final Thoughts:

The pandemic has definitely changed our relationship in a different direction and we’ve learned a lot for the past 8 months.

If you are currently stuck at home with your partner, here are some tips to make it easier for both of you:

Set clear boundaries to avoid unnecessary misunderstanding

Do not expect your partner to read your mind — communicate regularly

Try to put yourself in your partner’s shoes every time you are about to have an ongoing argument

Take time for yourself and do some self-care at least once a week