Strawberry Cupcakes

Chula Vista San Diego, California February 22nd, 2018:

A week has passed since my relationship ended and my resolve to reside in California and prosper was tested. Foresight may have prevented this situation, or a hint bit more determination and focus. But nevertheless, instead of living in a three-bedroom house with a pool and jacuzzi in the backyard, my home is a tent on the mountain side roughly 200 yards away from the 24HourFitness in Chula Vista. Every day since I left that house, I have rose with the early birds, gathered firewood for later, packed a day bag, traveled up the mountain side to the gym, exercised for an hour or two, showered and then went out in search of a new job. Today, being my sabbath, I decided to relax in the jacuzzi for a bit. Today God gave me an opportunity.

Being a Christian, my studies have always taught me to love everyone. Being raised in a Baptist household, there was a tendency to shun/avoid those of the LGBT community. Today, my pride and true religious beliefs were called to question.

No more than five minutes into my time in the jacuzzi, a large grey haired black man comes strolling in ready to simmer away his stress. Simultaneously, I couldn’t help but notice his unusually sensual glare at me. Wanting to ease the tension, I asked him how his day was. One thing led to another and suddenly we were deep in conversation about life and all its finer things as we sat across from each other neck deep in blissful warmth. He tells me he is a single father who owns and operates a hair salon two miles away. I tell him I am a recently graduated chef out here exploring the world of California. His excitement is overwhelming at this point as he asks about my specialties and capabilities and if I can make deserts and cook duck and most importantly make some quality soul food. In order to bolster my own verbal resume, I say, “of course I can, you tell me what you want to eat, and I can make it for you.” This opened a world of possibilities in his and my mind. Suddenly he comes right out and tells me he needs some help with his 5-year-old son, specifically in the realm of meal prep and general house organization. Attempting not to show desperation, I tell him that I can stop by today and showcase my skills with some fresh strawberry cupcakes. Done deal. The table was set for an opportunity that was much bigger than I ever expected, a genuine friendship.

Now given my situation, there isn’t much room for ignorant reservations but of course, I had them. Everything about this man screamed that he was attracted to me. I mean from the way he looked at me to the way he laughed at absolutely everything, his random comments on my physique, right down to his immediate comfort with us meeting later. For me however, I saw a job opportunity and a way to continue my path to becoming a master chef. Religious reservations aside, I was going to go to this gay man’s house and bake him some damn strawberry cupcakes with fresh whip cream!

A few hours later I was at the grocery store rounding up the necessary ingredients for these cupcakes. Wally had mentioned that he wanted to be healthier and would love the same for his son, but the occasional sweet wouldn’t hurt. So, I took the healthy route with some buckwheat flour, fresh strawberries, all-natural grass-fed butter, whole vanilla beans, whipping cream, fresh mint, the basics for scratch cupcakes with a healthy base. Wally also mentioned that he enjoyed red wine, luckily, I had a brief stint of sommelier studies during my college years, so I chose a classic Chianti DOCG to enjoy after the cupcakes. I figured the medium body and moderately acidic wine would help cleanse the pallet after the sweet and creamy strawberry cupcakes.

It was 5 o’clock, and as planned I was knocking on his front door, grocery bags in hand, with a game plan of making some of the best damn cupcakes this man has ever had in his life. It wasn’t Wally who answered the door though, it was his little son Moziah who answered with their family friend Miss Rhonda. Beautiful smiles from both parties greeted me as Miss Rhonda further confirmed my suspicion of Wallys attraction for me by saying, “Oh this is Chef Steven! He is handsome, come on in.” I blushed and smiled back as I walked into the house, beautiful all white leather couches surrounded by classic pictures and knickknacks, vases, a China cabinet filled with gold rimmed plates and cups, and a black piano in the background were among the first things I saw. First impression, this man really is as bougie as he speaks. But there was comfort in the atmosphere, classic jazz played in the background, small toys lay on the floor, a couple of bottles of wine had already been opened across the room on the kitchen counter and a glass of wine was already in the hands of Mr. Wally who greeted me with a loud, “Welcome to my humble abode Mr. Steven, let me give you a quick tour.” Basic introductions of everyone in the room were given as wally showed me around his home and then I jumped into the kitchen to do what I came to do.

As I prepared the cupcakes, we all sipped wine and got to know each other a little bit more. We talked about past experiences in life, the progression of Wallys naval career that led to him being a cosmetologist, Miss Rhondas currently progressing love life, my own background and aspirations to become a master chef in the future. Simply put, it was a good night. Roughly an hour later after chopping strawberries, chiffonade mint, perfectly whipped cream, and the cupcakes cooled, the finished cakes were ready to be served. “Oh my God Steve, you didn’t disappoint!” says Wally. Even the little man was thoroughly impressed asking for seconds and thirds. They were so impressed, Wally extended me the opportunity to cook for him and his son 5 days out of the week, breakfast and dinner. He asked me how much would be fair. It was at this point something kicked in within me, maybe it was the wine, but I looked at this gray-haired man and said, “Wally, I have to be honest…. I’m homeless right now. I hit a rough patch, my friends bailed on me, my girlfriend wasn’t helping with bills, so I broke up with her. I live in the woods behind 24hourfitness.” Tears stated rolling down my cheeks, I couldn’t contain my emotions and disappointment of my current situation. I couldn’t carry on the charade of confidence I had been holding onto all day. And instead of looking at me with surprise and slight disgust, he looked at me and said, “Steve! Come here, you need a hug!” I embraced him, all of my reservations went out the window as I hugged this man, weak and feeling helpless. Humbled instantly. After our embrace he stepped back and said I could live there and cook for them, not only that but he would pay me a little here and there for cooking and running errands. I was enthralled with joy, humility and gratitude. Our agreement lasted for roughly two and a half months before I found a new place to stay and a couple jobs that could help me pay for my life in San Diego.

That one ironically timed day in the jacuzzi, led to a relationship with a man and his friends and family that continued to bless me for a couple years. When I reached hardship again a year or so later, Wally was there to lend me the back room of his hair salon until I got a job in real-estate. At which point, the apartment I earned, was completely furnished with furniture Wally gave me. Outside of his giving spirit, he was there as a confidant, a hair stylist, and a genuine friend over the stretch of time from 2018 up until I shipped out for bootcamp back in July of 2021. My dear friend Wally passed away at the beginning of December.

I will never forget the lessons I learned from him, the opportunity he gave me to become my truest self, which is a chef who cares about his clients, a Christian who will love and listen before he judges, and a friend who will give whenever and however I can. My hope is that through reading this, others will be inspired to continue with their goals and dreams, and that others may have their hearts softened to the possibilities of getting to know someone knew in a strange way. You might just change each other’s lives for the better.