Sexism in the Craft Industry

I worked in the craft industry for three and a half years, most of that as a retail store manager. I learned a lot about crafts during that time, but what I learned the most is that there is still extreme sexism in the industry. From the customers to the company itself, the sexist attitudes were often appalling, especially from some customers. You could expect some level of idiocy from corporate management—that is normal, even in today’s world. However, everyday people? That was what struck me the hardest, and it angered me every time I heard it.

I knew how to sew going into the job, though only the basics. My grandma was Mennonite and a quilter, and my mom has worked in the garment industry most of my life. I am able to sew straight lines, a proud skill that is not ingrained in everyone. Over my three years as a store manager at the craft store, I took an interest in more sewing and crafts. Thanks to YouTube and various websites, and likely some of my grandma’s genetic influence, I learned how to make a basic quilt. I also taught myself to knit and crochet a couple of years ago (again, with help from the internet), and now my yarn collection rivals my fabric stash.

Obviously, there are more women who sew and craft than men, just as there are more men mechanics than women, but that doesn’t mean they should be segregated by gender. As a kid, I was always a “tomboy,” as we were called back then: I liked to play outside in the dirt, loved my Star Wars toys, and had a large collection of Legos. I also had two younger brothers and my best friend was the neighbor boy. I did not get along well with the girls—they liked to play pretend house and dress up, and then later were interested in makeup and talking about boys’ looks. That was all boring to me. I needed more activity and stimulation. I needed to be outside using up all my energy.

I became a gamer early on, though this was back when girls were not supposed to play video games. When my female friends started making those friendship bracelets of the 1980s, I was playing video games with my best friend, Marc. I was not into crafting just because it wasn’t my thing. I became a tech geek and a writer, not a crafter.

When I started working for the craft company, I told the manager up front that I was not a crafter. I could sew because I had to make pillows in school, one of which came in handy during a boring video in a high school history class. The manager at the craft store needed a key holder and I needed a job. I had experience, my most recent job being the manager of a local wine shop, and she liked that I already knew how to lead and supervise. She promptly offered me the job.

Within the first week, it was obvious that I was out of place. Customers would ask numerous questions about crafts and I had no idea how to answer them. Surely because I was a woman, I knew how to knit and sew, especially in Lebanon, Pennsylvania—an area stuck in times long past. Some customers were friendly about it when I would say I was new, but others would make a comment along the lines of “why did you get a job in a craft store if you don’t know crafts?” The most frustrating part was even if you knew some crafts, there was no way you could know all of them, and to assume that an employee would use their personal time to learn every single craft in the store was both unrealistic and insulting.

Sometimes when I was met with the attitude that I should not be working there because I didn’t know crafts, I simply stated the truth: they wanted someone with experience and I needed a job. This was enough to shut some of them up. The job did not pay much and I had living expenses, so even if I wanted to try something new, I could have never afforded it. The constant insistence from the manager and some of my co-workers that I was going to become a crafter just by working there had the opposite effect: I pushed farther from the craft world and found another job. Unfortunately for me (but lucky for the craft store), the other job quickly turned out to be not worth it, so I stayed at the craft store. Within four months I was offered the chance to be the store manager.

I had experienced some sexism before my promotion to manager, though I was not in the store as much in the beginning. Most of it was not demeaning; simply men insisting that the store was “not my thing,” making it clear that they felt out of place in what was viewed as a woman’s environment. Occasionally I would mention that I too was out of place: a tech geek in a craft store. If they asked why I was there, I told them the truth again: they wanted someone with experience and I needed a job.

There were the customers who gave the feeling that they had a sense of humor and just felt uncomfortable in the store. There was a man who was so insistent that he felt out of place as I was leading him to a product that I turned to him and said "dude, I get it. I don't belong here either. I'm a tech geek." He laughed and relaxed a little. I also remember one particular Mennonite man who kept insisting that his wife would always sew for him, so he didn’t need to learn. I joked that he should know how to sew in case one day he needed to stitch up his own arm. He laughed and admitted that was a valid point.

That isn’t to say that there were no male customers who crafted or sewed. We had one regular customer who started quilting as a way to spend time with his wife and discovered that he enjoyed it. Then there was the man who reminded me of a Viking who liked to knit. Most men would come in for fabric to redo the inside of their car, but there were the rare ones who just liked to craft, like the elder gentleman who made clocks. (Side note: even trying to find an image for this article followed these same sexist ideals, with all photos of people sewing being women and men only shown performing leathercrafting or woodworking.)

We had many women customers who would often say that they needed to hide their purchases from their husbands, or that they did not want their husbands to know how much they spent. I took pleasure in telling those women that I did not have to have permission because I was the one with the income, though I really thought of it as our income. Sometimes I got the impression that these women envied me—a woman who did not need her husband’s permission to spend money. A woman who financially supported her family. An independent woman who managed a store that they loved very much. I could never see myself any other way, not wanting the life that my grandmother or mother had: taking care of children and maintaining the household. That was what my husband wanted to do. In the town of Lebanon, Pennsylvania, surrounded by Mennonites, conservatives, and farmland, that was an odd concept for many people to understand.

The sexism from corporate was as simple as the motto we were given to follow: make it her happy place. Many of the managers found this to be offensive, stating that they had regular customers who were men. One manager told of a regular customer who bought brightly colored thread and other craft items to make his own fly-fishing lures. Then there were the few male managers. The company was making a statement, and it was not sitting well with many of us.

Women within the company were not treated horribly, or at least, not from what I saw. When I became manager, the CEO was a woman. She eventually left and a man took over. That was when the slogan changed, focusing more on women shoppers. I know business and certainly understand target markets, but the change was unnecessary and promoted a sexist environment. Men are just as capable crafters, yet the company was choosing to alienate whatever male customers existed. Most stores ignored the new slogan, replacing “her” with “their,” which was much more welcoming to everyone.

However, the worst sexism definitely came from the customers. From women assuming that only women worked at the store to the police officer who insisted that I sew his uniform because I was a woman. We had multiple male customers insist that we offer sewing services, not understanding that the store was a retail business, not a service center. Most of the time we would roll our eyes covertly at each other when the customer was not looking. Later, after one of our regular customers opened her own seamstress shop, we broke corporate rules and recommended customers looking for sewing services contact her for help. After a couple of months, we were told she was booked solid with business and could not take anymore. I was happy for her.

As with corporate, the customers commonly were sexist against men in the craft world. I had two male employees early in my career as a craft store manager. One eventually left me for a hardware store that paid more money, but the other stayed, his interest in crafting keeping him there. He was a candy maker who delved into various other crafts, mostly painting and later resin casting. He learned to knit using loop yarn when that came to the store, which was the same time (and reason) I decided to finally cave in and try a yarn craft. The loop yarn was perfect for beginner knitters, and my employee had knitted sample swatches for our display so customers could see the different stitches and take an interest in what he thought was a fun craft.

I often spoke with customers curious about the yarn. It was easy to use and was a great introduction to yarn crafts. One particular woman sneered when I mentioned that my employee did the swatches because he liked to knit. I was quite offended by her attitude that a man would knit, almost as if there was something wrong with him because he was a knitter. He was certainly better at it than I was, and yet the customer was insulting the idea that any man could knit and enjoy it. I left her to ponder the idea, hoping that she would realize her narrow-minded thinking was outdated.

After I left that craft store for another job, I actually started to miss the craft industry, or at least the discount I got as an employee. I later took a part-time supervisor job with a different craft store, which actually paid quite a bit more. The sexism there was not as bad, likely because it was more art-focused than quilter-focused, but it still existed. There were more male employees at that store when I was hired, which was nice.

After management changes, the male employees went from about four down to two, including the new manager who seemed to only hire women. As a former craft store manager, I can say with certainty that more women apply than men, likely due to the outdated thinking that men should not craft, but any of the men who were interviewed at that store were never seen again. The single male employee was the same one who worked for me when I was a manager at the other store—the one who like to knit with loop yarn. He was the reason why I applied to the other craft store and why I took the part-time supervisor job. Well, his recommendation that I work there and the fact that I could get a discount again on yarn.

Customers at the new store were also sexist, as they were where I was manager, though in smaller doses. I distinctly remember a woman coming up to me one evening, concerned about a man wandering the store. She kept her daughter close, claiming that she found it odd that a man would even be in the store. I kept my eyes open for some suspicious character casing the joint, but only found a gentleman buying art supplies for his daughter. Perhaps that was a lie and he had been acting suspiciously when the woman saw him—I highly doubted that. Her attitude was that men do not belong in a craft store, just like the attitude of so many other women customers I dealt with over the last five years.

Perhaps others just do not realize they are holding onto some old way of thinking, not realizing that they are bigoted. As a woman who grew up surrounded by men, I guess I see it more than others. Even for the “manly men,” there are plenty of crafts, such as leathercrafting: an expensive, but impressive and possibly lucrative craft, if one becomes good at leatherwork. Crafting should not be viewed as something to keep women and children busy, but as a hobby that builds skills and creates forms of art. Even I had to come around to this way of thinking, forgetting the attitudes ingrained in me since childhood that crafting was “women’s work,” which drove me away from it.

There is potential profit in crafts and the satisfaction that you actually made something. It took me a couple of years to get over my “manly” aversion to it, thinking that sewing made me look weak. Truthfully, it sometimes is a nice distraction when I need a break from technology. I have my own Etsy shop and have sold some of the items I’ve made. It is a satisfying feeling when someone leaves a great review simply because they love the item you worked hard to make. I wish that my husband could find a craft he enjoyed rather than spend most of his free time with his PlayStation. That said, he’s not allowed to touch my sewing machine…or the fabric scissors.