Saturn Return

Dear Superimposed,

It would be more fitting to ask me, “When am I, or, where am I?” rather than, “Who am I?” Who will never be specific enough, nor last long enough to be known; for Who does not belong to any one person, place, or time, and neither do I. If you really want to know me, you must first know where I am located and in what position I exist, as well as know your current position in time and space.

I respond from here, in a place humbled by deep reverence to what cannot be unseen or unknown. This reference point, this kaleidoscope of life, has become known as the inner compass of my own reality. A reality that I have never tried to put into words because I genuinely do not know how to compress eternity onto a page. However, I vow to make the most dedicated attempt to meet you where you are. I will do so with an unapologetic tone, for I am aware that what will be shared will be hard to fathom, grasp, or receive without deeming either yourʻs or my existence as delusional.

I too was skeptical the first time I visited this deep within. In all honesty I did exist in fear for a brief period of time, scared that I would not return and if I did make it outward, would I even be considered human at all. The first visit inward can only be compared to that of a caterpillar, freshly cocooned, as its own regurgitation dissolves all it ever knew. There was excruciating pain paired with a deep sense of satisfaction. Imagine, experiencing an intense craving that eats at you all while having it quenched simultaneously by eating it. I felt so compressed and restricted, yet so spacious all at the same time. There, I nearly lost my mind, which until that moment, that phrase never made sense to me, until my mind completely melted. Thankfully, I was granted understanding, a right of passage into the next phase of evolution and felt emergence grow wings. Now, my soul flies liberated though very much held by you.

To answer your question of, “Who are you in relation to the map I found?” Simply said, I am another version of a wanderer who was assigned this particular maze of life. What I learned is that the blueprint of me is not my own, nor does it belong to any one. Though unaware of where the original blueprint came from, I trust myself to adhere to the guidelines as much as I trust you to hold the information coming. Again, I have never felt drawn to share this or explain the path I have taken to get here, yet something in me knows you are in the right position to ask and receive.

There is a sense that once you read this, I may become irrelevant, and you may become quite unrecognizable to self. This map you carry is unique, or perhaps I have some bias, because it is the only path I have ever known. In truth, there are many different archetypes, characteristics, and qualities in beings and perhaps it is nothing unique at all. Rather, it is no more or less, than simply holding a frequency that matches this particular path. In more direct words, this path belongs to that of a Time Traveler, though not at all in the way we have been conditioned to believe.

First, to understand what I am claiming, you must understand, or at least acknowledge, that time does not exist, because time cannot truly be known, only distance between objects is measurable. Humans, we humans, are so prideful to think we could ever truly harness such a concept of eternity into a 24 hour sequence. Clocked time is merely a distraction, and though there is much I could relay on that, I will remain present with your inquire and give you a clearer image of my position in the timeline.

I respond to you from seven cycles away. I can see you, but you cannot see me without seeing first beyond your current reflection staring back. What do I mean by this? There is a mirage between you and I, much like a two way mirror that some refer to as a veil between realms. The map is more than just an object I let go of along the way, it was an intentional symbol set down at the threshold, in hope that if I wandered forever, at least someone out there would be aware that I am in here.

How could I have known someone would find it? Let alone know if curiosity would be enough to reach me? I moved in faith, about five cycles before here, I found this map that woke me up into remembrance. The remembrance that life is forever in motion, and moves in rhythmic patterns, which allow an object to overlap itʻs own path as a reference point, time and time again. When I remembered this, I dropped the map at this very point of overlap, between the sixth cycle and this one, and let the current carry me, knowing that I would come across it again some day, in some way.

That way is found exactly where you are, positioned before the eye of the needle that has both birthed me and annihilated me thousands of times. The portal to my very heart if you will, so welcome in advance. Here, there will be moments where you stand at itʻs gates and we will feel one anotherʻs presence so close we could almost merge, while at other times we will feel so distant and nearly figments of another's imagination. In many ways, this is the point of no return, for once you decide to step forward, from there, you will no longer see the difference between here or anywhere. In truth, we only know as much as we can know in any given moment, as well as we cannot undo what we've come to know. With this reminder, before you respond by stepping forward, pause and ask yourself, are you willing to become accountable for the knowing that inevitably will become yours?

From here, I see you have decided to consciously begin the path I have forged ahead of you. One might wonder if I am relieved or rectified, from my position, and I am neither. You will come to know that neutrality is the only way to remain free from here, especially when from this view point several trajectories wait in limbo, always. It is important to not attach to any one; any one attachment creates a tether which would become an anchor to my soul and hold me from myself. Mind you, neutrality is not the same as dismissal. Do not dismiss any trajectory for they are all of equal potential to be in existence, while the opposite is true as well, do not over give attention to any one trajectory for that too may bring the collapse of it. Simply be.

In a world of complexities, more or less comprising 8 million other realities, how does one simply be? By remembering that everyone has their own compass and as they move they are bound to overlap, criss-cross, and possibly even get entangled with the patterns of others. Simply existing is to notice and allow. These instructions are all footnotes on that map you hold, however, since you have directly projected a question, I am doing my best to reflect deeper insights without extracting from your own freedom and potential.

Speaking of potential, I am reminded there is potential that you receive this response and reject it. There is also the potential you receive this and choose to keep the response as your own wisdom, and if you do that may be the collapse of this version of self positioned seven cycles away. It is possible that I am merely a figment of imagination and nothing more than one of those projected trajectories suspended in limbo. Yet, I remain unattached - though a part of me wonders how much attachment you have to the notion of my existence, perhaps that is what keeps me here.

In every way, if itʻs true for you then it must be for me. I too, recall wandering some time long ago, secretly speaking to a future version of me. Many times receiving responses that I either deemed synchronicity or mere coincidence. There are also many moments where wisdom from a distance came to me and stayed with me. I do believe I am the last known of us, for I do not speak ahead to any other from my position here. Interestingly, I only speak with you, from here.

Well, look at that, in responding to you I have received an answer, to a question I did not even realize I had until now. Yes, even after all the cycles of death and rebirth, it appears there is an ounce of fear here. Perhaps that is what keeps me tethered and unable to move further. That fear we share is in becoming irrelevant, forgotten, or unnoticed. Yet, the way I see it, is that there is a great amount of relief and freedom in this. For on one hand, grief arises knowing that I have taken many steps to be here, and yet they were never for any one particular version of me. Meaning, in a way, I have walked great distances on behalf of many others. On the other hand, there is an enormous amount of joy in this, for if I collapse when you receive this understanding, then I will have become the very essence of all the knowledge I once accumulated; becoming a vapor of unconditional love dispersed for other versions to breathe in.

Who, what, when, where, and why - so many questions young one. I must say, you have spurred deep reflection, even in me, through these curiosities. This response will leave you with more questions than answers, I am certain of that. Yet, as mentioned early on I will not apologize, for in my best attempt to answer you, I have made every conscious attempt to keep you free. There is no want to control how you receive this, and any response returned from you will be welcomed. I have faith in where you are and trust the map will guide us closer, rather than apart, this upcoming cycle.

What do I mean by keeping you free? Well, as shown before, any attachment creates an energetic tether, and it would be very wrong of me to tell you every step that I took, and create an expectation in you, to need to follow it. In my reality, which I believe is shared by other path wanderers, is that any harm done to, or inflicted upon another, is wrong. Trust me and my view point from here, when I say, harm would retrace my footsteps if I told you too much or too little.

Remember time is an illusion, only distance between objects, both tangible and intangible can be measured. Too much influence of thought would not allow you the pure freedom to choose, in the moment, what your heart desires or needs. Ultimately, that is always your truest reference point, therefore to deny a heart's desire is to choose inauthenticity and walk aimless - by far the only real sin. For a rogue object in space only disrupts others and brings harm. Please, take a moment here and breathe into these feelings, even the discomfort is showing you how to step next.

You will notice, the map inward has one grand, governing pattern and yet you get to decide on the pace and stride of how the path is followed, which will either change everything or nothing. Now that you have found how to position yourself, in order to stand at the gate way inward, you will always have access to return, whether here, there, or anywhere in between now and then. There is no rush dear young one, do not fret nor worry. When you are ready to move through that fear and enter into love, I will be here to meet you. By then you will already have greeted many versions of me, and the relevance of I will only be as relevant as you. Until then, I remain suspended between time and space, here for the potential.

Yours Truly,

Another Self Returned