Never a Dull Moment

Roofing is simple to learn, but it’s no easy feat. Especially if heights terrify you. That was my issue, but heights did not just terrify me, it petrified me. Now here I am 3 years later and still terrified of heights, however, it pays the bills. I have climbed 2 and even 3 story buildings to make one repair.

Before I made a move to the company I currently work for, I was once part of a clean up crew that worked on condemned houses owned by the city.

This particular house was previously owned by an older gentleman who had no next of kin. Once he passed away, the city took ownership of the house and it was set to be demolished. My job was simple, get on the roof and ensure the structural integrity was safe for clean-up crews to enter and remove the belongings. The possessions of these houses generally went to the Salvation Army, Goodwill and other stores like them.

As I climbed onto the roof, just as I have done many times before this, I noticed the roof was maybe 5 or 6 years old. It had recently been redone. My job wasn’t necessarily to look in the house or even to remove anything, but since the house was set to be demolished, I figured “what the hell”. As I peeled away a few shingles, I was able to see through the old rafters of the house and into the attic. You could tell the attic hadn’t been touched in years, and on the other side of the attic, I could clearly see a small box sitting next to the rafters. I obviously allowed curiosity to get the best of me, and at this point, I have not yet gotten down to report my findings to the crews below.

So, I made my way to the other side of the roof, and again, peeled away some of the shingles, I was even able to remove one of the rafters. Since I am not allowed to enter the homes, I just wanted to see what types of things these crews find. Once I was able to grab the box, I wedged it over to me and I was able to sneak a peek inside. It was hard to see inside the box due to the dust, and the lack of light. As I reached down inside the box, all I could feel was papers, I even pulled some out on the off chance that money was hiding inside. As it turns out, it was nothing more than some old divorce papers. After my little detour on the roof, I made my way down and gave the crews an all clear.

As I was sitting in my truck filling out my report, one of the crews came out of the house with a large painting, in the corner it said 1904 with a giant ‘P’ written on it. I just got this feeling that the painting had more value than what these crews were willing to recognize. So, I walked over and asked if I could have the painting, after all it never hurts to ask. The gentleman was very nice and told me that I could take anything I wanted as long as it wasn’t money. I agreed and took the painting.

That same day, I went across town to a local antique store and to my surprise, the lady gasped when she saw it. Before I could say anything, she immediately asked what I wanted in exchange for the portrait. I was a bit shocked to say the least, but I did not want to sell myself short, so I asked,

Me: What are you offering?

she replied: $15,000

Now I was in shock, I could not believe what I was hearing. Of course, who doesn’t want $15,000? But I kept my cool, after all I had to know why this was worth so much. So, I asked:

Me: What makes this worth $15,000?

Oh, dear. -She replied, It is worth much more than that at auction. This painting is part of the Picasso collection.

I replied: Picasso? Like the famous painter, Picasso?

She just laughed, but asked if I was willing to sell it. I of course wanted $15,000, but I also did not want to sound too greedy either.

So I said: $20,000 and it is yours.

Upon hearing my rebuttal, she agreed without a moment of thought. Maybe I undersold myself, but I just made $20,000 by sheer luck. Though because of this money, my wife and I were able to move and start fresh with a new job. Due to this new job, I was not able to comprehend what would happen next.

The fear of falling - as one can imagine - only becomes greater the higher you climb. What would happen next would be the thing that changed my life.

I was not even two stories nor three stories off the ground. It all began at a measly 15 feet, who would have thought?

It was barely the middle of winter in Michigan and ice was prevalent as the snowy ground was poured upon by heavy rain. As I set up my ladder on the ever so frozen concrete just as I had done for the past three winters I knew this would be it - you know, that gut wrenching feeling that says don’t do this - either way I had a job to do.

I would say a solid 30 minutes of work was done, and everything was going smooth, then, while pounding in a nail, it happened. I barely had enough time to utter the words “oh shit” before I was face down on the frozen concrete. In a daze, I knew what had just happened, my vision blurry and my mind distorted. As I began to stand up I knew right away that my hand was broken. Though, I did not know the next thing to come is what would change my life forever.

I slowly gimped my way to the work truck and began to call 911 in search of the nearest hospital. The operator was very kind, she informed me that I should wait for an ambulance rather than driving 45 minutes to the hospital due to the possibility of a concussion. I in turn informed her that there is no way I am paying $800 for something I could do myself. So, I began my journey towards home. All banged up and hurting, and on my drive home, I noticed a car in the ditch. As I slowed my vehicle, I also noticed a car seat and that the airbags had been set off. With no one in sight I knew what had to be done.

As I pulled over, I began to notice debris lying everywhere, I thought to myself “this must have been a two-car wreck”, though no other cars were in sight. As I approached the vehicle I noticed the driver was alive and conscious. She even called me over to her as if she knew me. At this point I knew it was more than just your ordinary Michigan car wreck.

She spoke to me in an ever so calming voice:

Driver: are you him?

Me: ma’am are you alright, is there anyone else in the car?

Driver: are you him?

At this point I am just trying to get her help and keep her awake, so I played along.

I approached the vehicle and knelt down beside her broken window, and asked:

Me: am I who? Are you waiting on someone?

Driver (replied): he will be back, you need to leave.

Me: ma’am, you’re hurt I need to call 911.

As I pulled out my phone, she quickly moves to grab it and says “no, there isn’t any time. You need to take this and leave.”

I was dumbfounded “what the hell is going on?” I thought to myself. Then she hands me a plastic bag - like the kind you get from grocery stores -, and says “go, now! You can’t be here when he returns.”

At this point, like any sane person would think, she’s distorted and is in need of help.

Then she mutters again, “take this and leave! You cannot be here.” She then opens her door and slowly climbs out. Before I knew it, she was making her way to the wood line. I tried to stop her, but maybe I wasn’t aggressive enough. She just turned and said “If you don’t leave now, you never will.” I did not know what was happening, I was confused and had a quick moment of recollection that I too did not want help after my accident just moments ago. Who am I to coerce her into getting help?

As the rain turned into snow - a thick blanket of snow might I add - the visibility of my surroundings began to fade. Still dumbfounded and confused by what just happened, I slowly made my way back to the truck. Once inside, I drove to a nearby gas station to call medical services. They asked me to wait at the Gas station for questioning by a police officer. As I waited, and waited, about 2 hours had passed and still in tremendous pain from my fall. A police officer pulls up behind me and requests that I step out of my vehicle.

This is when things got weird, as if we hadn’t hit that point yet.

He asked me exactly what I had seen, and so I told him. He asked me three times from what I remember. I began to feel like Peter from the Bible when Jesus asked him 3 times if he loved him. So, the officer with a confused look on his face asked me to ride with him in his cruiser to the exact location of the accident.

Upon arrival, I immediately thought to myself - wtf -, at this moment I began to question everything. We got out of the vehicle and he asked again, what happened. I was speechless, I couldn’t believe my eyes. There was no debris, there was no car, no tracks from tires or feet. He asked me to walk him through what had happened, at this point I did not know how to answer him. The officer then spoke once more and asked “what happened to your hand?”

I at least knew that was real, if anything, I had actually fallen off a ladder. The officer, using common sense knew of the possibility that I had hit my head and was possibly suffering from a concussion. Upon hearing my story, he called me an ambulance, to which I agreed. Still profoundly confused and disoriented from the very real possibility that I may have imagined this whole scenario. I decided it best to keep my mouth shut, I don’t need to end up being admitted as well.

After 2 days spent in the hospital trauma unit, I had been released. Upon returning to work I noticed that my truck had been brought back to the motor pool. I climbed inside to look for my wallet and there it was, I had completely forgotten about it. The plastic bag I was given by the driver, and I remembered the words she uttered just before disappearing into the thicket of the woods.

Inside the bag was a little black book, and inside the book is the very thing that would change the course of my life forever.