The Least Regarded Act of Kindness

I ran down the road bear-foot in the rain. He had hit me again, and again I found myself running away with the full knowledge I would go back once I had run out of breath. Every four or five steps I felt that rebellious piece of tar that refused to lay flat embed itself in my foot. Yet I continued to run. Running from my despair and anguish into the torrential rain to nowhere.

Sometimes we do not understand how a small act of kindness creates a different world for those who receive it. This is the recount of how a young boy’s act of kindness changed my life forever. Not with a coin or with an offering, but with a gesture far much simpler that has stayed in my mind for six years.

He had spent three years grooming me to be a subservient bride. When he struck me the first time, I wanted to support him and show him love and understanding. The same love and understanding I felt he couldn’t show me for the lack of love he felt in his own life. I blamed myself. And some nights, even years later, I still do.

On this particular night, he had split my lip with a single unforgiving blow. I did not speak out of turn, I upheld my duties as his bride, but I could not prevent the stress the rest of the world offered him. All I could offer him was a place to lay his fist. This was yet another night where I was forced to run away. This time in evening. This time in the pouring rain.

My skin knew it was cold, yet my heart felt nothing. For the first few minutes that I ran all I could think was hatred. Vengeful words fell from my lips with every breath and I tasted not only my regret, but the cleansing rainfall and the metallic sweetness of my own blood. I wished for the rain to wash away the heartache, and although the kiss of rainfall felt sweet and comforting, I knew it would do nothing to drown out the pain I suffered in my heart.

Once the hatred had been drained from my mind, all that came forth was fear and acceptance of the chaos I had subjected myself to out of love. It was at this point I stopped running. I walked slowly in the storm, just as I had walked in the storm that was my own existence. I asked myself questions I already knew the answer to.

Where would I go? I had no where to go.

What did I do wrong? Everything I did was wrong in his eyes.

What can I do to save myself? Nothing.

But while I could not save myself in the long term, in the short term I could find solitude in the rhythmic pace that was the rain falling around me, and the false belief that one day I would be free to not repeat my past mistakes.

I had reached my final moments of defiance. I had accepted that my only option and indeed my fate was to return to the monster who used me as a scape goat for all his inadequacies. I knew I was going to return. I always did. I knew I was not destined for anything better.

And this is where the smallest act of kindness changed my life. Across the road there was a 13-year-old boy, running in the rain with his dog trying to make it home. With nightfall approaching and the storm worsening, I imagine he only worried about what his mother would think if he did not return home soon. I imagine he predicted his mother being frustrated by the smell of wet dog and inflicting a punishment for not being more proactive.

Despite all this, the boy saw not only his destination, but saw me. A twenty-three-year-old women, busted mouth in the pouring rain, with no shoes and clearly no hope. He saw me and smiled, offering a wave a saying “hello”.

Offering a smile, a wave and a salutation is perhaps the simplest and least regarded act of human kindness we can offer. But in a world full of harshness, trials and tribulation, sometimes a simple smile, wave and salutation can change someone’s world. I could not help but smile back to the boy, offer a hello and even a vague hand gesture that could be interpreted as a wave.

It was this moment my life changed. This boy, who knew not the impact of his actions, had in fact reminded me of a truth I had long forgotten. The truth that I was worthy of respect and acknowledgement. The truth that I was something even if I had done nothing to deserve recognition. The truth that if I was worthy of a wave in the pouring rain from a boy desperately trying to get home before their parent’s grounded them, then I was worthy of not being beaten by the man I called my husband.

For this reason, no matter how bad my day or impatient I feel, I take the time to smile and greet the humans I interact with every day. Be it the person serving me at the register, the person waiting for me while I park my car, the taxi driver taking me home after a long night.

The greatest act of human kindness is indeed the one that is least regarded. A simple smile, a simple wave, a simple “hello” can change everything for a person suffering. It can remind them that they are not alone and remind them that they are worthy of being seen. A thirteen-year-old boy whose name I will never know gave me the strength to abandon abuse and change my life. All with a smile, a wave and a simple “hello”.

And so, to all of you reading this now I offer a smile, a wave, and a simple “hello”. Perhaps it won’t change your world, but when it was offered to me, my whole world changed.