Rejection is Protection

So often we see REJECTION as a negative, thing - in the past, when we relied on others for our safety and nourishment, being excluded from the Herd can literally mean 'Life' or 'Death'.

Thankfully in our Modern Society we have a lot of safety nets. Many of us cultivate a network of support and friendship. But what if, what if, through envy or competition, we are excluded from the Group - what then?

Well, these days we probably won't die.

I can speak from experience that it feels more than just a little uncomfortable. It can also severely affect your mental health. This is especially true if an ex-partner or jealous family member is spreading lies to destroy your life and reputation.

Most people can't resist the delicious lure of salacious gossip (it's what sells newspapers after all).

This is what happened to me when I moved into my house 21 years ago. I'm not sure if even the Mafia would hold a grudge against a successful person for that long, especially if there was no evidence of any wrong-doing - but I'm here to be educated.

The story started over 21 years ago. My partner and I split, I'm not going to stoop so low as to assassinate his character, just to say that a lot of people lost their jobs because of his dishonesty. Once I found out the full sorry story, it was 'GAME OVER'.

Except that it wasn't and the manipulation, lies and untruths about me continued for decades.

I moved to a village hoping to find companionship and friendship.

Our community expect the residents to volunteer regularly, which is a very beautiful thing. However, not everyone can afford to give their free time and money to local incentives.

I came to grief on one of these initiatives and permanently injured my back whilst volunteering as a result. I was working in the village brook, clearing the riverbank and weed that grows in the river.

My neighbour sent me up the river alone, whilst he and his gardener went down the river. The plan was, the two men were going to cut the weed, and I had to clear it off.

The only problem was that the part of the river I was standing in was narrow. They were working with all their might, cutting as quickly as they could. The river is fast moving, and when the weight of this weed came down in huge chunks and hit me, it knocked me off my feet.

What made it worse is that my waders started taking in water and dragging me down the river. I tried to stand up, but every time I tried I was knocked back down by another pile of the cut river weed. Grabbing the weed didn't help, it just came away in my hand.

Eventually, I managed to get to the bank and haul myself out.

The next day my back was 'killing me'. It turns out that one of my vertebrae was knocked out of alignment. Not something that can be easily fixed for ladies of my age who have 'Brittle Bones'.

Of course, now that I'm of very little use to anyone, I didn't get invited to anything. People would walk past the door, none of them ever stop to say 'hello' or ask me how I was.

I'm now house-bound and can't even go for a short stroll.

Part of me was very glad, I didn't have to get pulled into all the dramas, fundraising and chores.

Housing Market Crash

Back in February 2003, when I bought the cottage everyone was telling me I was an 'idiot' because the property market was going to crash.

But I couldn't see the logic. 'Why would the Property Market crash?' I asked myself. For a start, mortgage rates were low, employment was high and there was a housing shortage - those are not the ingredients of a Housing Crash.

So, the estate agents convinced me to borrow more money and make an offer, which was accepted. My offer was much lower than the sellers would have liked - but there was no competition and there wasn't exactly a stampede trying to buy the cottage.

Anyway, long story short, the Labour Government of the time, Tony Blair and Gordon Brown, decided to cut the interest rate. Blair believed just as Margaret Thatcher did, that if people buy their own houses they will work and do whatever was necessary to keep their homes. This in turn keeps the economy strong.

The Housing Market didn't crash but turned around, and several people looked more than just a little foolish! AND SO THE VENDETTA BEGAN!

As the years went past, and I always felt the resentment. And then, I heard some rather upsetting news. One of the ladies from the village, who was a close friend of the couple I bought the house from, was killed in a car accident.

I kept trying to be included in their groups - I'd joined clubs and even a political group, but was definitely the 'outsider'.

This lady was invited out to lunch at a local pub. The group of them had a meal. The husband decided he didn't want to drive because he had quite a bit to drink, so the wife drove the car. Their friend was sitting in the back seat.

The car reversed into the road and an on-coming car hit it with such force that it killed the back-seat passenger. The newspapers said she died at the scene - it made me feel sad.

I was sorry to hear it, but part of me thought 'that could have been me! If any of them had included me in their lunch party, I would now be 'history.'

None of us know the Will of God, but when I heard the news, all I could think was 'Rejection is Protection'.

Thank you for reading to ... the End